They say the holidays are

[dreamof145]

a time when more people become depressed than any other season. I know this was true for me for many years. It just seems to be a time when seeing so many happy people reminded me that I wasn't happy. To compensate for not being happy, I ate. And I became even more unhappy as I put on more weight.

This year, right now, I am trying to convince people to change their attitude before they sink into a holiday depressed state. Start thinking positive thoughts and doing positive things. It really does impact the way you think and live.

Here are a few suggestions:

For every thing that happens, look for the bright side in it.

Force yourself if necessary to smile at at least 5 people today, 10 tomorrow and so on. Soon you'll be smiling without even thinking of it. Keep a mirror by the phone and smile when you are talking to others. They will hear the smile in your voice and it will be contagious to keep them from smiling.

Find some POSITIVE quotes, affirmations and sayings that make you feel good. Post them by your computer, in the bathroom or carry them in your wallet when you need a pick-me-up.

Every morning, wake up and tell yourself that you absolutely refuse to let negative thinking stink up your mind. Then...follow through and try to find positive in everything that happens. Make a game out of turning negative conversations that others are trying to inflict on you into positive ones. I do this regularly and it really works. (and its kind of fun to see how long it takes to make that person realize its not as bad as they think)

Associate yourself with happy & successful people -- like the ones here in the ADBB.

Read inspiring stories. The ADBB is full of them. I also read the success stories from other websites about weight loss.

Visualize what you want to happen to you and write down HOW you can make those things happen. A list is great to have, cause you can't say you forgot or ignore what you need to do to make it happen.

Give yourself credit for all you do and all you've accomplished. Don't look back at any failures, we all have lots of them. Just look ahead at all the great opportunities that await you and make plans to achieve them.

I just thought this was an important thing to share with everyone. I remember so many (too many) sad holidays that I experienced -- If this helps just one person to have a happier season, then it is worth it.

Happy thoughts make your life happy. Miserable thoughts make your life miserable.

[ladyinred]

Re: They say the holidays are

I agree Dream. Lots of people are sad at the holidays. Instead of being one of them, how about helping one of them. You can donate toys and food to needy causes and foodbanks. Or if you're low on cash, donate some time by helping out. Lots of charities need help at the holidays. It makes you feel good and takes your mind off whatever is bothering you.

[dreamof145]

Re: They say the holidays are

Yes, I should have mentioned this. Our family (from being Military for so many years) is deeply involved in the food shelters, women and children shelters, toys for tots and writing to the soldiers all the time and especially during the holidays. I also pick a few small kids in my neighborhood (usually single family kids) and do a secret Santa for several days before Christmas. I just get stuff at the dollar store. Its fun to hide and ring the doorbell and watch them scream and carry a little package into their house. Anything to put a smile on someone's face brightens my life. Especially a kid.

[softnred]

Re: They say the holidays are

I totally agree!!! I work in educating probationers on a daily basis, and they tend to see only the wrong that is in their lives. To try and combat it, I make a "Thankfullness Wreath". I fashion a ring out of cardboard and put it on the wall or door. I cut out a bunch of construction paper leaves in fall colors. The students take a leaf and write down something that they are thankful for, then they tape it to the circle. They can do as many or as few as they want. After several have been taped to the cardboard, it starts to look like a wreath. Some really get into it and do many leaves, some only do one and can only be thankful that they're not in jail anymore. On the last night of class before we break for Thanksgiving, we take the wreath outside into the parking lot and burn it...releasing the thankfullness into the universe. It's a neat tradition and helps to make them see...if only for a few minutes...that there ARE things in their lives to be grateful for.

We're starting one at home this year...with Christopher coming home for Thanksgiving...I'm extra extra thankful now!!!

~JoAnne

[dreamof145]

Re: They say the holidays are

JoAnne,
I love this tradition. I think I'll do a 'thankfulness wreath' at the developement center!! What a great idea. Thanks for telling me about this.

It is really hard to keep positive thoughts when things go wrong around us. I am still practicing doing this. My daughter right now is pregnant and broke up from her boyfriend...things seemed really sad for a few days around here, but now we are focusing on the baby and getting ready for her birth. The past week has been happier and we are joking again and smiling more. Babies are blessings and I'm sure that this little one (to be born in March) is going to bring us special blessings and enrich our lives!! I'm getting excited to have a grand-daughter...as I have two grandsons.

[2big4mysize]

Re: They say the holidays are

did you know that holiday blues are actually an urban myth and studies show that those with depression actually report less symptoms and less new causes at this time of yr but every yr the news folk do a story on it and peptetuate the myth?

[softnred]

Re: They say the holidays are

My sister tends to have relapses around Christmas, and last year she spent a week in the mental hospital. But then again she's been relapsing a lot in the past year or so....

[cleochatra]

Re: They say the holidays are

Thank you for this thread.

We've bought into the marketing ploys that beseige us this time of year. We must buy the Halloween decor at Halloween. I mean, we can't escape it! It's everywhere! Supermarkets, Target, you name it.

Then it becomes a sudden new myth perpetuated by Madison Avenue and their buddies that we have to panic and starting spending-spending for Thanksgiving and Christmas. We have sales sales sales! We have to achieve more! buy more! Do more! Keep up with the trends! And, amazingly, there are a lot of sources who are more than willing to give us their advice on which new gadget is the must-have for the season.

The day after Halloween everyone starts yelling, "It's time to get ready for Christmas!"

No, it's not. It's time to breathe. Relax.

Just because everyone else jumps off Aunt Myrna's fruitcake, does this mean we have to also? Not me.

It's time to change the holidays, change the way we perceive the holidays and stop being what we think Madison Avenue and Martha Stuart wants us to be. The Pilgrims didn't have Wal-Mart. They had friendship and hardship. Jesus didn't have Armani. He had a stable and some moo-cows.

Somewhere down the line we've forgotten who we are, and we've given up thankfulness for a closer parking spot at the mall.

[softnred]

Re: They say the holidays are

For many years I've had a dream that when I met that special someone, we would someday take DS and go to an out-of-the-way cabin on a mountaintop with snow all around. There we would celebrate Christmas all by ourselves, without the world getting in the way. We'd bring a real Christmas tree with us, and we'd make our own ornaments and laugh at how silly they looked. We'd play in the snow, drink gallons of hot chocolate, play games and go for long walks in the snowy woods. For me, a week of doing that would be a REAL Christmas.

oh...and now that I've met the guy, we're planning to actually do that in a few years.