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i need support!!
i am VERY disconcerted today, because last night i had my first cheat in almost 5 months!! my boss had me to her house for dinner, a very small, very exclusive gathering of people, which already had my guard up because everyone sees what you do and don't eat at the dinner table.
everyone at works knows i have been following this way of eating, and literally their words were 'you have done such a good job and have been working so hard, so we thought we'd give you a treat with a day off for your birthday!!'. so as a special surprise because it was MY birthday, they actually had one of the top resort chefs in the state come over and make the dinner----and SPECIFICALLY the chocolate lava cake for dessert !!
it was just too awkward to not eat it...my boss's house, one of the best chefs in the city, and everyone singing happy birthday, and all attention on me. the thing is, i didn't even WANT to eat it! i had PLENTY of willpower! but i thought it would be offensive and career suicide to make big deal of declining it.
anyway, the rest of the dinner was fish, steak, veggies, and i did have one forkful of cantaloupe and one forkful of melon, even though i am not on that rung, as well as one or two forkfuls of polenta (sort of like grits). i hated every minute of it, because i could resist the food, but not the pressure of the situation.
DID I RUIN EVERYTHING??? I have been so good about being cheat free, and now I am having a miserable birthday. Although somehow I am down 2 pounds???? Need support!!!
i am VERY disconcerted today, because last night i had my first cheat in almost 5 months!! my boss had me to her house for dinner, a very small, very exclusive gathering of people, which already had my guard up because everyone sees what you do and don't eat at the dinner table.
everyone at works knows i have been following this way of eating, and literally their words were 'you have done such a good job and have been working so hard, so we thought we'd give you a treat with a day off for your birthday!!'. so as a special surprise because it was MY birthday, they actually had one of the top resort chefs in the state come over and make the dinner----and SPECIFICALLY the chocolate lava cake for dessert !!
it was just too awkward to not eat it...my boss's house, one of the best chefs in the city, and everyone singing happy birthday, and all attention on me. the thing is, i didn't even WANT to eat it! i had PLENTY of willpower! but i thought it would be offensive and career suicide to make big deal of declining it.
anyway, the rest of the dinner was fish, steak, veggies, and i did have one forkful of cantaloupe and one forkful of melon, even though i am not on that rung, as well as one or two forkfuls of polenta (sort of like grits). i hated every minute of it, because i could resist the food, but not the pressure of the situation.
DID I RUIN EVERYTHING??? I have been so good about being cheat free, and now I am having a miserable birthday. Although somehow I am down 2 pounds???? Need support!!!
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