Discrimination/Fat Ladies

[lisaaw]

I hope this isn't too controversial for this board but does anyone else besides me feel they are being judged and discriminated against because of their weight?

Most of my adult life, I've been slim and petite but since I've become overweight, the way others respond to me is as different as night from day.

I'm still the same person I was.......outgoing, friendly, bubbly personality and I still take a lot of pride in my personal appearance. I've continued to dress fashionably, wear makeup and my hair always looks nice but sometimes the disgusted looks I get from strangers just makes me want to go home and hide from the world. Has anyone experienced the lack of respect that's shown to overweight people? And how about rudeness?

Another thing I have noticed is how my social life began tapering off when I started gaining weight. Not my choice, the invitations just gradually stopped coming. Is the world's value system based entirely on body image?

I'm so glad to have found this board. Everyone is so warm and caring and the support is phenomenal. Thanks for being here.

Lisa

[JoanOH]

I doubt there are many of us who are overweight who have NOT experienced this type of discrimination. I've experienced it my entire life and am only now finding out what it's like NOT to get those strangers' looks shot at you when in line at a buffet restaurant or as I go to sit in a seat on a plane, etc.

It's long been known that "society" (meaning "media") places emphasis on the tall slender woman, and that this has been force-fed to us via TV, magazines, advertisements, practically since birth. The Barbie Doll is a classic example.

I'm almost on the "other side" now -- 20 lbs from goal after being more than 150#s overweight. The absence of the nasty looks and snide comments is more noticeable to me now than when they were happening. I think I just chose to ignore them while they were going on, but deep down, I heard or saw every single one of them.

The GOOD news is, I didn't lose the weight for a bunch of strangers who couldn't bother to get to know ME, the person. I lost the weight for my own health reasons, which is the best reason of all. I can't change the way strangers felt about me -- their prejudices belong to them and there's nothing I can do about it. For some, it was their loss that they didn't get to know me simply because I didn't fit into their vision of the "acceptable" female.

My first love didn't marry me because I was overweight. I have watched him go through marriage after marriage (4!) and have to admit to a great satisfaction in thinking to myself "You had your chance at a great marriage, buddy... your loss." I've been happily married for 26 years and am a GREAT wife!! LOL

Lose the weight for yourself and for your health. As to the strangers - it's their loss that they're missing out on knowing you!!! So long as YOU are happy with the person you are -- that's what really counts.

Joan J

[dreamof145]

Well said Joan. I totally agree. What matters is how you feel about yourself and your health.