Tweet
My sister (the one who was always the skinny one ) is now 30 lbs heavier than i. she is complaining about all of the things i hated about my old fat body. her heart burn, her gas, her lack of motivation, how she is lazy, she hates how she doesnt feel sexy any more. I feel bad for the poor girl. at first im like i cant wait to be smaller than my sister. she and i had some drama go down a while back and she flipped and appologized to me. she told me she has always been jealous of me and that now that she is the fat sister i am now the skinny one. i didnt know how to take it. it is a complete 180 from what i am used to from her. so im proud of my accomplishments and i talk to her about them but i feel like i cannot tell her a whole lot because i dont want her to be sad or mad or enveous of me.
My aunt is so cute, she brags (not negatively just like look what i did sarah!
) to me about (i think i may be smaller than her as well) her being on the treadmill on a climb, and the elliptical and how she has been eating better. she talks to me often about her low fat stuff. i love that woman!! she is so genuine and kind spirited. i told my parents i was doing this marathon and i didnt get much feed back from them. my grandfather is being very supportive of me running this marathon (since its in honor of his wife, my grandmother) and he is sending me money for registration fees for my marathon!!
so my family is very supportive, my fiance wants to run it with me XD and my co workers always ask me about how my running is going. support up the wa-zoo
i have not been feeling good these last few days, so i have gone off the wagon to eat some crackers, pasta things of this nature. i am no longer attracted at all to white foods though. when i cheated it was ALL WHOLE GRAIN HA HA HA!! i laugh at this because i know in my heart i will always find it hard to eat white pasta or white bread. i dont really like them any more thanks to atkins. i consistantly want good foods. when i cheat and i tell someone i cheated they ask what did you cheat on and i say oh one snack cake, or i had a sandwhich, or i ate some whole grain pasta, a fruit cup then they look at me and go thats cheating??
i fear one of my friends' is jealous of me. she has told me herself. she says im so jealous, wheres sarah going im losing you. and she's like im getting so fat now.
she thinks that i am exercising too much, i told her i have been feeling sick, she tells me maybe im exercising too much. i felt like this was kind of a way of her sabotaging me. i dont exercise too much.
work is rough, i walk probably 50 miles a week at work that is a low estimate too. then i try to run i do maybe like 30 minutes every other day or so. on my off week i try to hit the gym and there i do weights and cardio. so its not a lot. its mainly work. i watch what i eat carefully even when i cheat. today i start over. i need to lose weight maybe even 20 lbs would be nice before the marathon. 20 is very ligit. i can do 20. to lose my full 37 lbs would be rough i can do that too but i feel like 20 is more resonable.
i have a tomato and cheese for lunch. not feeling too well so oh well.
if anything i need to run more. LOL wait until they all see me 37 pounds from now. what are they all going to think, i have been swamped by people who want my help to help them in their own weight loss battle. how can i instill that the most important thing for them is that they need to realise, this is no quick fix. ive stated this in other blogs. nothing worth fighting for is easy. i tell them you need the motivation, dedication and most importantly the DISCIPLINE!!
they say oh yeah, oh yeah i want this. but i see in their eyes the pain but they dont want to work. its a shame. they really all dont get it. i feel like they need their own wake up call before they do get it and start on their own journey. until then all i can do is encourage them when they get up, and sympathize when they are down.