Husband Sabotoge

[MommaRuthie]

My dear sweet and wonderful husband has been so wonderful at supporting me in this WOE. Pretty much our whole family eats what i eat but i add in healthy carbs for the kids- they are both underweight(brwn rice, potatoes, whole wheat bread/pasta- and they do get cookes/cake 2-3 times /wk)

However, my husband started buying me food treats lately to show that he loves me... It may have something to do with the fact that all the stores have valentines displays up...

Does anyone else have a well-meaning spouse who tempts them?? He did agree not to buy anymore chocolates for me.

[Elizellen]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

Tell him that you prefer treats like a massage, new shoes, diamond rings instead!!

[widget246k]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

My husband used to do this all the time and he would get mad when I told him that I wasn't eating cupcakes and that kind of stuff anymore. Finally, I sat him down and told him exactly why I cannot and will not eat those treats. Now when he wants to show me he loves me, he takes me to dinner at a steakhouse (so I can get something Atkins-Friendly, of course) or he'll treat me to manicures, pedicures, or getting my hair cut and colored.

[barbecuer]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

My husband used to do this all the time and he would get mad when I told him that I wasn't eating cupcakes and that kind of stuff anymore. Finally, I sat him down and told him exactly why I cannot and will not eat those treats. Now when he wants to show me he loves me, he takes me to dinner at a steakhouse (so I can get something Atkins-Friendly, of course) or he'll treat me to manicures, pedicures, or getting my hair cut and colored.

I want someone to take me to a steakhouse...

I am not going to say your husband is trying to sabotage, but in some cases, people do it subconsciously. My wife's boss never fails to start buying my wife chocolate treats whenever she is on a diet. The treats always stopped after the diet was over. I would like to think she didn't do it intentionally, but who knows.

[Kathi22]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

It's how they know to be sweet and giving lol - my husband knows I love pizza, and he will ask when I am having a bad day if I want a slice. I finally just asked him if he wants to see me cry over my weight and health all the time? And I said it forcefully because I was annoyed. He got all choked up and walked away - came back a few minutes later with a yoga mat, cut up some veggies, and told me he just wants me happy. I had to say it that way to get him to stop offering me comfort food - and it worked out very well!

[SunnySmile501]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

It's how they know to be sweet and giving lol - my husband knows I love pizza, and he will ask when I am having a bad day if I want a slice. I finally just asked him if he wants to see me cry over my weight and health all the time? And I said it forcefully because I was annoyed. He got all choked up and walked away - came back a few minutes later with a yoga mat, cut up some veggies, and told me he just wants me happy. I had to say it that way to get him to stop offering me comfort food - and it worked out very well!

Awwwwwwwwww he is a keeper!

[Kathi22]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

Thank you Sunny - he really is

[MommaRuthie]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

well after I talked to my hubby he managed to eat 1 lb of assorted chocolates, and a pint of godiva chocolate ice cream that he bought for me. That wasn't exactly what i had in mind but it got it out of the house... i have just dosed him with some pepto bismo. LOL

[Sunny_0ne]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

It's how they know to be sweet and giving lol - my husband knows I love pizza, and he will ask when I am having a bad day if I want a slice. I finally just asked him if he wants to see me cry over my weight and health all the time? And I said it forcefully because I was annoyed. He got all choked up and walked away - came back a few minutes later with a yoga mat, cut up some veggies, and told me he just wants me happy. I had to say it that way to get him to stop offering me comfort food - and it worked out very well!

Wow!!!!!!! He IS a keeper!

My husband loves to fry bacon... not eat it... just loves cooking it. It used to be the bane of my existence... now I know I'll always have an emergency snack around.

He also is SO proud of my weight loss. Tells me several times a day how good I look. And he means it!

That's a pretty amazing thing to hear at my age!

[carlae]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

I've been back to this woe for 3 weeks now, and my husband has baked 3 cakes. I've managed not to eat any of it, and am so proud of myself. I think he was testing me.

carlae
SW/206
CW/192
GW/qrt

[imagood1]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

my husband is very supportive....BUT, he's what I call "a feeder"....everything he has on his plate or is going to eat he thinks he needs to give you a bite.....it's annoying but I understand after 9 years together it's not that he's trying to sabbotage me, it's just something he does. I use to eat what he fed me....now I thank him and tell him "no thank you - I'm not eating that right now". He doesn't get offended and I don't have to get upset with him.

His birthday is Monday and I was dreading it but we decided (in other words I suggested) we go to Outback for our dinner. Instead of a potato I can have a veggie and they have good salads plus I'm DYING for a NY Strip steak!!!!! Yummie...I'm so happy he's getting older...ROFL!!!

[Sunny_0ne]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

I've been back to this woe for 3 weeks now, and my husband has baked 3 cakes. I've managed not to eat any of it, and am so proud of myself. I think he was testing me.

carlae
SW/206
CW/192
GW/qrt

carlae, I think you deserve a medal for heroism!

I wish that you could talk him into cooking some of the legal desserts instead, though. (hugs)

[Sookie]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

My husband is one of those people who eats all day long, and it doesn't matter what he eats, he stays thin. When we moved in together I gained fifty pounds in the first sixth months - he wanted me to eat with him and he wanted me to eat as much as he did. So after twelve years together, I think he realizes that he's just going to have to eat alone sometimes - really, it wasn't enough to keep him company while he ate, he wanted me to eat along with him. It's taken along time to get him to see that our dietary needs are completely different and I still have to reinforce this point once in a while because he still will bring home tempting things that he dang well knows that I can't have. I think now he can see that it makes me happier now that I'm losing weight and feeling better and instead of talking about food, he talks about how he wants me to get a whole new wardrobe when I reach my goal. I think because he's always been able to eat copious amounts of food without gaining weight, he really doesn't get what I'm experiencing and all the misery it has caused me. But he does understand that if I'm happy, the house is a better place to come home to and that works for me.

[sadie147]

Re: Husband Sabotoge

I've been on this woe going on 5 years now and my husband still buys me chocolates on valentines day LOL. I usually give them to my stepdaughter (as my gift to her..he doesn't have a clue he just thinks i bought the same ones). Last week he wanted to take me out for fish and chips for dinner. You'd think after 5 years he'd know? But And it's not because he's trying to sabotage me.

I think that you have to be sympathetic in a way and realize that you can't expect someone who is not on this woe, has never read the book, doesn't spend half their day on adbb every day, can have every food and rule memorized. I don't expect him to know every food that I can eat off the top of his head. I don't get angry with him..I just suggest somethign else and then it's fine.

Also, my husband has watched me diet for 15 years, on various diets prior to this one, most of which i 'cheated' on, ate cake, ate chocolates, ate fish and chips at some point....I figure this is probably the reason as well!