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**Lady_Hawke** · March 10, 2007, 06:34 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

Big Hugs Danny

You aren't alone. I'm here and so are alot of wonderful people at the ADBB. We care about each other, help each other through the tough times and celebrate our accomplishments.
I have a son, and if he was feeling like you are - I'd want him to come talk to me. Thats what Moms are for.
Nothing in the world is worth ending it - nothing at all. Life is beautiful.
You're 17. You're young and have so much ahead of you.....love usually finds you when you stop looking for it. At least thats what I've found with love.....I promise, you will experience love. Just be patient and in the mean time - enjoy life - smile.
You don't like the way you look. I don't like the way I look - Danny, thats why you and I and every member of the ADBB is here. To change the way we look - to get in shape and be healthy. And you are sooooooooo ahead of the game - doing it now while you are 17 is so awesome. You are so smart. I really wish I'd have been as together as you are when I was 17. (and yes, when I was 17 I was wondering if I was ever going to find love. I did - and so will you)
Confused about what to do next - well first talk with your Mom about how you are feeling - and hang in there. We all have our ups and downs. Lonely.....I get that way too. All of us do at one time or another. I live in Norway and all my friends live in the states. What do I do to entertain myself - I talk to the sheep. Its true. I talk to them, they are a bit stuck up - cows are nicer, when they aren't chasing me and my dog. lol
You know the great thing about being a member of the ADBB family - you're never alone. Someone is always here Danny.

**ValidRouge** · March 10, 2007, 06:51 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

Hi, Danny. I 100% agree with Lady Hawke here. At 17, you are HERE looking to do something about one of the issues you have in your life. I wish that at 17, I'd done something pro-active about my weight and my self image and ultimately my self esteem. You are FAR ahead of the game. I also agree with Tam that you should talk to your Mom or your Dad. In the meantime, I hope we here at ADBB could be supportive right now.

Today you've taken steps to do something about your weight. The Atkins Way is healthy and it WORKS if you really put your focus into it. I don't recall from your other posts what you want to lose, but this plan works really good. Another thing is that its going to stabilize your blood sugar which will help with the down in the dumps feelings.

**Scooterjam** · March 10, 2007, 07:44 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

Hey Danny.

Scooter here! Hey bud, I have a 17 year old son myself, I know that if he has something bugging him, he can come to me. 17, you are still so young, you have so much ahead of you dude! Tell me about yourself, what kind of stuff do you like, I know you've come to this site and wanted to lose weight, change your looks...that will be easy if you decide this plan works for you!
Did you read my post about the other 17 year olds, you can do this friend if you really really want to! How about music.....?? Do you play any instruments....?? If not, what kind of music do you listen too....??

Post back bro....tell me about yourself and what makes you happy!

Most importantly, I agree with Lady Hawk and and Joy...talk with your parents, open up to them and tell them how you feel.....

Love will happen, when you least expect it, trust me!

**cocobelle** · March 10, 2007, 08:09 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

hey Danny! First of all, realize that the feelings that you are having are COMPLETELY normal!!! I know it's hard to realize it, but your parents WERE 17 once. Yeah, it may seem like it was FOREVER ago.... but they may understand.

And then.... they may not, right? Is there a teacher at your school that you are comfortable with? An adult - coach, minister, etc - that you've made a connection with? I understand that - sometimes - parents are the LAST people that you want to communicate with. Sometimes, parents increase the pressure. There are adults in your life that care about you. You may not realize it, but they do.

Before you can find love, you have to love yourself. You need to discover the wonderful talents that you have to offer. (stop shaking your head.... you DO have them!!!) Whether it is music, sports, reading, or whatever.... there must be something that you know that you can do well, right? Take that interest, and share it with others. Maybe you can help out with the YMCA, Boys Club, Big Brother program? You are lonely and in need. There are kids - much younger than you - who are in the same boat. Someone who would LOVE to have someone to talk with!!

My husband didn't start dating until college. My oldest son is in his first 'real' relationship - he's 20. Don't rush it. The girls *will* be there for you, I promise.

You sound like a very smart man - you've been able to identify your own problems. That is a HUGE start! (There are people that spent countless hours in therapy and lots of $$ to get where you are now! ;-P ) You have all of the power! My youngest son went through a bit of what you are going through. He discovered the guitar, and spends quite a bit of time working on his music. He also lifts weights. He was called "Marshmallow Man" in middle school. He's spent the past two years working out. While working out, he found a couple of buds that are in the same boat. They support each other now.

Let me know how you're doing! I really do care!

{{{great big MOMMA hugs}}}}

**Oh.2.B.Fit** · March 10, 2007, 08:13 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

Hi Danny,
I'm sorry you're feeling so bad

I have suffered from depression most of my life. Something that you may find helpful is writting. Either here or in a journal at home. It helps to sort out your feelings and thoughts...they can be so overwhelming. And it is a nice release to get your feelings out. I'm thinking of starting a journal on here. I have others, but I think it will be nice to have one on here because there is so much support, and everyone is so supportive. I hope you feel better sweetie

**Danny2007** · March 10, 2007, 08:58 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

Aaww, You dont know how nice it is to hear such comments, so caring and polite, thanks guys! The things is at the moment my parents are going through a divorce, and although I do what I can to stay strong, sometimes its a little hard to.
I suppose If genetics was anything to go by, I'm pretty much doomed. Both my parents and 2 of my sisters have at some point in their lives dealt with depression. I've tried keeping a diary of all my thoughts but I usually find that I start to analyse myself whilst re-reading it a few months later to see if anything has changed, and whilst it hasnt, I just feel useless that no progress is being made.

I was speaking to my closest friend about it today, and it did feel alot easier getting it off my chest. I guess you can say that the poor quality of my life is due to me hating the way I look. At times I can be satisfied with the way I am, however nowadays this seems more like a rare occasion.

Another thing that gets to me a great deal, is my friends. Most, if not all my mates are female, I've grown up with 4 sisters so I find it easier to talk and be friends with girls. However now I've reached that age where I am wanting guy friends, not only to relate my problems with, but to most importantly have fun. I've never had a relationship with my dad, so I've pretty much grown up with my own instinct and outlook of life without the helping hand of a father. I also get too emotionally attached to people, I get easily hurt, the smallest of things really do get to me.

Its like the other day, I thought I found someone who really liked and appreciated me. Its just the way they were towards me that made me feel as if they were interested, however having said this, its now obvious to me that they were just being friendly, I was however mislead into thinking that they really liked me, maybe I'm just desperate.

To sum up all of the above, I would say that yeah I am in need of love and acceptance, it being with one's self and with a another person. I'm just finding it hard!

**julirama723** · March 10, 2007, 09:21 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

Danny, I think the others gave some great supportive advice. I too, wish I'd been so pro-active and wanting to improve my life at 17!

Most of my friends have been guys. I've always been more comfortable with guys, had more fun with guys, and actually have a lot in common with guys, more so than I ever seem to have in common with girls. At first I was kind of bummed out about this, thinking there was something wrong with me, but then I realized how lucky I was to have that connection with the opposite sex. As I got older, I realized that I had an advantage over other girls because while they turned into complete idiots in the presence of an amazing guy, I was ubercool and enjoying the attention!

And friendship is a good thing. While this girl may not be romantically interested, she is interested in you as a person and that could be the start of a lifelong friendship.

You will find love when you least expect it (trust me on this one) and ONLY after you can love yourself. So, this atkins journey will be an excellent foray into self-acceptance for you. Gradually you'll begin to feel better, look better, and have more confidence. That's an understatement! You'll make your body, mind, and soul a healther place to be.

So, Danny, you youngin', you have such a rich and full life ahead of you! Don't try to change who *YOU* are when you're making your body healthy. Develop interests like sports, or music, or writing, or whatever you like, and you will meet others who have the same passions that you do.

Keep on posting, and let us know how you're doing.

**bdanderson** · May 21, 2007, 11:30 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

Danny,

As a teen , I was miserable, thinking of suicide every day, and I hated my life. I cannot tell you how good life really is, because, at that age, it seems impossible. Here are some awesome things about being 17:

you have a great FICO score(don't screw it up!)
you can move out of your parents house next year!
you are healthy
you are young don't squander it.

I'm telling you when you feel down, immediately drop and do 20 pushups. Get out of the house. Enroll at your local mma/ju-jitsu school, or , get in a band. listen to Motorhead, go get a job. Life is great, especially at 17, I hope you are listening.

**bdanderson** · May 21, 2007, 11:31 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

you need to be your best friend. Wait 17 years, you'll see what I mean. Get out there and kick some *** now 'hear?

**warbishop** · June 29, 2007, 08:21 PM

Re: I'm in serious need of a friend.

danny dont be bummed!! At 17 sometimes life seems like it can suck, but you can work your way out of whats ailing you. And something to consider too, doing atkins will help you. If your sugar is too screwed up then u will feel sad and like crap and it can seem like u r miserable. I know, I have been there. But like everyone has said already, you got your whole life ahead of yourself!! Get going on atkins, get your *** into shape, and work hard to make something of yourself and be proud!! Goto school, work hard and save save save, and get into shape!! and dont forget all the good things about yourself, I know there are some. There always are.

"If you don't deal with life, It will deal with you!!"

war

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