I'm not sure if this is the right place to post...

[AtkinsLegit]

I have such a fear of losing weight...as soon as I start to feel good about myself when I'm eating right and excercising...all of a sudden I panic and get scared about being noticed and not hiding behind the fat that I sabotage myself and binge....it's so frustrating because I tell myself that more than anything I want to be healthy and feel good about myself...but it seems that my actions are directly contradictory because as soon as I start to feel confident I also start to feel vulnerable and me + vulnerable = easier to run away from those uncomfortable feelings by stuffing my face with food rather than dealing with the issues and allowing myself to be okay with being attractive and confident...in other words this leads to cyclical behavior of like a month of doing really well...but then as soon as I get to a certain weight and the idea that I could possibly reach my goal becomes a more tangible reality I sabotage...and the thing that I hate so much is that it is all MENTAL...because I have no cravings and am completely satisfied eating the atkins way...but time and time again I let my feelings direct my actions rather than actually listening to my body...sorry I just had to get that off my chest...tomorrow is day 1 for me after falling off the wagon for 5 days HARDCORE...I mean I probably ate my weight times 500 in food...bleh so gross!! Oh and go figure tomorrow is my birthday...so I figure the best present I can give myself is to forgive myself and stop dwelling on past behaviors and use this opportunity to examine the mental obstacles between me and my goal before I give up on myself and resort to binge eating...okay that's all sorry guys for the vent! I will keep you posted (whether you like it or not! hehe) as a means os holding myself accountable to sticking to this way of eating...alrighty hope everyone is having a great night and happy July!

[Desertthorn]

Well, let me tell you, you are at least in very good company here and AND we all understand every word that your saying.
Glad you joined, and when things are going wrong, just tell yourself "baby steps" or just come here and vent. We are all good listeners.
Lynne

[Finelly]

Oh, gosh, you are starting tomorrow and this board will be down all day Friday and part of Saturday!

I will pm you my email address (and others could do the same, hint hint) so that you have some support !