Sigh

[Analog6]

Re: Sigh

John, sorry you are still facing this problem (or problems with MIL too!). Obviosuly this is just her, and I think you know that.

That said, losing 4 stone is terrific, I've gone from 20st 8lbs to 16st 2 lbs, so a loss of 4 st 6lbs.

If you feel half as good as I do you will be able to shrug off their negativities and revel in your success. Keep up the good work and tell them to go and take a good hard look at themsleves in the mirror and their attitudes as well. You've tried being nice, maybe rude and nasty is called for?

[tabekat]

Re: Sigh

John my friend, I can totally relate.

When I first started Atkins back in February I was married to a totally non-supportive guy. He wouldn't listen to the truth about the Atkins program. He brought the wrongs foods in the house, including the ones that were really difficult for me to resist, like chips. He made nasty comments and told me I wasn't losing weight. He kept a rice cooker full of rice in the kitchen day and night so that the smell of it was always in the air.

He never had a clue about me or what the Atkins program was doing for me. Even after I was able to throw my diabetic meds out the window, and had the results of my amazing blood tests in hand, he refused to believe it was healthy for me or give me any credit.

Well guess what? I didn't need him.

Here is the truth. Your health is your business and no one elses. You do Atkins for you. It doesn't matter one iota what the spouse thinks. You do it for you. You just keep going and allow the naysayers no time in your head.

I never let that little weasel interfere with my committment to Atkins.

If anything his resistence to me doing what was best for me made me a stronger person. Now he is out of my life, I don't miss him and I only allow supportive, positive people in my personal space.

You stick to your guns.

[biogeek]

Re: Sigh

John, I'm sorry to hear that your wife is not supportive of you & your efforts to lose weight. I've heard of jealous spouses that were verbally abusive in order to hinder the weightloss process, but to add to the fact she is trying to sabotage your success so far by adding sugar to your meals, that is completely wrong! I agree with the other posts that suggested marriage counseling, if you feel this is a union that should be saved. You should be able to depend on your wife for love & support, and for heavens sakes, you should be able to trust her! I can't imagine being with someone like that, so I hope for your sake, that she changes her attitude.

Sorry for the soapbox, but your wife made me mad!

Anywho...congrats on losing all those stones in such a short period of time! I think you're doing a great job!!

[michigander]

Re: Sigh

John, please don't lose heart. I had the same problem, but people who have not lived the atkins lifestyle have no idea how important "just one bite" is. Any other diet, it really wouldn't be that big of a deal to add a little sugar and not think twice about it. They really just don't get it, unless they're the ones who step on the scale the next a.m. and figure out there musta been something extra in the secret stew!

I don't necessarily think she was sabotaging (?sp) your weight loss, but I do think it is threatening if you're trying to lose weight and your SO is beating you to it. My suggestion is why don't you offer to start cooking the meals, or help make it? That gives you the ability to ensure what goes into the dish, and she gets a break. This will also give you an opportunity to see how difficult it is to cook for WW as well. I've done both, and both take dedication. Its work doing this, but I was kidding myself when I thought that it wasn't work to be fat.

[big_bad_john]

Re: Sigh

I cook 100% of my meals and at least 50% of hers...Before I went Atkins I cooked about 95% of the time anyhow. So I guess I'm used to cooking...

Problem is she keeps offering to cook and keeps trying to smeak that sugar into my meals....

Maybe she'll repent and give up her evil diet sabotaging ways....(Yeah and whats that flying pig I see above me???)

[pladd04]

Re: Sigh

Just another reason I am here John, I weigh more then my husband and hate it. I would never say anything to ANYONE that is trying and doing well from what you've said. It sounds like you have gotten some really good advice on here and I hope she changes her mind and jumps onto the Atkins diet with you. Best wishes and best of luck

[Lady_Hawke]

Re: Sigh

When she offers to cook for you - look her right in the eye and say "nope I can't trust you to not put suger in my food." then go cook for yourself. When the heck is her mother going home?

You might be right, she might need a taste of her own medicine. Fill the house up with chocolate cakes, treat her the way she treats you and when she calls you on it - and she will - ask her how she feels having all the temptations around. ask her how it feels that you aren't supporting her WW way of life. and then when she tells you how crappy she feels about it - BAM! You can take out the big black trash bag toss out all the crap food and tell her that you where treating her the way she treats you - tell her it is a crap feeling and then sit down and tell her that you will be happy to support her WW way of life if she gives you the same respect.

Good luck man

[big_bad_john]

Re: Sigh

Her mother went home weeks ago....

But the room she slept in always seems to be cold....

woooooo spookie

[sunflowergrl]

Re: Sigh

LOL!! John, you are awesome!! I love reading your posts!! Too funny!!! I can always see my breath when the MIL in comming!!! I see mean people!!!

[michigander]

Re: Sigh

That's just plain crazy! If I had a hubby offering to cook me only diet food, I'd join his diet in a heartbeat. Then again, I'm an "if ya can't beat em, join em" kinda girl. What if you just "accidentally" threw away all of the sugar in the house? Ooops! Hey!!! I've got an idea, have you considered investing in a nanny cam? You can hide it in the pepper shaker! (JK!)

[big_bad_john]

Re: Sigh

I'm in the frame of mind right now to keep the sugar but lose her instead...

[michigander]

Re: Sigh

Yikes! Atkins makes you lose spouses too? Not sure I'm that committed to it! Oh...wait....I don't have a spouse. Then again, maybe atkins will help me real one in!

[goin2Bgood]

Re: Sigh

maybe atkins will help me real one in!

It appears you can have his

John I'm very sorry for your troubles. Just stay on your program and do the best you can. Take her sabotage and mean ways and turn it around to help boost your own resolve and determination.

[Austlyn]

Re: Sigh

John it could be that she feels a wee bit threatened by your new transformation. Some spouses harp and harp about the weight, then feel weird about it should their partner actually lose the weight. Like their security blanket has been taken away. The more you continue to lose and feel good about yourself, the more your outward and inward confidance shows. I could be waaaay off base here, but its just a thought, by her telling you that you haven't lost weight, might be her way of trying to get you to cave so she can have her security blanket back. I hope its not that, but I have seen it many times in my life with friends and family. Even saw one hubby try to sabotage his wife by bringing in junk food and eating it in front of her. Nasty. If this is the situation, you could save some fur flying by sitting down your partner and reasurring her that no matter what you weigh, that she will always be the one for you, and that you really need her on your side cheering on your progress. Hug

__________________

I agree that partners feel this way when you start losing weight, I also do not know how heavy you were to begin with but the larger we are the less the weight loss shows on us I had to lose 50 pounds before my hubby noticed. Maybe she is not being mean in her mind, maybe she truly believes what she said and you could tell her you need more support from her. Woman understand these things usually and she may be very insecure especially if she is overweight herself and is worried she can not have the same success you have. hope it all works out okay after all she is your wife.