VERY interesting article especially to us CCers

[penelope]

http://newyorkmetro.com/nymetro/health/features/11958/

This article talks about the psychological struggles of losing 100 or more lbs. I know it deals with "the surgery" but it is still relevant to us century club members. Read it and comment. What do you think it will be like for you at goal? Or if you are there, what has changed? I am sure this topic has been touched on before but the article is interesting.

[Kent]

Interesting article... Perhaps the changes in women is serious different or just more exaggerated in the article because this tendency to leave your spouse I don't see or feel it. I do believe that a person who has been dedicated to lose a lot of weight will probably not accept some of the crap that was formerly accepted (perhaps because they felt they weren't worthy of anything better). Here's to accepting spouses and growing closer rather than further away as the pounds drop.

[only4d]

That article was VERY interesting -- thank you for posting the link.

I had some kind of emotional reactions to it, imagining what I'll feel like. I'm afraid of losing all my weight, I know that. I've become comfortable with thoughts like men don't want to date obese women, employers don't want to hire obese employees. I've gotten confident enough to ask for that seatbelt extension w/o blushing or flinching anymore. I don't worry very much about being noticed by anyone, I'm used to being invisible. What if I'm not anymore?

That sounds kind of pathetic. those thoughts are direclty in conflict with how much I want the body I see in my mental self-image -- not when I imagine myself after losing weight, but just when I think of myself in general. I STILL get surprised in the mirror, I STILL wonder sometimes how I let myself get to this stage. I want to run again, I want to take dancing lessons, I want DF to get his arms alll the way around me.

I don't want to become obsessed with how I look, with how my body looks. I'm already too obsessive about that stupid scale (which is going in the closet under a pile of junk as soon as I've typed this message). I don't want to start worshipping my body.

On the other hand, I REALLY want to go shopping in the "regular sizes" department, I really want to wear cute clothes, I really want to own a nice suit for work that looks good on me and makes me look competent, not ill-fitting and makes me aware of my weight.

I want to walk down the hallway and not smash myself against the wall out of someone's way, figuring there isn't room for both of us. I want to sit on the airplane and not crowd my neighbor.

I fear that instead of praising God for my thin body, I'll praise my thin body.

Anyway, thanks a lot for posting that. It's good for me to thnk about this --- even though my loss is very slow, the time will come.

[goin2Bgood]

I enjoyed this article too, thank-you for posting it. I'm so grateful I'm on Atkin's, and that I did not choose surgery for my weight loss journey.

[cleochatra]

To me it was an advertisement for the procedures of weight loss surgery, and I had a very difficult time getting past that. I did really relate to one of the ladies interviewed, however.

She said something akin to "at least when you're overweight you can blame the fat girl for what went wrong".

That's my biggest problem. It's easy to blame everything on my weight. What if, as a thin person, I have to accept responsibility? I've never been grand at rejection of any kind.

[LyssaRene]

Ty for the link, very interesting reading.

I have been doing a lot of self reflecting about a ton of things in life since starting Atkins. I have a lot going on personally so I know it is from that part of my life as well.

I have 2 friends who have had the surgery. One the by pass and the other the lap band. 2 complete different results with their weight loss. However, nothing mental ever changed. My personal opinion of watching them go through it and down the road of losing the weight is.. it happened so fast they had no time to reflect and figure out the emotions that go along with it. They found the answer to being fat --- surgery. No effort (although it is painful) but.. no self dedication, no self respect, no taking the responsibility. I think when you truly dig down and realize the why's... then you can fix it. They had the surgery and poof life went on as usual. They didn't seek a support board like here that has helped me through a lot of thoughts. The fears, the OMG I am going to fail and everything else everyone posts around here. I just sit and read some times to get refocused.

Anyway.. enough of my rambling. Thanks again for the link to it.

[brabea22]

I am going to agree with kent on this one. Though I totally do not know what is in store for me as the pounds and inches slough off, I think you would have to admit that it is strange that you would love your spouse when you are large but not when you are small.

My wife loves me very much and proves that love to me everyday. When I am feeling lousy because the blasted scale is being evil, she is there to pick me up and tell me how much I have lost and how far I have come already. She is a gorgeous woman, inside and out, and I know she could have her pick of fellas if she wanted, but she picked me.

She has stuck through me through all this, and unless Gods wishes it to be otherwise, she will reap the rewards when I am smaller, healthier, and more active.

Thanks for posting this. It is nice to step back and think about that end goal so far down the road.

[maribelle]

Ok, I know this article was trying to make a point, but I think it was really sad in a way. I hope when I lose weight, and become hopefully very lovely, I don't forget the man who put up with me no matter what I looked like. He has never made a derogatory remark about my weight, or ever shown in anyway a distaste for me. If I start acting differant because I'm thinner, and stick my nose up in the air because all of a sudden he's not good enough for me, or something like that, than I deserve for him to turn his back on me. I wouldn't deserve him. Thats my opinion. I don't know, there are alot of people here who have lost over 100 pounds, and none of them seem to think they need to leave their loved ones in the dust. I just found it pretty depressing. It is funny though. I was just thinking tonight about my sister in laws, some of which definitely enjoy to some extent that fact that even though they are quite overweight themselves, they're no where near what I weigh. I wonder how they will react when I pass them up. Hopefully they will remember how much I love them, rather than how much I weigh.

[siscaboo1512]

Thanks for the link very interesting article.

[Sarah_K]

Thanks for posting the link. It was a very interesting article.

On the spouse/partner issue, I think partnerships that are based on love and trust will weather 100 lbs of weight loss just fine. (I was at 309, my heaviest, when I met my dear sweetie, and we're still going strong 7+ years and 118- pounds later.)

Losing weight is a big change, and it can be stressful, just like taking a new job, buying a new house, having a child, or any other big change. Good partnerships survive those changes. Partnerships with a lot of fear and distrust don't weather those changes nearly as well.

My $.02...