Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

[kaylasgram]

Good Afternoon to my Atkins Friends!!!

I guess Iam just being silly but when I weighed~in this AM Iam 8oz short of loosing 50pounds & Iam very excited.

I said to my Friend/Business Partner which I guess I should point out used to be my 5yr BF until 3 about months ago. I have in 8 more ounces, lost a whole large bag of Dog Kibble (we breed Germ Shep's), which I went over & stood next to. I then said this used to be on my body isnt it crazy that is gone off of me or 5 ~ 10 pound bags of potatoes!!!

Well his reply was that's good, if that Diet of your's makes you happy then Iam happy for you. I never said I wanted you to loose any weight!!!

Well I burst out into full tears. Maybe Iam expecting toooo much from others but I just really needed to hear alil more than that!!!

I said to him this isnt about making me Happy, this is for my HEALTH. Its NOT a DIET its a Way Of Eating for the Rest Of My Life. You Still Don't Get It Do You!!!

Iam off my HBP & Type II Diabetes Meds & my Lupus/Fibro is easer to manage on a daily basis, don't you see that is amazing in 7 months!!!

Iam sooooo proud of myself & just needed to hear him say that hes was proud of me as well !!!

His nonsupport of Atkins was one of the things that tore us apart, now there were already other issues, but this did play a big role in the end!!!

Thanks for letting me vent, I was still crying, shaking all over & felt like I was going to explode when I first got on the computer!!!

~Cindi~

[Ohbehave007]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

Congratulations on your loss! It is amazing.

My boyfriend supports me and I have made it very clear I don't want to hear any whining from him, but when you have lost something you get so excited and I remember asking my boyfriend a few weeks ago, "How do I look, can you tell?" His answer was, "Not really!" I was majorly pissed. But later that night my brother made me feel better by commenting on it with, "Damn Girl! You look great!" So yeah.

50lbs is great, I can't wait until that day bites me on the butt.

[neutronnorman]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

Us men can be absolute jerks and insensitive to women's needs. We do think differently, we are wired differently. I would guess, that I might score about a 62% accuracy level when it comes to saying 'the right thing' to a lady.

My hunch is that he's probably a bit insecure with your weight loss because, and it comes with the territory, when a woman loses weight and /or is thin, we tend to check the lady out. We are visual. He's probably concerned about competition.

I'm sorry that your moment of happiness was sort of shattered by insensitivity. We all need a good pat on our backs when we accomplish something that is extremely important to ourselves.

You've lost weight, looking good, no more BP, controlling Lupus and have your diabetes under control, way to go! Great job!

Five years with a BF is a long time. It will take quite a bit for your heart to heal. Sorry...

[imagood1]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

I don't tell anyone in my life about my weight loss because it doesn't effect them the way it does me. I've learned after 3 marriages to be happy for yourself -- don't expect people to be happy for you .... that way you won't get hurt when you don't get the feedback you were looking for.

[IrishIrish]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

This is why we do this for ourselves and not for anyone else! Feel good about your accomplishments and discount the expectations of others who can't support your health improvements.

I keep telling myself that "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results". I was reminded of it when a guy came up to me at the health club where I work out ... he couldn't figure out where he knew me from and played twenty questions but I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of telling him who I was. He is a friend of a friend and said some pretty unkind things about me when I was beginning Atkins. I do remember him and one day, I will tell him what an *** he was to me.

[neutronnorman]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

I don't tell anyone in my life about my weight loss because it doesn't effect them the way it does me. I've learned after 3 marriages to be happy for yourself -- don't expect people to be happy for you .... that way you won't get hurt when you don't get the feedback you were looking for.

Envy and jealousy are the true diet saboteurs.

[kaylasgram]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

Thanks to all of you for your Input, it really helps me to put things into a new light!!!

I did start out doing this for myself & only myself & my health!!!

In the end 40.8 more pounds I will have only myself to say Thank You for the end results of 90 pounds lost!!!

Have a GREAT Atkins Whole Foods Filled Monday Everyone!!!

~Cindi~

[Christine Ann]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

Hey Cindi,
Thanks for your post. I too get very disappointed in the lack of support from
others. I am 5'4" and I started 7 weeks ago at 160lbs and am now down to
145lbs...my goal is 125lbs and I KNOW I will get there but as you know it
takes dedication and discipline to be successful and when the acknowledgement
from others is "lack luster" it can be discouraging.
About 2 weeks in I came to the realization that I s/b and now am my own
biggest fan. I am doing this for my health and my self esteem so any time you
get down feel free to contact me because as a fellow Atkins participant I know
what you are feeling!!

[kaylasgram]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

Christine Ann ~ Thanks sooooo much & the door opens both ways so to speak, Iam here for you as well if you ever need to chat!!!

~Cindi~

[OzLover]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

Congrats on your success Kayla! Poo on the ex~~his loss as far as I'm concerned. Keep up the great work!

[chinadoll]

Re: Feeling A Little Blu Today & Needing Some Input!!!

Sounds like you went to the wrong person for support. If he didn't support it before it must be tough for him to admit that he was wrong and you are doing something terrific by following this WOE. Therefore his reply did exactly what it was supposed to do--put you in your place for having done something he didn't agree with anyway. He wants you to feel like your effort is wasted and it sounds like he is succeeding.

Not to say he is a bad guy but he does have his pride. Bottom line is you need to be happy with your life choices for your reasons and not go to others for validation. Easier said than done I know. But if you want and need the external validation go to a supportive other or this board or some other place where people appreciate your efforts and accomplishments and not to those who never "got it" in the first place because they will never get it and you are the one feeling deflated.

By the way, I am VERY proud of what you have done and know what has gone into getting there. So give in a mental "what does he know anyway" and forge onwards.