Follow through

[abstractillusions]

Today is November 15, 2006 and i made some bad choices today. On some level i feel like i gave up, on another level i feel i didn't catch myself fast enough when i started to fall. I can't think of one excuse to make anything sound reasonable, i knew exactly what i was doing when i did it. I had choices and i chose the wrong ones.

I gave up my exercise tonight (i was dressed and everything) decided not to go, so i could come home and watch the biggest loser, which turned out to be putzed anyway. While doing so i ironically made another bad choice and orders a large pizza with double sausage, double pepperoni and black olives and cheese. I didn't even ask for light sauce or no sauce like i usually do.

So what do i do i asked myself. i am sitting here at the edge of a principe and i am wondering how to restablish the balance i know i need to strive, to reach, and maintain my goals. Not only on my weight loss but in everything that means to me. The aspects of the whole and not that parts. The determination and persistence to follow through. i remember in almost everything i have ever did from sports, to music, to friends and family, the most constant aspect of success i have had with all of that was follow through. So i have been contemplating what does follow through mean to me in regards to this journey.

Follow through means in this journey not stopping short, to allow the momentum to lead you into the next step, to allow the yourself to complete the whole aspect instead of thinking you are finished simply because another concept has entered the whole.

It took me many many many many hours of shooting a basketball over and over and over to realize that the follow through is the most important part of the shot. I always stopped short and would get so frustrated when my shots were off, until i learned follow though. The follow through got me what i wanted, trip to State, a college scholarship etc. I was fine as long as i followed through.

So i need to concentrate on my follow through. I made bad choices today and stopped short of a follow through. So what am i going to do, my fingers are positioned, the knowledge i have, i know where the basket is, so the question is am i going to follow through.

Yes, even if i have to reiterate it over and over, time after time, when it gets repetative and when it will make me scream. Follow through will allow the momentum to get me through days when i am gravitating towards bad choices, my follow through will carry me through to the good choices instead.

[ValidRouge]

Re: Follow through

Sher, Sounds like youve got yourself under control over there. Good for you for coming here and sharing it with us, allowing us to help you.

Exercise. I am learning to love exercise. But, I know that if I don't keep up the momentum, that I backslide VERY quickly. I skipped yesterday. All I had at the end of the night was an excuse. I didn't have any of those "results" that I want so badly.

I think I'm going to try a new approach. On the nights that I don't "feel" like exercising...I'm going to tell myself "Ok, tonight all you have to do is 5 minutes."

If I can get myself up and out the door and 5 minutes into a workout, I know I'm going to keep going. It's the getting up and going that's the hard part. Someone posted today about riding a bike uphill, that if you stop, it's real hard to start up again.

Anyway, I understand where you are tonight. So, next time you don't feel like it, do you think you can get 5 minutes out of yourself???

[cathyjobob]

Re: Follow through

I find what you had to say about "follow through" poignant and impressive...
You stood back from the precipice...it was only one occurence and not a complete backslide! Kudos! You know already what you need...you sound like you have a good, square head on your shoulders...

Valid Rouge's advice is very good...I think I too will implement the "5 min. rule"...

You'll be a'ight kid
Don't beat yourself up.....

[Outback Jess]

Re: Follow through

Sher, Now you know what could happen if you PASS on the exercise...There is something so daunting about exercise at times, and it is a big choice that has in this case put you in a place where you increased your risk of making a bad food choice...
There is much to hold on to here...Yes, get up and work very hard to get yourself back in to ketosis and exercise to get those endorphines really going, but HOLD ON TO WHAT you have LEARNED HERE...SO you can FOLLOW THROUGH...
Great truth for all of us here, thanks for sharing it.

[RachelnLa]

Re: Follow through

How to say this... I don't have such a good way with words all the time.

We learn from our mistakes. What does not kill us makes us stronger!

Mistakes remind us of where we are headed and makes us ask how bad we really want it. It also shows us the not so greener grass on the other side.

Before atkins you were miserable. Miserable enough to seek out a change. You started the change. Too hard? Is it working? Why cannot I have my old lifestyle back too? It was a comfort zone. You falter and sway.. oh! You learn just how bad the old way was and just how much improvement the new way gave. It's all about learning! You learned some valuable lessons Chin up and move on

[Ante_up]

Re: Follow through

Cher I'm glad you were able to pull yourself back up and strong enough to make the changes you need to in order to follow through. You can do it girl keep the momentum going.

[abstractillusions]

Re: Follow through

Thanks everyone, i don't really understand why i have been in such a funk, and i knew i had to acknowledge what i deliberately did yesterday and it all came down to follow through. I appreciate all of your words of encouragement.

[RachelnLa]

Re: Follow through

Sher, it's all new and we cannot expect to be perfect 100% of the time. That's what got me the weight I am! It takes time to change old habits. Each time I have that down moment I think about how I got there, how to avoid it and how to quickly get up again. I try not to wallow in the feelings of letting myself down. heck, some days are just harder than others! I figure they all balance out. The longer I do Atkins, I see where I get snagged and need to change things. I try and learn..I move on.

{{{Sher}}}

[abstractillusions]

Re: Follow through

Hi Rachel, Thanks for your words. What's funny is i am not upset about what i chose to do yesterday, i did it, lol its done, now today is a new day. In a way i almost feel like i told myself if you do this (i knew what i was doing unfortunately and just didn't care) tomorrow you don't wallow. So i am not wallowing today thankfully over my bad choices yesterday. i acknowledged it, i recognized it, and set the plan back in motion towards what i need to do, and i pinpointed how to hopefully deal with the next time. My funk has been around for about the last week lol and i am trying to figure out why so i can shake it. It kinda sucks when the funk isn't about something you can identify such as diet etc lol.

Thanks again.

[Outback Jess]

Re: Follow through

To all the newbies, don't try what Sher did...She did not follow through, she was in a funk, she knew what she was doing, she is not wallowing in it.

If I did what she did, I would not be here the day after...I would not have made it past breakfast, I would have headed right out after the breakfast that creeps into my imagination..and then there would have been lunch, and I would not be here, because I would have gone and ordered the very thing I still think about every so often!

I would not be here by now in the day, because I would either be sick...Incredibly depressed or sooo ashamed...Plus I am one of those, who would eat and not turn back from some time.

See I know I can't sit down and order a pizza, because it would only be the tip of the iceburg...I could not brush myself off the next day, and motor on....I know I am not the only one like that.

Sher is my friend, she is a wonderful writer, and she has a brilliant mind to have figured out what she needed to do! Sher might be able to come right back out of this. I personally hope she absolutely does....People I would not, I know this very well. I cannot afford to call out for pizza and survive it! I just wanted to get that off my chest.

[abstractillusions]

Re: Follow through

arches an eyebrow at Jess,

Jess i was not and never did advocate what i did, nor do i think i ever even implied what i did was the correct thing to do. What i did say was, yes i screwed up and i admitted it, i don't think you need to broadcast to newbies not to follow me as i don't think i advocated anything i did as the correct thing to do. I am trying to be honest here, i don't think your broadcast is called for, especially in a thread i started trying to own up to something i did.

i am glad you wanted to get that off your chest, but in all honesty you have just made me basically feel like crap when i have been very glad at the hard work i have put in TODAY getting back into gear and not letting my screw up of yesterday bring me down.

I am sorry i ever posted this.

[abstractillusions]

Re: Follow through

You know, i somehow feel like Jess feels i should apologize because of what i have written in this thread. Well it ain't going to happen. I am not going to apologize because after tons of work on myself i was able to get through what happened to me yesterday and the giving up without completely falling apart. I did do what i did, i am sorry i am not wallowing and falling apart and beating myself up and basically throwing in the towel as it seems like i was suppose to or somethintg. God forbid the newbies actually see someone DEAL with the situation like i had yesterday without falling apart and throwing in the towel.

Yes i made bad choices, i began this thread because of hindsight i had AFTER the damage was already done. I acknowledged that i deliberately did what i did. Anyone who ever says they don't deliberately cheat i will call a liar, because you know right from wrong, therefore, when you do something wrong you know it and that is considered deliberate.

Now for all you newbies out there... this thread touches on something other than the correct food to eat, the exercise, it goes beyond what i didn't do and it concentrates on what i am doing.

This way of life is just that a way of life, while doing so you will come across things where your attitude is what gets you through the day, not the food, not the exercise but your attitude. Your attitude is the follow through. THAT is why i wrote this thread. After i made bad choices it occured to me that i didn't follow through. That Jess wants to warn you away from the "actual doing of eating a pizza and not exercise," tells me she doesn't and never did GET what and why i wrote what i did.

I have to be honest not only with me, but with what i write here for writing here is simply my experience in my life. I was honest. This thread is in the Second Time Around forum for a reason. In the second time around, i am learning things i never considered the first time around. And this follow through was something that i recognized last night when i made bad choices.

I am not sure why Jess felt the need to "get that off her chest" my thread was written because I needed support, i needed to write something that others may have understood and to tell you the truth until Jess' last post, all the support i received was a major catalyst of putting it in perspective, acknowledging and moving ON, not dwelling on my bad choices, and instead concentrating on making GOOD choices today. Sometimes, people simply write a thread because its about them, not some big support for everyone else. This thread was about me, a night i had and the subsequent understandings that followed.

Perhaps the newbies should make note of what i and others in this thread are saying, when the damage is done its done, the only thing you can do is learn from it. What i learned was about keeping the follow through going and allowing it to move me into the next correct choice. Crying over spilt milk isn't what i want to do. I made bad choices yesterday, i am NOT continuing those bad choices by wallowing and beating myself up, and acting like i screwed it all up and i should be horsewhipped.

So today my wallowing and self-hating took the idea of making my menu this morning and sticking with it, making sure i had everything for the gym and going, talking myself through 45 minutes on the devil machine and then persisting through 30 minutes on the bike when i wanted to say its okay i don't need to finish. I am not crying over what happened last night tonight instead i am feeling stronger and having the follow-through attitude because in the past this bad choices would have sent me on the idea of what jess implied, however, the new stronger me learned from my past mistakes and i am very proud of how i handled today.

I am no longer going to post in this thread as the joy and support feeling has been diminished, and i want to take the supportive posts there were and hold them close and say thank you very much for giving me the strength to follow through today. It really meant a lot.

[cathyjobob]

Re: Follow through

I want a group hug right now or I walk!


I'm in NOOOOO way getting in the middle of this...I just wanted to say one little thing (If someone bites my head off I'll cry! I'll do it!)...

abstract...I've gotten to know Jess over the past week pretty well, and I don't think she meant what she said with any malice towards you, nor would she EVER try to hurt your feelings.

That's it...peace out!

[knicknack]

Re: Follow through

Hiya abstract -

Hopefully you're still reading this post even if you're not going to post in it.

I can relate absolutely to what you're saying. The fact of the matter is that sometimes we slip, and we absolutely have to learn how to deal with that when we do. It's great if we never slip but well, what happens when we do?

We dust ourselves off and get right back to it.

I for one think that the goal isn't really to never eat another bad carb again. I think the goal is to be able to control what you're eating. Once you're in maintenance, there's going to be grains, and bread, and more fruit, etc... Does that mean maintenance is a slippery slope to gaining the weight back? It shouldn't. But I think a mind shift has to happen, which is what you're referring to I think. We have to learn to think about food differently, not just eat differently.

Beating yourself up after a step off the wagon is the worst thing you can do, in my opinion. Doing that just makes it this big huge important thing, like the elephant in the room, which is giving it way more importance than it deserves. Because you know what? One pizza in a lifetime worth of atkins eating does not make you a failure. I'm not advocating taking that step off the wagon, I'm advocating making that step irrelevant. You make it irrelevant by getting back on the wagon at the next meal and you just keep on trucking.

[Outback Jess]

Re: Follow through

Sher, You don't need to in anyway apologize. I apologize for my statement that have offended you. You were being truthful. You felt this was a safe place. Obviously now you feel my statements have made it "not safe for you" and in that I am apologize and can only hope you can forgive me. There is such a bigger picture here, I hope that this will in no way cause you to avoid the good people at this site. This is cyberspace, but you are a real person, and I care about that. I would not casually walk away from this situation without trying to publcially and privately made this right.