Why

[Laurenfra]

Ok we know our addictions are bad. For some of us they control our lives. Why do we allow them to have control. I have met very few smokers, drinkers or drug takes who want to be addicted. Why can't we just say no?
Opinions people________

[tickletussler]

I hate being addicted to ADBB *sigh* :sadblinky



I don't know how to respond to this post... but I do know that I can be "addicted" to some things, for example like computer games... but you see, I weigh up my "addictions" - computer games takes my mind off eating in the evenings, so I'd rather be addicted to that than think about food - does that make sense?

I'm wondering if some of us allow addictions to control our lives because in some love-hate way, we are familiar with an addiction - meaning we've known it for a long time and even though we may hate the addiction, at the same time it's comfortable because we've known it for a long time.

A long time ago I was admitted a few times to the psych ward due to a few OD. I was pretty depressed at the time, and ironically, I had an eating disorder as well. Once I was admitted to the hospital, I found other teens my own age who I could relate to, and I didn't want to leave the ward. On one hand, I didn't like the underlying reasons that led me to the ODs, but on the other hand, I found comfort in the people I knew there, and every time I left the ward, I couldn't hack being away from these people I knew (and were there for long-term), so I kept coming back.

So this is what I mean by the "love-hate way" and being so comfortable with addiction, we don't want to "leave" it.

[cleochatra]

For me, I think it's because the rewards haven't been outweighed by the risks yet.

[Laurenfra]

OK here is the definition

[n] an abnormally strong craving
[n] being abnormally tolerant to and dependent on something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming (especially alcohol or narcotic drugs)

[ttdriver]

Addictions are usually 'crutches' to get us through the tough times in our lives. Oh sure, they don't start out as addictions, but more and more we rely on the false sense of 'security' they afford us.

For me, I was addicted to carbs for 40+ years. Along came DANDR 2002 and I found the tool I needed to break that addiction. It was scary at first; what if I failed? But eventually it became more of a 'what do I have to lose' mentality. Never in my wildest did I expect to find such an empowering result.

Now that I have been at goal for going on 2 years, I realize that nothing is inconquerable. Its a mental battle as much as a physical one. If you will yourself to succeed, then success is yours.

Betty

[pockets]

I started smoking when I was 16. I was working as a waitress. Everytime you took a break. You would go to the breakroom and smoke. Never, knew how out of control it would get.

[goin2Bgood]

Re: Why

Why can't we just say no?
Opinions people________

I think what Cleo says about the the rewards haven't been outweighed by the risks yet makes sense for me too. That, and I hate change even if it's for the better. Change of any kind pushes the boundaries of my comfort zone and makes me anxious and holy ****, as I'm typing this I've had an epiphany.

Change of any kind pushes the boundaries of my comfort zone and makes me anxious

I have been fighting anxiety and some depression for the last 4 months and I think this is why. My weight loss scares the **** out of me. My weight loss also has crawled to almost a stop the past 4-6 weeks. I'm literally losing one pound a week when I could easily be losing 3-4. Why? Because I've added nuts in but instead of limiting myself to 1 oz of peanuts a day I'll often times have 3-4 oz. I'm also overdoing the cream. I'm sabatoging myself.

The best thing for me to do would be to drop the nuts and cream and get a handle on things, but I've been telling myself that for the last Month and I fight back saying "But I don;t feel good, I'm anxious, this is my comfort food" Hello... freaking hello... back to old habits (eating for comfort) while justifying (also an old habit) and it doesn't help the anxiety anyway.

I think it's time to check out OA with an open mind. I apologize for going off topic on this thread, but saying this is going to help I think and I've been having a real hard time this past month. Silly, I have my first appt. with a psychiatrist today, maybe I was meant to read this thread before going LOL

Anyway, for me perhaps I shoudl amend it to say the "perceived rewards haven't been outweighed by the risks yet"

[Laurenfra]

First of all you were not off topic. I also think you had the right idea Perceived rewards. But yet then why do we not quit smaoking or doing drugs when we know how harmful it is? hmmm

[Laurenfra]

I wanted to add this. I am not arguing with anyone or disagreeing, the whole point of this topic was to begin a discussion and maybe help some of us understand why we have our addictions. Not to cause anyone distress :hug

[Reveal]

Hmmm...

I'll start by saying that while I have never smoked or had an addiction to drugs or alcohol, I am now and have always been a Compulsive Overeater, though I didn't even know what that was, or that I WAS that person until a year ago. My first memory is of waking up in the middle of the night to eat all of the powdered cake mix in my twin sister's Easy Bake Oven. I think I was four. :sarcasm

As for why we continue to do things that we know will harm us, I can speak only for myself, but it's because in my case the "harm" is never as immediate as the reward.

The harm for being COE is obesity, diabetes, or heart disease among other things. And yes, it makes me feel guilty immediately afterward, but those are FUTURE feelings or problems. When I am ready to binge, I am thinking only about the immediate present. At 28, I'm thankful that I do not have diabetes or any of the other diseases associated with COE and obesity (at least I don't think ensive ) so the immediate feeling that needs to be squashed with food is always more pressing. Obsessions or compulsions don't respond to logic in that way. I've known for years that all I needed to do to stop overeating was "get a hold of myself or have some will power" but feeling that way or being told that by parents/others was entirely counterproductive and did nothing but make me feel guilty or resentful, which then fed the compulsion (if you'll pardon the pun).

I don't think there is any ONE reason for everyone. I think our compulsive or obsessive habits and problems stem from different issues for every individual.

Thanks! Great topic. :yes

[Laurenfra]

Two cases in point
#1 Man smokes his whole life. 50+ years. Developes Emphasima has an episode where he almost dies, He gets angry at himself and swears off cigs. Begs God to help me get thru withdrawl. 3 weeks later feeling great about himslf and breathing better then he has in almost 10 years buys a pack.

Case # 2 man looses wife and business due to alcohol,looses wife #2 and 2 step children to alcohol. Goes into forced rehab in able to see his son again. 15 years later is married to wife #3 with 4kids. Wife loves him but he is about to loose her and kids yet again due to alcohol. He stayes off it 2 months before he thinks he can control having just 1, then just 2 and now drinks excessively.

You get the point. It is said you need to reach the lowest possibel point to get a hold of an addiction. Believe me when I say these men hit the bottom.

Why do they continue?

[sillygirl]

Well said. It's so true that everyone hits 'bottom' before recovering. The bottom is where denial can no longer survive. AND the bottom is different for everyone. We're all here now, right? This is a great place to be!

[G-Mom]

I think we become addicted to things to escape a bit from our overly stressful lives. One hour of blissful high where you feel so good that thinking of all those stressful matters is just not a priority. Who would want to say no to that?

We are typically an unhealthful, unenergetic and time-pressed people in general, so we naturally seek out the easiest, fastest and least tiring form of escape. If we were all concerned for our health as a top priority, we would get off our butts and exercise for that high, but generally, we aren't that disciplined.

I have always thought of addictions as something we start because we are too stressed out with the way we live. Even someone who is retired, and doesn't have a lot to do, who becomes addicted to say, alcohol, is doing it because of the stress of being bored and he wants to escape that. This is my opinion.

[MontanaRebel]

Don't know if it was mentioned but doing something over and over again over a long period of time with no break in the routine will definately cause and addiction and doesn't matter what it may be.

I have an addiction to diet coke and drank a case every two days or less. Funny thing since I just started Atkins I have not wanted a diet coke but I take L-glutamine for curbing carbs hunger and it is working great.

Talking about addictions, when my wife had cancer and was having chemo treatments we noticed an older man outside sitting on a picnic table smoking a cigeratte and had the IV pole out there with him while having treatment....Go figure!!! That is an addiction and did not make sense at all!