This is what Motivates Suicide

[CoolBlackChick]

My parents' long time neighbor killed himself a couple of months ago. It was a shock to everyone who knew him. He was in his 80s.

I think that thoughts of suicide, and even plans of suicide are EXTREMELY common.

However, I think that most people think-about/plan/attempt suicide, not because they want to DIE. They do it because they want the pain (emotion and physical), hurt, the noise, memories, lonliness, emptyness, nightmares, hopeless to STOP.

If you see someone in need, please give them a helping hand in ADDITION to kind words and prayer. Don't tell them to stop belly aching or buck up and be tough. Don't just tell them they are not alone. Make SURE they are not alone in this world.

[GiGi Lafoo]

Re: This is what Motivates Suicide

Amen CoolBlackChick. You are so very right.

A few years ago we had a young coworker. He was in his early twenties and had some addiction issues he wanted desperately to be rid of. He'd get into legal trouble which would deepen his depression and addictions. He was such a sweet and lovable young man with curly blond hair, bright eyes and a sheepish little smile. He was like everyone's kid brother we were trying to support and help straighten out. And yes he talked about suicide. One day he asked me if I thought many people ever thought about it. I knew he lived with desperate demons and thought he was different from everyone else. Not as good as everyone else. I told him everyone has struggles big and small and he was made of wonderful stuff. That everyone makes mistakes in their younger years that feel overwhelming but you do get through them and just try to learn some good lessons from the hard stuff. I told him people cared so much about him and wanted to help. I tried to get him to seek professional help and his response was naw, not a problem, he was just wondering. Another coworker (who had heard his suicide comments before) and I spoke to our managers confidentially. They were both moms and very concerned. He was offered free sessions with a psychologist (something offered to all employees) and refused, again saying it was no big deal. So his friends at work made sure his parents were aware and one located at gun at the young man's house, took it apart and discarded it. Everyone was trying to help. The judge in his legal matters was trying to help. His friends and coworkers were trying to help. His family was trying to help. And he seemed to be doing so much better and accepting the help that was being offered.

And then he was under the influence and caused an accident. An innocent person was hurt. The legal problems became enormous and he had insurmountable guilt over being the cause of someone's pain and injury. And apparently he found another gun .

The line was long at the funeral home and for the longest time I stood beside a collage of photos of the young man and his family from his infancy on. My heart started squeezing in my chest and I couldn't breath. I could NOT look at those pictures and the line wouldn't move. Finally I couldn't avoid it anymore and there were all these pictures of a beautiful, laughing, happy little boy. It broke my heart to look at that precious little joyful and vibrant with health face and know how it ended for him on this earth. And then to see his devastated and heart broken family. If my heart felt like it was bleeding tears what were his parents feeling?

We tried to hang on but our grip wasn't tight enough and he just didn't think he was worth helping. .

No matter what it takes, even if it's against someone's will, when they are that depressed and despondent they need intense and constant help.

And I agree that people who think about, attempt or carry out suicide do NOT want to die. They just hurt so much they can't stand to live the way they are anymore.

EDIT

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