I can't stand it anymore!

[SkaPaladin]

Okay, here goes. First things first.

My family is totally unsupportive. I have two sisters that are overweight, and were initially impressed with my progress. They saw me back when I dropped 75 lbs last year, and wanted to start on Atkins with me. As did my mother. My father was happy where he was.

Things happened, and I had to move back in with them. And their non-Atkins supporting lifestyle. So I packed on 20. Currently, I have been on the diet for almost a month, with no real snags. And almost absolutely no support. On top of no support, the family members that want to lose weight with me, don't want to lose it enough to make the sacrifices required, and are constantly putting it off. "I'll start Monday." "I messed up so I'll start next month." "That looks real good, I'm gonna get some anyways." And so on...

We did the Battle of the Flowers parade out here not too long ago. We always take food to the parade. None of it was Atkins friendly, nor did they consider the fact that I wouldn't be able to eat any of it. (They were considerate enough to get me a 12 pack of Diet Dr Pepper. Yay...)

The fridge is full of goodies I can't touch, and used to always love. Mostly snack cakes, and fruit. "Because fruit is okay, right? It's healthy?" They never listen when I tell them what they can eat in the first two weeks. And since I'm not there to slap their wrists when they slip, they start over, again, and again, and again.

Couple it with the fact that they got my mother an ice cream/cheesecake for mothers day, in which half is still in the freezer, and I'm home alone with nothing to snack on, and a terrible sweets craving.

And to top it all off, during my time on this diet successfully, I've gotten sick twice, and started working a job that I actually kinda hate, and have only lost like, 3 lbs of what I put back on, I'm beginning to wonder what the point is nowadays.

I initially started the diet, with a reasonable goal to hit by the beginning of June, and I know for a fact I'm not going to hit it now.

Can someone please give me some words of support? I need it now more than ever, and I know that if I don't get it, I'm gonna slip, and I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't. And that's the only thing that's keeping me from giving up and starting all over again.

[Theperfect10]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

Hi Ska, welcome to the boards. My advice to you is to visualise how you want to look. Keep that picture in mind and when you feel like quitting, look in the mirror and ask yourself if having that piece of cheesecake, bread, cakes or whatever temptation is there, is worth not reaching that visualisation.
You deserve to be a healthy weight and you need to take control.
It must be difficult doing so without the support of your family. Can you stock the fridge with Atkin friendly foods? Check out the recipes section of the boards - there are wonderful recipes for cheesecake and other goodies, that are literally saving both my and dbf's life! He has a major sweet tooth and without having a little atkin friendly treat once a week, we may have been tempted to slip from this woe.

I have faith in you. You can do this! Keep posting, to let us know how you do.

Another tip is to start a journal. You can write absolutly anything in it - and it may be a great place to vent about non-supportive family members!

Good luck and keep up the good work.

[SkaPaladin]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

Oh, don't get me wrong, I have used quite a few of those recipes in my time. And I <3 them all. What I can't stand, is that because of this new job, I hardly ever have any time for myself anymore, except for on the weekends. And since it's physically demanding (I got a physical job to help force some exercise out of me) the only free time I have is on the weekends. I know for a fact, I'm not gonna be keeping this job for very long. I would much rather work at an office and go to the gym. My last gym stint forced a lot more progress than this job.

But, even when I make extra time to head out to the store to buy stuff I need, by the time I get around to using it, someone else has used it before I have any opportunity to make it.

My ground beef is always gone, as are my chicken fajitas (quick to make) my cream cheese, my pickles, my tuna... And since there are so many other things available for my family to eat, they don't worry about replacing most of it.

I just wish I could get permission to kick one of them in the face when they do something severely unsupportive. My favorite is when my dad says "Well, I'm not on the diet, am I?"

[RIMedusa]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

Hi there --

Okay, first, I'm sending you support across cyber space. Hope you can feel it.

Second, and you may not like this, the best thing for you to do right now -- and this is not the truth, just an opinion -- is to TAKE CARE OF YOU, with or without their support.

If they want ice cream cake, let them eat it.

I know that the path of least resistance and most harm for me is to make anyone else responsible for what I'm eating or how I'm living my life.

It simply is no one's responsibility but mine.

Here's an idea: how about a little bar fridge for your room? The only reason I'm suggesting this is that your family is actually eating your food!

Use their freezer, but keep your other suff -- even your cans of tuna -- in your room. Would that work?

I wanted my significant other to try this WOE, but I knew that if I said anything, S.O. would completely resist.

Instead, I took on being an example, and now S.O. went out and started!

Good luck, and keep going!

[D14965]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

Yes - hiding your atkins food is a good idea. I have to hide my stash of pork rinds from my daughter because she loves them ! They are hard to get here sometimes so when i find them i stock up . I do share them with her -- but she has to ask me to get them for her so i can ration them out !
I understand you must feel like your family are trying to sabotage your efforts to make yourself healthier . I have been extremely lucky in that respect .. my partner is very supportive and my younger brother is also doing atkins so if we have a family gathering we bring atkins friendly food - I even do a great almond and lemon cake that even the non atkineers love !There is such a lot of options for yummy food with this way of eating.The forums are great for support -I would have fallen off the wagon long ago had it not been for the wonderful people in here.
Try not to let your family's attitude put you off your goal.I had to educate my mother that " a little bit wont hurt" is not how this WOE works -- yes a little bit will set you back and make things harder for you... after 5 months I think she is now understanding how it all works. I leave my DANDR book out for all to see so they can have a read -- my partner is becoming quite the authority on Atkins . Maybe your family would be more supportive if they understood the way the plan actually works - do you have the book? would they read it?
If you asked them to respect your choices and be supportive - and NOT eat your atkins food etc they may get the hint that you are serious .If they chose to be overweight then that is their issue ,not yours - they should respect the fact that you want to do something to make yourself healthier and not try to sabotage your efforts

Good luck!

[soliwit]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

Heya Ska !
I am just chiming in with the others, i think having a little fridge for yourself or at least a place where you can hide your own food is a great idea, and second have a real serious talk with your family, that you really need to do this and that it doesn't matter if THEY don't want to do this, but that they can at least TRY to help you a bit.
You might not be able to get to your goal for june, but I bet you can get darn close, so put in al the force you got in you and DO IT, I KNOW you can !!!!!
A big hug is in place here !!!!

[sallyseachange]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

Having your own fridge is a great idea. And a fierce dog in front of it to guard it too! (j/k). You need to do this for yourself, even if you don't have the support of your family. I also did Atkins with little or no support... I reached goal and have been maintaining, still with no support, but by now, I just automatically cook the things my family eat, for them (which is usually only pasta or potatoes extra) and ignore their so called "witticisms" about my way of eating.
You can do this. We're here to help!
Stick to your guns sweetie... it's soooooooo worth it in the long run!

[kisstuck]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

Ska, you can do this. Will power is hard, but we have all faced some sort of obstacle or critisism about this WOE. I personally have a co-worker who constantly criticizes the way I eat. She grudgingly acknowledges that I have lost considerable weight and that I look better, but she still tries to sabbotage me every chance she gets. (ie: bringing candy, cookies, granola bars, cake, etc) Tonight everyone ordered mexican complete with chips and tortillas. It was super hard to say no, but I know that there is no food in the world that makes me feel as good as being thin! Good luck. Definately get your own fridge and cupboard for your room!

[CDRAKE1234]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

I totally understand and agree with KISS!!!
This 'co-worker' can be very difficult to work with! It is all negative and not what we need or want! We need to be supportive for each other and that is partially what brings us together on the ADBB!!!

Keep it up and don't get down!! (*big hug*) (take the suggestion of 'several' members and get that fridge girl!!!)

[Big Blue Nation]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

I can't stand the fact that success will always bring haters who can't (or just plain won't) bring the success upon themselves.

If you're paying to stay there, have your family re-imburse your food expense so you can go get that fridge. And try to stay positive - remember that you have friends here!

[teejay]

Re: I can't stand it anymore!

Hey paladin,

I definitely agree that you need your own fridge in your room and your could go so far as to get an apartment size fridge with a freezer. They are smaller than a full size fridge, but you don't need a lot of space. I would also invest in some hasps and locks for your fridge, freezer, and some type of cabinet for your canned and dry goods. If they don't like it well just tell them, calmly, that you have tried to get their support and they are unable to offer you the support you need. Make sure to let them know that your health is more important to you than their hurt feelings. If they can't be trusted to leave your stuff alone, then they can't have access to your stuff. Simple.
That is what I had to do with my children. They would steal somebody else's food, get caught with the evidence and either lie, or act like "hey it's no big deal, it's just food"

Keep on track for your self and let the rest figure it out for themselves. If they truly want help they will learn by READING THE BOOK and by seeing your shining example.

Just my 2 cents
TJ