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I found out today that I will need FOOT SURGERY very soon.
For those who don't know it, I've been a runner for 4 and a half years. Love it. I absolutely LOVE running. For me, its been my ZEN. I cannot begin to describe the personal satisfaction that running has given me. In a few words, it has literally TRANSFORMED my life, not only physically, but on every level. I've discovered things about myself that only running could reveal. I've discovered that I am a true COMPETITOR to the core of my being; whether its competing against others or just competing against myself. I've discovered that I can not only complete ONE 26.2 mile marathon, but TWO...at age 50+... I've discovered that's ITS NEVER TOO LATE to redeem the years spent idly sitting on a couch flipping the remote ... its never too late to TURN BACK the proverbial CLOCK and see your strength and vitality return just when you thought it was LONG GONE ....
This my friends, is where the story takes a VERY SAD turn ..
In October, 2006, during a 5k race (3.1 miles) (hardly a challenge for a woman who has run 26.2 miles, right?) I did *something* to the ball of my foot .. yes, during the race (during which I set a PERSONAL BEST finish time), I felt a snap, a pop .. something in the ball of my foot/big toe .. not sure which at that point) ... well, fast forward a few months/years ... to today, July 7, 2008....after MONTHS of intense pain, but running nonetheless ... and mega miles ...I would guess roughly 1500 or more .. the doctor has confirmed it ...
I NEED SURGERY ON MY FOOT. DA** DA** DA**...
I have, what is clinically known as HALLUX RIGIDUS a clinical term for the fact that my big toe on my left foot has LOST ALL CARTILAGE ... from 4 and a half years of pounding the pavement (which I LOVE doing, by the way...
)... I basically have NO JOINT SPACE between my foot and my big toe, so with every step I take, its BONE ON BONE .... the doctor says if I don't have the surgery, soon, I will have to have complete joint REPLACEMENT ... So here's the deal:
Surgery to saw off the bone in my foot so that I will have some degree of articulation (that is, BEND in my toe joint) ... we are talking SCREWS and a METAL PLATE implanted in my foot ..
8-10 weeks of NO RUNNING ... 3 weeks in a cast, followed by 5 more weeks on crutches ... DO YOU FEEL MY PAIN YET???????????????? I cried for the better part of an hour after that appointment....Help me here ... I am feeling lower than the scumbuckets of the earth about now ...
Fortunately, my podiatrist is a runner himself and TOTALLY understands how runners feel at this point ... his goal is to get me running again .. and hopefully in time to start my marathon training in October ... please God ... HELP ME ...
I think of all those folks I know who couldn't care less about running .. in fact, many people my age who have scoffed at how much I run .. and I think, "why couldn't THEY be the ones with this problem?"
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Betty
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Betty, You are NOT scumbucket chum! You are beautifully and wonderfully made with a remarkable gift of running, and you WILL always have an awesome testimony to share with others about running--no matter what age. 
You are fortunate to have a podiatrist who is a runner & he understands what you are going through. Most important thing you can do after the surgery is do exactly what the doctor & physical therapist tells you to do. You'll be training for your marathon & back to your Zen! 
I know how much you love the running and how happy it makes you (yes, okay, so I secretly lurk in your running threads and you might have been one of the folks who inspired me to get out there and start running the races). It's true that at least your doctor can understand how hard it must be... even if he can't make it better. 
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