Day of confessions

[Elizellen]

Re: Day of confessions

My hubi gave me an early bday present (an all in one oven with many features) well its what I wanted so today I decided to make everyone a pizza and yes you guessed it I had one too it was the smell and the look so I messed up.Tomorrow im back on track.NO MORE PIZZA MAKING FOR ME!

What a lovely pressie, sham!!
I noticed in another thread that you are going back on induction to help you get back on track - well done for stopping that cheat and getting back on plan quickly
A few days of induction eating ought to get you back into ketosis so you can resume your OWL rung 2 eating within the week!! Onwards and up the OWL ladder

[neutronnorman]

Re: Day of confessions

I'm blessed in a certain way: I have never craved sweets. Never! In fact, in retrospect, cakes, pies, donuts, chocolate, etc. always tasted metallic. Yes, I did enjoy a pizza or pasta from time to time, but I was your typical, basic Neanderthal: meat and potatoes. I gained weight the last few years because of excessive beer and alcohol consumption, no exercise, extreme stress and absolutely no time for recreation. I've always been strong, my mom was telling me last night. Honestly, I'm the type of guy that just looking at a weight set seems to add muscle to my frame. My dad had the same genetics and on his side of the family were many Olympic athletes in different sports. I remember about 12 years ago I dropped from a 35" waist line to a 31" in less than 15 days. About 6 years ago, I got into bike riding, Within 2 weeks, I was averaging 14.5 MPH (I got a Cat's Eye and kept a log) and bicycling around 18 miles 5-6 times per week. It took me a little bit under an hour and 20 minutes to cycle the distance.

I don't crave sweets, but, believe it or not, I crave meats, oils and fish. When I carb load for 12 -16 hours (I know, a no-no) all I think about is eggs and steak!

I read about so many dieters, especially women, that battle sugar cravings. I'm not a biochemist (I'm theoretical-computational) but I wonder how much insulin resistance is do to heredity and hormone imbalances.

One more pleasing note. Before low carbing, my blood pressure was uncontrollable. I was on, count them, four hypertensive medications: Diltiazen CD, Lotensin, Cardura, and Maxine. Even with those meds, my B.P. was still elevated averaging about 145-150/90-95. Now, it averages (I take my B.P. twice a day) 111/72. And I totally weaned off the medications. I've totaly eliminated Diltiazem, Lotensin and Maxine. I dropped my Cardura (Doxasosin) from 10 mg daily to 2.5 mg. I hoping to eliminate cardura completley by the end of July. My resting pulse rate has dropped by about 20 beats per minute.

What am I trying to say? "Nothin'." I'm just thinking out load.

[sham]

Re: Day of confessions

Im still not on track after that pizza moment on saturday im still not restarting because its my bday 2moro and a year on atkins the kids want me to have a little cake and pizza party so i promised them we would to celebrate months ago.If i was to restart i would have to break it again so i must confess im watching what im eating but must admit won't lie im starting induction wednesday and i feel im so missing the diet im dying to lose more.Wednesday come quick!

Thanks Ellizellen I will be ok im watching what im eating and will be back on track soon.

[goin2befit]

Re: Day of confessions

Sham~ Totally understand your confession. I do believe acknowleging what you are doing makes us feel more incontrol of what we are doing. And control issue is really one reason many of us are overweight.

I'm very proud you have made it 1 year on Atkins... However, as this is a life long process I think we need to think of rewards that still bring us pleasure, but doesn't have to be food related... Maybe you could have taken the kids out for putt-putt, or an arcade, or zoo, ect. So keep that in mind for your 2nd year anniversary!!!! I'm sure 100% you will make it.

As for me I'm kinda doing a free day binge. Yes, I know it is no where in the book. I've followed for 2.5 weeks and I've only lost like 8lbs... me needing to loose about 220 pounds, so introduction didn't really seem to have given me enough push, but I'm almost certain the birthcontrol I'm taking is stopping me!!! At the end of this month I will mostlikely go off of it. I am so tempted to stop it right now this moment, but I'm mid pack and that will just through my hormones into orbit and help nothing... so I'm going to try next month without it and see what happens. I have only been on b/c for 3 months and I know my body doesn't have problems loosing weight WHEN I DON"T CHEAT AND FOLLOW PLAN>>> so I know something else is going on.

With that being said, I have 11 more days to tell for sure. That is when I take the last of the b/c pills with medicine. .So between now and then I feel bummed. Today I decided to take a break and just kinda have some things... not to much, but mostly some honey and some chocolate, not together though... I know I shouldn't and I even thought about it and asked myself alot why I'm doing it... I mean I have planned it over the weekend... But I feel overwhelmed and stressed that I'm not loosing and just kinda want a break to re-focus. I know that probably makes no since and like you, I'm sure I'll be 100% back to the WOE come tomorrow. I know I will most likely not "feel" normal today, but I want to just not think about it. Just want that free moment.

I know my journey is long and I know I'm not going to be perfect everyday and I feel like just taking a vacaction day especially while I know my body is not loosing as it should so I'm kinda like why bother, but at the same time I don't want to hold that mindset for longer than a day b/c for sure I don't want to gain what I lost back... so just to balance until the end of the day. And even not the whole day, afte 3pm EST I decided I'd be back on plan so even before tomorrow...

Okay, that is the truth for today..

ps even writing this and I'm still questioning myself why I really feel this way and I guess I need some comfort, need to think of some other things for comfort feeling that involves just myself.

[ldyj]

Re: Day of confessions

Oh, Amanda, I've got my arms around you, girl friend!! I know your feelings, I've had them myself the last couple days. A few nuts here, a drink there, not too much, but enough to know "this isn't gonna work!" I've tried to analyze too the whys as well as the why nots (as in, "why not, I'm not losing") and have no answers. But I do know this. If we don't stick to something, anything, Atkins, WW, South Beach, calorie counting, whatever, we'll never reach our goal weight. We'll just be adrift thinking about what could have been IF. . ..

So hang in there, sweetie, and know you're not alone!

[goin2befit]

Re: Day of confessions

Jeannette~
Thanks for the encouragement. I guess that is kinda what happened. I kept wanting and thinking to much about a bit here and there and I guess I figured, just take a vacation day and go again. So I did. I have no guilt of yesterday, it is a day in my past (hopefully the last vacation day I feel I need, but maybe not, and if not I'll deal with it again when it comes) I did enjoy what I ate, I'm not going to lie about it, however, I also realize it is going to give me a small set back. My last meal was 100% back on plan and no cravings so far. Atleast I don't feel I "need" a bit of anything and I'm focused again. I'm sure it is not for everyone, but it may have been what I needed to just keep going. Keep rolling along...

[sham]

Re: Day of confessions

Last day of cheat today as its my bday Im having pizza and carrot and walnut cake but tomorrow i begin a strict induction more determined than ever.All the best everyone!

[sheddingflab]

Re: Day of confessions

I love this thread...and I have a confession:

As some of you may know, I've gone on and off plan a few times, but even when I am on plan, I can't seem to ditch the caffeine. I have tried before because I felt like I "should", but honestly, I never REALLY wanted to. I really don't want to. I'm drinking a caffeinated coffee with heavy cream and a half packet of sugar twin right now as we speak lol. That's another thing...sweeteners...I don't use a lot of them because I only use them in coffee and use a half packet per cup of coffee, but I never really pay attention to the type of sweetener or anything. I get whatever is cheaper and on sale lol. The splenda 50 packet box was 3.99, and the sugar twin was 1.89, and since I'm broke as **** anyways, I got the cheap one!

Anyways I just don't see myself ditching the caffeine...I still lose weight and don't have cravings unless I am low on Atkins friendly food and money and end up eating things I shouldn't...

Ok one more confession...I get the sugar free breakfast sausages fresh from the meat department, but I put sugar free pancake syrup on them sometimes....hehe....

[ldyj]

Re: Day of confessions

Ah, well, Sheddingflab, at least you won't have to worry about getting alzheimers!

WKZO NEWS: Caffeine Could Play Role in Alzheimer's Treatment

[not2late]

Re: Day of confessions

Confession is good for the soul, but unless you resolve yourself to sticking to this diet rather than succumbing to the next tempation (and we all know there will be one!), you'll be restarting and restarting and restarting. In fact, you might as well introduce yourself and start posting in the "STAC" forum now, because that's where you'll end up if you consistently choose that cake or that cookie or whatever over your health.

There will always be a birthday party, or an anniversary, or a dinner date, etc. There will always be an excuse to cheat. Each excuse you make is one step backward. It's that much longer to goal. It's starting over again. And it's eventually feeling like a total loser because you can't stick to a diet long enough to lose the weight you want to lose.

So confess all you want. But while you are confessing, start making plans on how to cope with tempations rather than submit to them. If you don't bother to devise coping skills, then you'd better bookmark this: Second Time Around Club - Atkins Diet

I want all of you to post a "I REACHED GOAL!" thread on ADBB. But taking conscious steps backward won't get you to goal anytime soon. YOU are more important and worthwhile than that cake or cookies or pasta etc. Choose YOU. You're worth it.

[goin2befit]

Re: Day of confessions

Megs~
Thanks for your kind reminder that we do need to be 100% on plan. I'm glad that some people able to stay committed and yes a "planned" cheat is 1 step backwards only if you view it that way. Honestly, I've been back on track and more focused. I didn't restart. I just continued doing what I had been doing before a took a "moments break" and I have honestly lost weight since then. I have grown to really learn my body, my triggers, and the ins and out of how my body digests and process food for the most part.

The other thing is for alot of people we are not really 100% committed b/c mentally we have not prepared ourselves to give up this or that, or have an action plan of what to do at a party when it comes or for some of us that party is such a rare occasion (1-2 times a year) that we do want to participate, even if it will stop us for a moment.

I believe that "self abuse" is one of the worst things that a person can do. That is how I got to 400 pounds is that feeling I should be "Perfect" in my eating and when I wasn't I would abuse myself as I'm stuffing that bag of oreo's down my throat of how horrible I am, ect.. many have been there and done that, has the extra weight to show for it.

I think the idea should be 50% mental, 30% diet, 20% exercise... b/c for most loosing weight wasn't just about finding a great diet (WOE), it has been a mental challenge.

Also, for example Sheddingflab did confess to something that SHOULD be wrong... caffeine is suppose to be a no/no, but for some it doesn't stall and she has found out that her body is okay with it, same for the sweatners, now of course if she hits a plateau or a stall she may reevaluate it.. but I guess for her it isn't the caffine, it may have just been the 3 donuts she use to eat while drinking the coffee.

Please note... I don't want anyone to think I took what Meg said wrong or offensive b/c I know she offers great/sound advise and she has definately been around long enough to see what happens, at the same time.. We are all humans and if confessing helps us to "deal" with what is going on and get back on track to ramble away.

[not2late]

Re: Day of confessions

No offense taken on my part,

I just want all of you to think what is more important: you or a food. In my opinion, YOU are more important. And YOU should think that way too! That's why YOU should choose YOU over a cake or whatever.

You all have to commit to yourself that YOU are worth something. I know that alot of us have really bad self-esteem---so bad that we think we actually deserve to be fat, unhappy and unhealthy. So we constantly sabotage ourselves: we lose a few pounds then we "reward" ourselves with food and we regain the pounds we lost. Or we cop out and say "Well, I being forced to eat this piece of cake because I'm too ashamed/weak/embarrased tell anyone "Thank you, but I'm trying to eat healthier and sugary stuff isn't healthy for me."

PUT YOURSELF FIRST! You shouldn't care what anyone says or does if you don't eat the mashed potatoes?! Because it's not their health and life at stake----it's yours.

And seriously, if you drop dead tomorrow because you are overweight, do you really think those people will say "Gosh, I wish I didn't bring that chocolate cake over." No way! They'll think to themselves "That's what happens when you abuse your body by stuffing yourself like a Thanksgiving turkey 24/7. I kept saying "you better lose weight". But no one paid attention to me." And they are correct because YOU are the one who makes the ultimate decision about what you eat and don't eat.

You don't cheat on the diet when you eat off plan: You cheat yourself! You cheat yourself of getting to goal sooner. You cheat yourself because you confirm that you have no desire to lose weight and so you don't deserve to be slim and healthy.

This is your opportunity to prove to yourself that you ARE worthy and ARE worth all the effort.

[ldyj]

Re: Day of confessions

Well said, Amanda AND Megs! The reality of life is somewhere between the words of both of you.

If I am to succeed (and I will!!) then I can't think of being "on plan" or "off plan," that makes it more like a "diet" in my mind. I just do what I know I'm going to do the rest of my life to the best of my ability, and that ability includes my mental state at any given time.

We all know it's what's going on emotionally that causes us to make choices we may (or may not. . .) later regret. I don't want our wonderful "Day of confessions" thread to become a place where people feel that can yo yo and post about it and it makes everything O.K. But I love that I can come here and be honest about my struggles to change my life.

I know those changes will be less of a struggle if I don't stay on Induction. I discovered that by the foods I want. Since I want milk (which is strange to me since I never was a milk drinker!), then I have to work my way to Rung 3 for the almond drink. If I want a cocktail, then I have to work through the Rungs to Rung 5, and since I have to succeed at each Rung before I can move on, it makes me more determined to do each Rung as correctly as I can.

That being said, IF I choose to have that drink or those nuts because of a "life situation," I can live with it because I don't count it as a "cheat." but a decision, while maybe not a wise one, one that I can live with and NOT beat myself up over, since I know how I'll be eating at my next meal; the way I'll eat for the rest of my life.

So I believe my attitude, ADBB, and this thread will assist me on my successful path to goal weight! It may take me longer then those who lovingly caution not to "take a day," or even "a moment," but I'll be less likely to fall down and never get up if I work my life this way!

[sheddingflab]

Re: Day of confessions

well said everyone. goin2befit you're right somewhat about the three donuts i used to have with the coffee lol. actually it was more like a big muffin, or a big bagel lol. sometimes i miss them, but i don't miss gaining weight and feeling miserable. i don't want to be a bad example for newbies reading this though....caffeine certainly does stall many people and cause cravings like crazy. and if in the future i suppose it could even cause me to hit a plateau...but until then...pass the cream lol....i'm bad i know.

not2late you hit the nail on the head with the poor self esteem and self sabotage issues...that's been my biggest problem in the past. i feel a lot better about myself now and i know i deserve to be healthy and happy, and that's a big part of what's going to help me succeed this time. And not worrying about hurting someone's feelings if i don't eat their cake or brownies or whatever baked good lol. Actually I have a decent excuse now, I know from buying a glucometer and testing supplies that my blood sugar was getting out of control...so I am just going to blame it on being pre-diabetic!

[not2late]

Re: Day of confessions

not2late you hit the nail on the head with the poor self esteem and self sabotage issues...that's been my biggest problem in the past. i feel a lot better about myself now and i know i deserve to be healthy and happy, and that's a big part of what's going to help me succeed this time. And not worrying about hurting someone's feelings if i don't eat their cake or brownies or whatever baked good lol. Actually I have a decent excuse now, I know from buying a glucometer and testing supplies that my blood sugar was getting out of control...so I am just going to blame it on being pre-diabetic!

It took me a while but I've realized this....no one really cares what you eat or don't eat at parties, dinners, etc. When I was on Rung 1 OWL, I was served a St. Patrick's Day type meal---corned beef, potatoes, carrots, cabbage, soda bread, etc---at a dinner. I ate the corned beef and the cabbage only. I passed on the soda bread with the excuse that I couldn't eat another bite (which I really couldn't). My host didn't throw me out of his house because I didn't eat the potatoes, carrots or soda bread. He didn't tell me never to call or come over again. He didn't set the dogs on me. Ditto when I went to a wedding: the bride didn't break down into tears because I passed on the wedding cake, the groom didn't threaten to sue me because I ruined the wedding when I didn't eat the mashed potatoes, the best man didn't make an announcement that I didn't drink the cheap champagne (really sparkling wine). No one cares.

Regarding the well meaning relatives/friends----if they really are in your corner, really supportive of you, they won't push you to eat anything that you cannot eat. They will cheer you on, not try to derail you at every chance. They know you need to lose weight: I mean if you are 50 pounds overweight, it's not a secret that you could stand to lose a few pounds. And they should be encouraging you and supporting you IF they really care about YOU and not themselves.

The people who discourage you typically do that in order to make themselves feel better. They look at you and think "Yeah, my life sucks but at least I'm not as big as a whale like she/he is!" And they want to keep you that way so they can continue to feel good about themselves.

So stick up for yourself. Choose YOU, because you are more important than cookies, cakes, pastas, beers, parties, birthdays, etc. Move up, not down.