Unsupportive people

[Kittie]

Hi everyone,

well, I suppose I'm officially a STAC member now, and some very friendly people in Extended Induction referred me to you guys. In short, I'm restarting induction after several months of having fell off, and am really looking forward to spending time here!

I'm posting this thread because it's the end of day one and I already have an issue with people being unsupportive. This person in particular is a guy who is currently living at our house. He's my sister's boyfriend.

I was making some low-carb desserts; (cream-cheese clouds, if you will), and he commented, telling me it looked very fattening. Assuming he was simply ignorant of the way Atkins worked, I explained to him why just about every other "snack" in the kitchen was much more fattening.

We got into an argument, with him telling me that I was just looking for an excuse to eat things that were unhealthy. I found myself getting extremely pissed off at this guy; who is he to tell me these things when he had just eaten a pint of Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey ice cream earlier that day?

I'm trying not to let it get to me, but it's really bothering me. Every time he sees me cooking something in the kitchen or even randomly, he'll bring up how ridiculous this "fattening diet" is. What would you do if you were in my position?

[Desertthorn]

Re: Unsupportive people

You know there are always going to be folks who are negative. Let me see, Atkins is going to give you kidney disease, Atkins is dangerous, Atkins was fat when he died. It all bogus, but Kittie you just cant argue with these people cause they parrot things they have heard and really don't know what they are talking about.
2big just told folks she was allergic to carbs, something like that and thats all you need to do, he is getting your goat and probably is enjoying the argument more than worrying about your diet. Ignore him
Glad you found STAC, we are a great group. Besure to measure cause thats important here, and you'll have a great time.

[psigna]

Re: Unsupportive people

Tell him to mind his own business.

[Laurenfra]

Re: Unsupportive people

If you care what he thinks let him ready your DANDR if you dont then blow him off as let the diet speak for its self as you become the skinnier you

[Terry]

Re: Unsupportive people

"Bite Me" comes to mind but Im sure that isnt all that productive in the long run.

Desert said it much better.

One problem is that all these years we have been bombarded with low fat ideas and when someone looks at the ingredients in say, the clouds .... all they see is how much fat is in it. Which goes against what we have been taught. They dont understand the whole concept of low carb and how it works.

My dh supports me one hundred percent but sometimes he sees me eat something like cream cheese and says "I thought that stuff was fattening". So every once in a great while I have to remind him how this all works. There are just times that a little education is all that is needed.

Im not sure that tactic will work for you .....

I just went back and re read your post. "Bite me" still comes to mind. LOL But the better option would be to just agree to disagree and your point will be made in spades once you begin to lose weight and prove him wrong. Then be sure to sashay by him and gloat.

[Weighless]

Re: Unsupportive people

Welcome to STAC Kittie! Unsupportive people are no fun to be around....I know...not sure I can think of one person around me that is. Either their offering me food they know I can't eat or trying to explain how bad this diet is for me.....I've just learned to tune them out. In one ear and out the other. And smiling as they are trying to give me their X-large clothes as they do not fit them anymore (too small) and explaining that I appreciate the offer...but I no longer can wear those sizes as they fall off me.

LOL @ Terry ....very similar to what I was thinking...only you were a bit nicer!

[Natasha]

Re: Unsupportive people

Kittie!

I have had to deal with people just like this and its pure ingnorance that makes people do this. People who do not understand atkins or don't take the time to understand ....basically think they know it all....These people you ignore...you can't tell them anything....and until they open their mind...they will 4ever be ignorant.

The best way to prove these people wrong it to show them better than you can tell them. Let this HATER be your MOTIVATOR! So everytime he says something ignorant to you about atkins or what your eating, use that to run 1 more mile, use that to not have that donut, use that in place of those cravings....And when you have met your goal and lost weight, walk past him with those same cream cheese clouds and say " Oh Im sorry what was it you had to say about my snack, Jackass."

Never let someone steal your joy.....they should never have that much control over your emotions....

Good Luck Kittie....We are all here rooting for you.....We definetly love you here.....

[Terry]

Re: Unsupportive people

This thread also got me to thinking about the conference I attended last week. It was all about nutrition and there was one speaker who brought up "that Atkins diet".

UGH

She actually said.... "It does work! I even used it to lose weight myself but it does not work in the long run". I have to say in the middle of about 100 or so people I kept my mouth shut and chalked it up to ignorance. She is a specialist in child nutrition. But that said she does not know it all. You dont go on "the diet" (Atkins), lose weight and keep it off when you go back to eating like you always did. It is a lifestyle and for some reason they dont get it.

One of the classes was on the new food pyramid. And as I was listening I realized that when you reach maintenance with Atkins you are actually doing basically the very same thing that they are telling us to do with their new food pyramid. Whole grains, good carbs, moderate fats intake, not eating processed items.

Other than that first key note speaker I did spend a lot of time explaining why I eat low carb and how it works for me. And giving many benefits that I have experienced myself not just read in a book. Was also pretty well recieved.

[2big4mysize]

Re: Unsupportive people

well, you can really get him to shut up by telling him you are really interested in seeing the literature he has read and the supporting medical research that supports that position that having your cloud snakc is fattening. then next time he brings it up say oh have you brought me that liturature thanks! soon he will not even mention it.
Or you could DR Phil him and say I really need your help to stay on my Atkins when my own will power is faultering and inorder for you to assist me I need you to understand how the plan works. Thank you for being part of my healthy eating support network. Here is a copy of the book twith all the medicak studies to support this WOL and lists with the actual foods I can and can't have. When you see me about to consume something not allowed for my phase would you pleace help me stick with new new healthier eating plan. Thanks I know I can count on you for your support and help in this. Then go back to what you were doing.
Nobody wants to say NO I ain't going to help you! and he will be on the spot forced to read DANDR or else stay away from you whenever you are near food since without knowledge of the plan he would be a support failure! LOL


Oh I forgot the more witnesses you have for the second approach the better.

[Finelly]

Re: Unsupportive people

What a fantastic list of possible responses! I can't think of anything to add except that when the weight loss starts to show, you will be able to smile a cat-like smile and say nothing at all!

[knicknack]

Re: Unsupportive people

I've learned that there's just no arguing with those people. I just go on with my life, and if they're around enough they see me exercising and eating veggies and whatnot and eventually they shut up. Luckily nowadays people don't seem to think that 'low carb' is that bad, it's ATKINS that they disagree with. I find this odd since it's not that different really. *rolls eyes*

[Terry]

Re: Unsupportive people

Low carb is more pc than Atkins out there. It was OK to say you are cutting out processed foods and carbs at the nutrition classes but to say that A word got lots of "those" looks. go figure

[Starmaker]

Re: Unsupportive people

I second the BITE ME comment, as well as a whack on the head with the DANDR book. Seems fitting somehow......

[Devi]

Re: Unsupportive people

Last night I was out with my partner visiting with his sister and her friend. I had decided not to order anything to snack on at that pub, because there really wasn't anything Atkins appropriate, and I wasn't really all that hungry anyway. Now, my boyfriend is 100% supportive of my diet and has done his best to understand how and why it works. But his sister and her friend, who are both veterinarians (sp?), started saying that they would never go on Atkins because it just seems ignorant to go on the same diet that is causing thier grandfathers and fathers to die of heart diease and high cholesterol. I started to try to explain that you actually are eating carbs on Atkins, and that the carbs mostly come from fresh veggies and that I was eating a much more balanced diet being on Atkins than I was before. And they just laughed and said something to the effect of "that's what all the Dads say over thier steak right before they croak".

I just let it pass, although I was really upset about it. Luckily I hardly ever see them...and to tell the honest trust, the one that was giving me the hardest time about it is very heavy. Perhaps she was just being mean-spirited because of her own issues.

Oh well!

[Terry]

Re: Unsupportive people

Lots of uninformed people out there.