I think it's gone bad for me...

[Kellerina]

I have turned this "WOL" into a disorder I think. I am sorry, I just need to get this out and see if anyone else has gone through this.

I started about 2 months ago. Lost my needed weight. But now I am scared to do OWL. I have added a few little things, but still trying for the 20 carbs.

I am severely tired. I don't like anything any more. I am a ballet dancer, and I dread the thought of it. I dont want to do anything that takes energy. I feel like I am too fat still... And I want to lose MORE.

I have thought for the first time in my life about suicide. I count everything on fitday, I need to make sure of it. I stay home just so I can calculate what I eat.

I would kill for a banana. My fave food. I have no eated anything I wanted to since i started. I avoid all social situations because everyone else is eating normal. I am on the verge of tears all the time. I feel like I can't have or eat or do anything that will make me happy. I just want some friggen pop corn. But I don't want to get fat!

I can hardly do my ballet class anymore. I feel like fainting all the time. My legs are super weak. My skin is dry.

Worst off... I can NOT take a number two with out a laxative. I can't. I am so scared. I eat loads of flax and fiber veggies. I feel like I am dying. No I actualy feel worried for my life.

My room mate thinks I need a shrink. I just want to lose 10kg more so bad. Is it normal to feel super depressed. I don't think I have anything to live for. I can hardly move. And if I could where would I go? I don't even enjoy my coffee anymore. It is hard to measure a tbsp of cream when you are at starbucks. I hate it. I hate my self.

My ketostix hardly even measure trace any more. Oh and which I pee on each time I use the bathroom. But i don't get it. I am under 20 carbs. I eat my veg. Why can't I be skinny??

I am so scared. i am not my self. I could cry right now. I am hungry. Like not craving hungry, my stomach aches. I don't know what to doooooo!! By the time I have hit 20 carbs, I am at like 1200 cal and maybe 60 g of fat. I am shaky. I don't want to live.

I am really scared to post this, please don't be mean. I just need to know if this is part of it, or if something is going on??

I just want to be a good ballet dancer, and I lost what the teacher wanted!! But why cant I stop?!! why cant she be happy with me?!?! I look skinny to my self when I get up, but then I get comments through out the day. about how I dont look balletic. And some people dont even notice all the weight I have lost. I am soooo confused.

I am scared. Please help me.

[Minofex1]

Re: I think it's gone bad for me...

Kellerina, the first thing I want to say to you is that you are not alone. Hear that, understand it and believe it! We are here as a community and family to help each other. While we are not professionals, we are a group of people who have had similar experiences and can relate in some way or another.

The Atkins’ WOL is set up in phases to assist each person in understanding how many carbs their body can tolerate on a daily basis to ensure a healthy weight. In addition, it is a way to break ourselves of the food addictions and attractions which have captivated us and brought us to unhealthy points in our life. One thing that you must understand is that within this process moderation is extremely important.

Dr. Atkins did not intend for this WOL to start and end with the Induction Phase. It was designed as a way to wean us from the food items and habits that were not helping us. Even Extended Induction has its limitations in how our body responds which reduces its effectiveness, over time. The subsequent phases are designed to bring our eating back toward the “mainstream” while allowing us to keep away from the harmful foods.

What you need to do is reread Dr. Atkins’ New Diet Revolution. This will hopefully redirect your current perception of this WOE and put you back on track toward moderation. Furthermore, it should build confidence in you to step into the next Phase of the process. You will see that you can gradually add some of the foods that you enjoy back into your eating regimen.

Finally and most importantly, do not be afraid to discuss your situation with a health professional. We do not know your past medical history but your primary care physician may be able to give you some options and information that can be helpful. This is not a negative because you want your doctor to be aware of your current health condition, especially if you have had medical conditions in the past.

Our goal is to help you as much as we can but you will have to take the first step to reclaim your vigor and the positive results you had when you began this WOL.

I wish you success!

Regards,
- Minofex1

[rhiannonwins]

Re: I think it's gone bad for me...

I wish I could hug you right now...I really do.

I think in order for the more experienced members to help you better, you may need to post a link to your fitday so they can see what you're eating..or maybe post some sample day's menus here? Just a suggestion.

If you're feeling SO rundown, there could indeed be a medical reason for it so please don't rule out seeing a physician.

And just because you mentioned the word "suicide" and you sound so depressed, I can't let it slide, I think you should talk to someone in the mental health field. We would all be remiss if we didn't suggest that.

I saw your pictures in the gallery and you look beautiful and thin...and if people are judging you based on some "ideal ballerina body"...I know what that can do to your self-esteem. You may need some help in building that back up.

I just moved into OWL today and I was VERY scared about moving away from the "Induction Safety Net" -that's what I called it - but I feel like that will allow me more freedom to eat DIFFERENT foods and make me feel like I'm not in a rut. Perhaps that's how you're feeling and why you are so down...at least in part?

I wish you nothing but the best, girl. I really do.

[Tom]

Re: I think it's gone bad for me...

Please consult your doctor. This is not a starvation diet. We obviously are not doctors here and are certainly not qualified to give advice on these topics.

I need to close this thread. Please see your doctor immediately and let us know.