Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

[cleochatra]

Especially as you guys are slimming down. Are people treating you differently?

How do you feel about that?

[softnred]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

People are nicer and more friendly, but I can't say for sure that it's because I'm skinnier. It could very well be a result of my increased self confidence....

~JoAnne

[fr1endly2]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

JOANNE...i feel the same way as you.
BUT i too feel thats cause i have more self confidence
and probably smile more now!

GO FIGURE!

LISA

[Mary-chan]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

People I don't know actually TALK to me now, instead of trying to pretend that I don't exist. I used to think this was a matter of self-confidence but it really isn't. I have always enjoyed just striking up a conversation with people, but at my highest weight, I felt totally invisible. Nobody would even want to make eye contact with me really.

It wasn't me, It was them. I am the same person inside I have always been, but now people will actually come up to me and talk to me, or smile at me. Even people in my extended family.

I told my fiance about this (he has lost 40 pounds at the same time I have), and he can see it going on to him to. People at work that barely ever spoke to him are all acting more friendly towards him now.

It really drives me insane and makes me want to scream!

[LOWCARBINCLEVELANDOH]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

I was an active member of NAAFA (National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance) for a few years. FAT hatred is the last acceptable prejudice in this world. It is pefectly fine in most states for employers and landlords to discriminate against someone "of size".

Sure, we are all fighting against it..but it's the condition that is bad..not the people.

Some of the brightest, funniest, most talented folks I know are big. And some of them are ashamed to leave their houses because of how they have been treated.

We all have problems, the fortunate people are the ones whose issues are not so noticeable.

On a personal note, I believe that my attitude and my courage gets me thru every day when I am scoffed at by people. I know that I am doing the right thing for myself, and the odd thing is that when I am on Atkins and exercising,I don't notice the scoffing as much.

[Momtofour]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

I have always been a confident, smiley, happy person and I can definately tell that people are treating me differently since losing 49 pounds. I don't understand it, but it happens.

[LOWCARBINCLEVELANDOH]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

PS...Did anyone see Jay McGraw (Dr Phil's son)'s experiment last week? He dressed up as an overweight nerdy guy and went to a mall. they filmed him going into the stores and showed how people reacted to him..or pretended he wasn't there. He said after awhile he actually FELT bad about himself.. and he know he could take the whole suit off.

Yeah, Jay...imagine a lifetime of that.

I also noticed that he is engaged to a supermodel.....Kinda funny,huh?

[Mary-chan]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

I was an active member of NAAFA (National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance) for a few years. FAT hatred is the last acceptable prejudice in this world. It is pefectly fine in most states for employers and landlords to discriminate against someone "of size".

Well stated! People seem to think it's okay to prejudice us because "we can do something about it". It seems to be more acceptable to be a drug addict or alcoholic in this society then it is to be overweight.. Makes no sense to me.

[dreamof145]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

Yes, the change is amazing since losing 100 pounds. But I think the person who discriminated against me the most was me. I judged myself and assumed that others were judging me because of my size.

I know I am happier now, but I think I am allowing myself to be happier. I'm sure that some of it was others attitude towards me because I was fat...but I'm sure I also played a big part in the way I was treated.

[Isabeau]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

Interesting thread. I've noticed a difference too and I agree that it's partly becaue of my own esteem and confidence.

[brabea22]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

Well, I am one of those people that refused to leave my house because I was just too emotionally run down from the constant stares and whispers behind cupped hands.

I am one of many (I'm sure) who was born fat and just got bigger as time passed. It was such a vicious cycle as I made my way through school. People poked fun and were generally arses to me because I was the size I was, I got depressed, and I turned to food, and as I got bigger because of the out of control eating, they picked on me more.

I don't have many fond memories of growing up because children can be SOOO much meaner than adults about size. By the time I became a teenager I was a psychological mess. I began cutting regularly (like every three days) and basically shut down to my parents and everyone else.

It has taken me a long time and a lot of soul searching to overcome the cruelty that I endured for being big. I put down the razorblade, and I tried to put my life back together. I thought that with an increased self-esteem, I would be treated differently, but sadly it hasn't come yet. I can honestly say now that having lost so much weight and feeling better than I have in years that I really don't care about them anymore. It isn't worth my time to deal with stupid people.

[Momtofour]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

(((HUGS))) Brandon Please come to this board anytime you need validation that you are worth it. You will lose weight, but not for them. It will be for you and your future.

[Brook]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

When I was fat? The discrimination was awful. People treated me like I was invisible, but it worked out well for me for the most part because I wanted to be. The name calling, the rude noises (moooooooooo!), etc were awful when I went out. It never ceased to amaze me how horrible people can be to someone they don't know based solely on what they see.

Now that I'm a "normal" size? I still get discriminated against, only now when it happens it's generally by heavy people. Imagine that. I go out to the mall or go to the club and I will catch nasty looks or be called names.

Something happened just this weekend that made me think about this very subject.

I met this lady at the club I go dancing at about 3 months ago. She had a man be nasty to her and tell her he wasn't "attracted to fat chicks", and she was venting to me about it. I told her I understood exactly how she felt & that I hated it for her, but told her not to let some butthead define her like that. She looked at me, rolled her eyes and told me I couldn't possibly have a clue as to how she felt. For a second I was really taken aback. You should have seen the look on her face when I said, "You know?! You just discounted me the same way that obnoxious man discounted you. You made a judgement about me - knowing absolutely nothing about me - based solely on my size. I'm wondering how that makes you any different than the man you're angry at?" Of course I went on to tell her that I've lost a significant amount of weight - so yes - I really *do* understand. It was an interesting conversation to say the least.

People do treat me differently since I lost the weight. I think it's natural, I really do - and I'm not sure if it has so much to do with other people's perception of me or my perception of myself and what I put out there in the world. I used to walk into rooms looking at my feet and avoiding any/all eye contact and acknowledgement I could. Now when I walk into a room I find I smile at everyone, make eye contact with everyone and am just generally more approachable.

I do, however, find that men tend to take me less seriously now than they did when I was heavy - and I find that I have to remind them (obviously in social settings) that my eyes are on my face and not on my chest or on my butt.

Interesting stuff, really.

LowCarbInCleveland- I'd be interested to know why you're not still a member of NAAFA and what your experiences are within the organization. I have a friend that's a member of NAAFA - or should say I "had" a friend. Remarkably, her hatred of diets and those of us that have lost weight strongly resembles the very discrimination she's so actively fighting against. I found it interesting. Obviously I don't think her attitude is representative of those in NAAFA, but I'm interested to hear your experiences

[Bugaboo]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

I'm in the same boat as Brook. Heavier women who used to be nice to me, like at the grocery store, are now very distant...like it tees them off that I lost weight. On the other hand, thinner women are nice to me now like I've joined some secret club. What cheeses me off is now that I've lost weight people just come out and ask me what size I am or how much I weigh. (eta~except when asked here at ADBB) Like I'm suddenly not self concious anymore. I share things here at this board that I share with nobody else except my husband. My personality really hasn't changed except I have more self confidence but I'm still very critical of myself.

(((Brandon))) I used to cut myself as a teenager, you can pm me anytime.

[wannabethintoo]

Re: Do you ever feel discriminated against due to weight?

I haven't noticed any difference. People treat me the same way as always. I think it has a lot to do with your attitude and self-confidence. Mine never changed just because I gained some weight.