And it comes back

[Miss Seaneen]

And old habits die hard, back to throwing up, cutting, not sleeping, god knows. I'm off my diet, I have no energy. I need to get back on, all I can do is chew on bread then throw it up. Old habits. Recently, everything has fallen apart.

[Peterlock]

Hi Miss Seaneen,

I'm sorry to hear you're on a downward spiral, I really am. If I remember the last post of yours I responded to you were wavering between feeling ok and not feeling ok at all.

I think for your own a benefit, I wouldn't minimize anything that you're going through or any behaviors that you're compelled to do or acting out for relief of pain as habits. They're symptoms, they're signals, they're cries for help regardless whether you accept that or not - but that's what they are.

Most importantly they can be turned around, and whatever "fell apart" can be put back together and made stronger. Now I know you may not believe that and that's fine but you have to understand that depression is an umbrella and lots and lots of depressive disorders fall under that general term of "Depression".

Like any illness the first steps towards getting well are recognizing you have a problem that's beyond your control and ruining the quality of your life.

You've done that, in admitting how you feel, and that's great it really is. You might be surprised to know just how many people never can admit to themselves that they're ill.

Now what you need to do is seek out help with a psychiatrist. If you have one already great, but something tells me, maybe the tone of your brief post that you don't - and that's dangerous.

Find yourself a Doctor, get a recommendation, a referral and if you can't do it for yourself do it for the people who love you.

Make a promise to that part of you that doesn't want to be sad and tortured any longer, after all doesn't she deserve a break? a chance to experience life as she deserves to?

It really does all start there, with the right Dr, finding the right meds and taking it second by second.

And if it's your hundredth Psychiatrist and you've been through a gazzilion meds it doesn't matter, you keep going anyway because you just don't know if it's the next opportunity that can finally help you.

Nothing has fallen apart that can't be made right, even made better.

But you have to want to be well. There has to be a spark of hope in your heart bright enough to show you that saving yourself is the most important thing in the world right now. Even though you may not believe it, you don't have to go through this alone.

Peter :hug

[ttdriver]

WHAT PETER SAID!

Ms. Seaneen, you are SO WORTH IT. Hon, please get help. You deserve to be at your best.

My heart aches for you. I went through serious depression 6 months ago and I was ready to call it quits. I got some good help and I am so much better.

THERE IS HOPE. PLEASE FIND SOME HELP.

:hug :hug :hug :hug :hug :hug :hug

Betty

[da Walnut]

~hugs tightly~

Don't give up, you're too special a person, no matter what you feel at this morning.

Peter is right, talk to your doctor and get help, there is nothing wrong with going to the medical profession to battle this recurring monster called depression.

Until you do, just think about making it to the next heart beat. I know you can do that, just one heart beat at a time, until you can look at a second of time, but no further. And if that is too much, just move back to those hear beats.

~hugs again and isn't about to let you go~