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Back on the wagon again... again! :)
,I've decided that my life's getting out of control. I've also noticed that my weight is causing most of my troubles. I can no longer walk out of my house without feeling judged by all of the skinny (and otherwise) people I see and I can't let this get any worse or I know it's going to stop me from living my life in happiness with my friends, family and at school. I'm a medical student and on my current rotation I'm not allowed to wear a white coat on the wards and I'm severely tempted to call in sick every day as not to walk down the corridors and talk to patients, etc. with my gut hanging out every which way and my legs flapping away. And I refuse to start buying size 22 clothes!
I'm 23 years old now, 5'7"... SIZE 20... and I weight 245lb. That's up from 220 last year... and 200 the year before... and 180 and so on and I can see that if I don't see this thing through to the last pound I'll keep gaining weight and further seclude myself from the people and things I love and, it seems, any chances of loving and being loved back so starting tomorrow I'm going to stop depending on food to fill my life and become the person I know I am instead of the sad girl whose sad reflection stares back at me every day.
Sorry if I've seemed a little down or if this isn't the right forum, but I think before I start again I needed to know where I'm coming from, the effect this is having on my quality of life and where I want to go. My goal is 130 (with a mini-goal of 150)- I've tried Atkins before and lost 20 lb about 4 times now in the last 2 years (gaining back every time), but Induction here I come... again!... and this time I know it's got to stick!!!
I'm thinking happy thoughts!
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