
I am in such a weird place lately, I don't even know what to do with myself. I jump from mood to mood, with no warning. And yes, of course I know that's pretty normal for pregnancy, but I don't think that makes it any less stressful (oh my poor husband!)
The worst part, for me, has been attempting to forge a pregnancy diet that I can keep under control. Once I found out I was pregnant, I knew I had to get out of ketosis and out of the weight loss phases of Atkins, but I couldn't find any step by step instructions on how to do that CORRECTLY. Since I didn't have time to do the slow OWL steps of adding foods or food groups a week at a time and learn how I respond to them, I found myself plunged instantly into eating fruits, brown rice, whole grain bread, and TRYING to do what I envisioned was still a healthy diet and "maintenance"-like, but I didn't do the steps to get there, so it was far from ideal.
As soon as I started down that path, my metabolism went completely haywire. Cravings started instantly, and they were more powerful than any I'd ever had or imagined. I found myself hungry ALL the time, wanting something to eat from the moment I woke up each day, almost constantly until about 4:00/5:00pm, when I would suddenly stop wanting anything at all. My diet snowballed fast from pseudo-"best guess"-sensible to downright criminal. I have been as out of control as a person can get, and I'm beyond upset and frustrated about it. Foods I've had over the past 2 weeks include: sugar coated doghnuts, coca-cola, Mountain Dew, Chef boy-ar-di beef ravioli, toffee covered popcorn, cookies, ice cream, coke floats, whole bags of microwave popcorn, corn chips, potato chips and dip, hersheys kisses, chocolate milk, and much more.
Not too surprisingly, I feel like absolute crap. I started this pregnancy at my smallest weight in 11 years, and feeling healthier and more energetic than I have in 15+. But right now I'm up 15 pounds from that low weight, and my energy is NON-EXISTENT. I feel like going back to sleep as soon as I wake up (and frequently I do). I nap constantly, and even still I can't stay awake past 8:00 or 9:00 at night. Now I KNOW that a lot of fatigue is common in pregnancy, especially early on, but I also know that my eating is undoubtably having a hugely negative impact on this.
The worst part is how out of control I feel. I've always been an "ALL OR NOTHING" person, and my inability to go all the way with healthy Atkins eating has left me not knowing what to do. I have struggled and failed miserably (so far) to find a happy medium that is sustainable and works for me. I know how to eat correctly for Atkins induction, and how to succeed at that with ease, but since I can't do induction while pregnant, I feel completely and totally out of control of my eating and my body for the first time since I started this way of life in January, and I find myself do frustrated and depressed about it that I probably only make matters worse.
Another complication seems to be that when I get hungry, I get hungry NOW, IMMEDIATELY, without warning of any kind. SO even on days when I have had the BEST intentions of getting myself back on track, I find myself grabbing the nearest food I can find when the hunger hits, because I simply can't wait long enough to cook an omelette or throw together a salad. Wow, I know what an excuse that sounds like, but it's truly how it SEEMS at the time, as illogical as it is.
IS there a resource out there specifically targeted to pregnant women who want to stay with Atkins in whatever form is possible, because they know this to be the most healthy way of eating for ANYONE?
Any advice, motivational speeches, tough love, or words of wisdom will be much appreciated. In any case, thanks for putting up with the whine, I feel a little better having gotten this off my chest.



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