Please read.

[edenedee]

Hi, I am eden. I have been a member of the bulletin board for maybe 3 weeks. Well I ask a lot of different questions about random things. See I have an eating disorder. Aneroxic/bulimic/lax abuser. Basically all the above. I have somewhat been doing the atkins diet, I have just been eating meat and like 1 or more packs of sugar free gum. (yes I know I am not allowed on induction) and then diet dr.pepper. But I have also been taking laxatives and the diet pill Alli. I chew so much gum (like I chew all the flavor out, spit it out, get another piece).. not actually eating/swallowing it...lol.
But my weakness when it comes to food is sweets and breads (like butter rolls, bread sticks, crust..lol) but mainly sweets. So since I have "somewhat" started this new diet I have craved white chocolate (well just chocolate) something awful. I slipped up a few times and binged and purged on chocolate. Oh and once on my moms famous cinnamon biscuits (has powered sugar icing!!)
I don't know why I am posting this, I just need the truth to be told and I thought that HOPEFULLY someone on this forum will be able to help me somehow. I do see a therapist and take prozac. ( although I haven't seen my therapist in a month, she never seems available when I am).
Also I forgot to tell yall. Right now I just have been researching the atkins diet, the south beach, and the GI diet to see which one I really think is best for me. But the reason I am trying a lower carb diet is b/c the carbs is what I binge/purge on.
well thanks

[jrnyback2life]

Re: Please read.

HI eden,

I can't say I understand what having an eating disorder is like, but i do know friends who have suffered from same and i sympathized with your plight. I did notice you said your therapist is never available when you are but it sounds like you need a therapist who can be, perhaps you may want to express this and see if you can find another who is more accessible. I would say that you have to focus and make a decision to follow through on this but i don't know enough about eating disorders to offer advice as to what to do. However, many of us deal with being carb addicts which you seem to mention above (i.e., sweets, breads, etc) and the only way around that i know is to do induction as written and get through the pain of detoxing from carb addictions, there is no other way around it. As you said you binge and purge on carbs, perhaps if you no longer find yourself wanting carbs because you've broken the addiction, you may find it easier to control your disorder.

So i will end with, use the board for as much support as it offers which it does a lot. Good luck and will see you around the board!

[angelcakes]

Re: Please read.

i felt so awful reading your post, because i really do know what you are going through. i have struggled with an eating disorder in the past - bulimia. first and foremost, you MUST get professiional help in order to get better. you mentioned that you have seen a therapist, but that you haven't seen them in a month. the best thing you can do is make the time to make an appointment with the therapist, if they do not have openings, find another therapist if you must. i was in therapy for two years before i really felt like i was in control of my bulimia.

that said, i know exactly what you mean about carbs being the food you binge/purge on. it is so true! they are the easiest things to binge and purge on. i'm not a doctor, but i do know that when i did atkins i found myself not binging/purging as much because you simply don't want to/can't with the food you are eating.

however, this is not a cure for bulimia. having been there, i would not recommend going on any diet plan until you have gone to a therapist and stopped your eating disorder behavior. when i went through it, i realized that i had to deal with the bulimia FIRST, then when i was in a healthy place physically and mentally, only then could i try to lose weight in a healthy way.

i hope that you will see your therapist and talk to them about what you posted here. i hate to say it, but it doesn't sound like you are eating healthfully right now and may still be struggling with an eating disorder. you didn't mention your weight, so i'm wondering if you are in fact overweight, or, as is the case with many who have anorexia or bulimia, if you just THINK you are.

i have been through it, so if you have any questions, please do not hesitate to ask me. anything at all. you can pm me if you'd like... i am happy to help if i can. i just can't say enough though how important it is that you seek help and try to deal with your eating disorders first. what is more important is that you start eating normal and healthy. i know it took me awhile after i stopped my bulimic behavior before i was in a place where i felt i could try dieting without falling into the same behavior.

good luck. i hope you will take care of yourself!