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**pstansel** · August 27, 2006, 02:26 PM

Re: Not Committed This Time

It's difficult to realize that you're just not healthy. No one wants to see themselves that way. For me, I have no idea what the trigger was to restart. I just woke up one day and said "I'm sick of this, I'm going back on Atkins." For others it's a realization when they look in the mirror that they can't hide from themselves any longer. Still others use a before picture as motivation. It's one small step in a lifetime of steps. One meal at a time, one day at a time. Eventually it does become second nature.

**BiggestDawnEver** · August 27, 2006, 02:34 PM

Re: Not Committed This Time

I know. *sigh* One doctor, my primary, said, "You need to go on a low carb diet. It will help you." Another one said, "You need to go on the South Beach diet. It will help you." That was a month ago and last week, respectively. I guess I knew it all along, but you're right, I didn't want to admit how big and unhealthy I had let myself become.

Ah, before pictures. The last time someone took a picture of me, I deleted it from the memory card!

I guess you're right, I just have to go do it even if I don't feel like it, because I have to start somewhere, and maybe, just maybe, it will get easier as it goes on. I'm just wondering, since I'm totally not committed, will I be able to stick to induction?

**futurefitbabe** · August 27, 2006, 02:49 PM

Re: Not Committed This Time

I've been there!! You're definitely not the only one. It's a struggle. I've had people tell me that sticking to a "diet" is much harder than starting one... but I disagree! There have been a lot of times when I said I was going to start but just couldn't make myself. I guess maybe because I just didn't have enough faith. I think I just assumed that each time would be like the previous time... I'd do well for a while then blow it and quit. It's definitely a battle within your own mind, your own being. To be quite frank the reason I am doing so well "this time" is because I am asking God to help me. I've realized that I cannot do this in my own strength. Food addiction is just like any other addiction. You need to admit that you're powerless in the situation. (While still taking responsibility for your actions.) Seek God's strength- He will see you through... if you let Him. Also, keep coming to this board. It has helped me quite a bit. I haven't written much but have been greatly encouraged by reading what others post. I hope that you will find the courage and faith to get on track soon. I will pray be praying for you! God bless you! ~Christy

**Serenity Raging** · August 27, 2006, 02:50 PM

Re: Not Committed This Time

Its hard when you know you already lost the weight and then went and gained it back. It doesn't matter if you just stopped watching the carbs or if you gained it back due to illness. Its frustrating. I had lost 70 pounds only to put it back on due to medical problems. A couple of months ago i decided to start atkins again. But my heart wasn't in it. Now i guess, I feel that the extra weight isn't going to go until i make it go. I have only been back on atkins for a week now and I havent managed to lose a thing as of yet. But I do feel better. I feel as if i am in control of this part of my life. I agree with pstansel, you just wake up one day and decided to take back control. I dont think you can "make" yourself do it. Reading the boards here for a week before i started helped me the most. It was like seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I failed the first time but that is ok, this time is all that counts.

Serenity

**Outback Jess** · August 27, 2006, 03:39 PM

Re: Not Committed This Time

Everybody has been very understanding about this very difficult moment for you. The hardest step is the hardest, and that's the first few steps.
I want to encourage you where you will be in a few days. You will feel better than you have, you will be so proud of yourself. Once on the other side of any detox, things start to really perk up, you feel healthier, happier, and empowered, at the end of the first week. I am finishing up on week for. I have such a peace and calmness now that I am far away from sugar. If you have the DANDR book, chpt 4 goes over symptoms, check that out. I had soooooo many of those very unpleasant symptoms, my moodiness and exhaustion was constant. Couldn't stop eating every thing, could not move from being so over weight...depressed, angry, after a week I read to another test , look at pg 131 some of the symptoms that sugar causes go away quickly and others resolve slowly and then you remember that you cannot remember when you "felt that last"...
The general sense of well being is less than a week away. I suggest you get up and go to the store! Go buy what you need to get started. YOu CAN do this, we are all here to cheer you on, we are you, and you are us! WE all have to make that first step, it gets easier after you make it and get going. Keep coming and posting, we are here for you...

**Brook** · August 27, 2006, 05:01 PM

Re: Not Committed This Time

For me it's best summed up like this:

"When the pain of change is less than the pain of staying the same, you'll do what needs to be done."

It rings true in every area of my life. When you're truly ready to take this on, you'll do it and you'll be unstoppable.

You are many things in this endeavor, but alone is not one of them, my friend.

**BiggestDawnEver** · August 27, 2006, 10:44 PM

Re: Not Committed This Time

OK, I went to the store and bought my veggies. You have all offered very solid and helpful advice that I will re-read again and again in the next few days. I can't believe how understanding everyone has been...I am humbled and touched.

Brook, you are so right. That's the reason I finally got treatment for my depression. I had been depressed for six months, and finally, it was just too painful to stay where I was mentally and I knew something had to change, so I finally made a doctor's appointment. I am still on that road, but I am glad every day that I made that first phone call.

I know in a short while I will also be glad I went to the store tonight to get my veggies and protein! Yes, I will skip to those chapters tonight. I started re-reading DANDR again because of the many many posts here that said, over and over, READ THE BOOK.

Thank you all so very much for your kindness, compassion, and understanding. You have already helped me more than you know.

Dawn

**Lady_Hawke** · August 27, 2006, 11:10 PM

Re: Not Committed This Time

I did Atkins the first time in 2004 - was doing awesome and then fell off the wagon and had a he11 of a time climbing back on and staying there.
I'd restart and fall, restart and fall, restart and fall - that happened on and off for 2 years.
This past July 9th - it "clicked" for me and I have been clean since and riding the Atkins wagon.
Some people can hop on the wagon and have no problem staying. Some hop on and off before it "clicks" again - the main thing is to not ever give up on yourself. Always believe in yourself and it will "click" for you.
In the meantime - we are all here to support and encourage you

I know you can do it! And I know that it will "click" for you!

**Outback Jess** · August 28, 2006, 02:54 AM

Re: Not Committed This Time

Gurrrrlllll,
I am so proud of you, you are moving, tha's the hardest part, getting up and moving. First we move our brain, then our mouth, then our legs eventually start going in the direction. This week will be hard to get going, but oh so incredibly worth what waits on the other side, later in the week. Remember how good you have felt away from those sugars. I can't tell you, the mental and emotional health I am in and the sense of well being. This is going to be a challenging week, come here often, find passages in the book that describe what you so desire...The difference is asounding!!!
YOu are awesome Dawn, and I am sooo proud of you

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