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  • I think I belong in here

    I've never ventured in here to the STAC, but after perusing some of the posts I think I need to spend some time in here.

    For those of you who don't know me (since I've been afraid to come in here) I am the king of falling off the wagon. I am the example of how not to do this plan. I start every day with good intentions and I slip somewhere during the day. Well my latest slip, turned into an 8 months slide. And I could not find my motivation. My wife found it for me, she said to me last week, "You forgot why you started this in the first place." And she was right. The reason I started this journey was to live long enough to see my kids grow up, and to walk my daughters down the aisle, and to teach my boys how to be men. But as I began to have success, I began to enjoy success. The ego feed from the compliments and attention was as addicting as any carb laden crap I was feeding myself. I loved the attention. And that was where I went wrong. I wasn't doing it to be able to watch my kids grow up I was doing it for purely egocentric reasons.

    Then the wheels fell off. My daughter was born and spent a month in the hospital, my eating became convenient, planning went out the window, but I maintained. Then a little of this and a little of that became a sleeve of chips ahoy and a tall glass of milk. Then the scale slapped me I had gained 10 pounds. So I tried to restart, lack of planning caused another 5 pound jump. The holidays came along and HELLO 300 pounds again. Holy crap! Did I just gain 25 pounds in 3 months? Yep! OK, now I'm really gonna restart. What? The scale is reading 310, when did that happen? Couple of days in, down to 304, ok back under 300 by the end of the weekend. Register for some races, that'll get me back on track. Right? Wrong! I am weak. 313 Enough. Restart. Fail. 315. Restart. Fail. 317 Done. And now here I am.

    One of the best tips I got since I came here was as I went into smaller clothes, get rid of the bigger ones. Best thing I ever did, because now I must wear what I own. They are tight but they are on and a couple of days in, (and three good training runs) they are not so tight.

    So I've refound my focus, and I remembered why I'm doing this, so I'm back on track. But talk is cheap so don't listen to what I say, I'll let my actions speak instead. This has been an interesting vacation back in the 300's, but 8 months is too long for any vacation. Besides I don't like it here and I want to go home.
    Jim


    Yes I'm eating a smore in the picture, how do you think I got so fat?
    M/41/6'2"
    Original Start 348 6/14/04 Low 275.2 9/13/2005
    Restart 338.0 2/5/10 ---Current 325.0 2/22/10---Goal 210(195?)

    February miles run - 20
    "It's very hard in the beginning to understand that the whole idea is not to beat the other runners. Eventually you learn that the competition is against the little voice inside you that wants you to quit" - George Sheehan

  • #2
    Re: I think I belong in here

    Hi Jim!

    If you saw my post a little ways down you'll know I did pretty much the same thing and am back here for the same reasons.

    We did it before, we can do it again. I was embarrassed to come in here too for quite some time but ADBB was such a tremendous source of support for me last time that I knew I had to come back.

    We're all cheerin you on in here.
    Female
    HW 180?
    165+ to 120 Jan -Aug 04
    Restart May 06 around 155?
    CW aprox 140.
    Goal:Maintaining a healthy 125-130

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    • #3
      Re: I think I belong in here

      Let me just say I feel your pain! I am sooooooooo guilty of the same crime! I was felling so good and loving the compliments, but I too starting this to live to see greatgrandchildren.
      I think we need to pick up the peices start again, and refocus. This time keeping our eyes on the center of that focus.
      You have to taken the first step honesty, and I am sure in no time at all you will be losing and feeling great, the compliments will start pouring in again, but this time just remember they are just an added benefit, keep a picture of your kids close for motivation.
      I think your great for letting everyone else see how some people can lose sight of what they are doing


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      • #4
        Re: I think I belong in here

        I am in the same neighborhood as you, driving around and not recognizing anything.
        I started back in 2003, lost 60 pounds before becoming pregnant with my daughter. When I was done nursing her, I was back up to my very start weight. I lost about 50 pounds before having surgery in December of 2005, and just couldn't get back on track. I tried WW (and failed miserably) before dedicating myself back to Atkins. I did great, lost 10 pounds, and was almost to ONEderland when I screwed up and it took me a few weeks to get back on track.
        I too have thrown out all my old clothes and refuse to buy any new bigger ones. It helps to remind me when I slip.
        In the midst of this we are selling our house, buying a new one, and moving to a new town an hour away. I injured my foot and can't exercise and that's hard on me. I am a much happier person when I exercise.
        We're all in this together.
        Susan, f age 35 5'4"
        Mom to
        Garrett, 8
        Brendyn, 5
        Hennessy, 20 months
        261/205.6/140
        3rd time around

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