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  • Family Support?

    I have been on a Carbohydrate controlled WOE since the beginning of January. I didn't realize that I was basically doing Atkins until I was about three weeks in, which means I never did induction properly. I still lost about 13 lbs in the first two weeks just by cutting out the food that I knew was carbs (like bread, potatoes, sweets, beer, juice etc.) Anyways, now that I've read the book, I know what's going on with my body, and I know how to continue on the road to success. I only have a small amount of weight to lose, but now that I've started, it's important to me to continue.

    My spouse has been "supportive" of me wanting to loose weight so that I can feel like I look better. She says that my weight/size are not important to her, but if they are important to me, then she supports me. She has been getting sick of me talking about the Atkins WOE. She told me last night that I was obsessed and she didn't like it. When I mentioned that I would like a small carton of heavy cream when she goes grocery shopping, she flipped out! "That's pure FAT!" I have been really excited about the WOE, and I have been telling lots of people how great it is, how good I feel etc. I know I have an obsessive personality, and I can take things like this too far, but I have been pretty good, and since I started journaling my foods, I feel even better about my progress.

    The other day, when we had company, she made a dish we used to eat a lot. Rotini noodles in a blush sauce w/ cheese, served with garlic bread. I wasn't tempted at all, and she knew that I was going to make myself something else. When I asked her if she enjoyed the meal she rolled her eyes in 'pleasure' and nodded. I wonder if she resents me for my new WOE. I have been making her rice/noodles etc. to go with the meals I have been preparing. She used to prepare most of the meals, but now that I "require" a certain diet, I have been preparing the meals.

    What have others done about lack of support from their partners? I can only see it getting worse. She just can't wait for me to eat a serving of rice, or whole wheat bread or something. She's asked me "So, when you've lost your weight you're going to come off this Atkins' thing right?"

    What can I do aside from keeping my excitement about the WOE to myself? Will it be enough to just journal, plan meals, and weight myself in secret!!! This is supposed to be a forever thing! Will she be happy enough when I am eating long grain rice and the occasional potato in Lifetime MTCE, or will she expect me to go back to my old WOE minus the "junk". I could give up sweets, beer, juice, and white bread forever and she would be happy, but she wants me to have "healthy grains". Is there a way I can illustrate to her what I "might" be eating, with a moderate metabolic resistance, on Lifetime maintenance?

    Thanks for the input...
    Farls,

    P.S. What do you guys think about not having done induction properly?
    <fitday link


  • #2
    Re: Family Support?

    >>she wants me to have "healthy grains">>

    Why does she feel that grains are healthy?

    >>"So, when you've lost your weight you're going to come off this Atkins' thing right?"
    >>

    Lots of people say/think that (even people "doing" Atkins). It's because they don't understand what Atkins is.

    >>What do you guys think about not having done induction properly?>>

    I don't think it has to keep one from being successful with their long term goals.

    >>She has been getting sick of me talking about the Atkins WOE.>>

    Then don't talk about it. From experience, I'm surprised I still have friends from the first year I was doing this.

    >>hen I mentioned that I would like a small carton of heavy cream when she goes grocery shopping, she flipped ou>>

    Then go shopping yourself.

    >> I wonder if she resents me for my new WOE.>>

    She wouldn't be the first spouse/partner to feel that way.

    >>Will it be enough to just journal, plan meals, and weight myself in secret!!!>>

    If you're relying on her to cook for you, she really has to be a true partner in your "way of eating".

    >>Is there a way I can illustrate to her what I "might" be eating, with a moderate metabolic resistance, on Lifetime maintenance?>>

    Have her read the book. Or maybe even a copy of "Atkins for Life".
    J.

    "Your life will never change until you change your choices."

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Family Support?

      She has, in the past, done a lot of the cooking, but since I started this WOE, I have been pretty "picky", so I have made probably 50% of the meals, and created a suppliment meal for myself when part of the meal was not aligned with my WOE.

      She eats the "Canada Food Guide" as much as possible. Her metabolism is amazing, and she is a tiny thing. Lucky her right... Controlled carbs doesn't mean I won't eat grains on Lifetime maintenance, or even pre-maintenance.

      As an aside, it seems to be too late now to change the fact that I jumped into Atkins essentially at OWL.... I lost the typical weight during the first few weeks of my diet. If, in the future, I find that I am creeping up to the 5 lb top weight and need to, I will do Induction, and I will do it properly. Until then, there's not much I can do about having missed out on it.
      <fitday link

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      • #4
        Re: Family Support?

        I think not having done induction properly is nothing to worry about now if you are doing rung 4 properly and losing (remember to eat plenty of veggies)

        As for the family - that can be tough. I realized that when I started I was a bit obsessed and overly sensitive and I had to check myself a few times. I also had to get very honest to my DH about how I felt about some of the choices he was making. I did make it clear that these were MY feeling and I was struggling with certain issues. He understood and made some concessions and things got better. But the time really helped. Now my family is very used to my choices and help me along. And I am not so sensitive when they make certain choices for themselves.
        Startdate: November 18, 2007. Female 5'2"

        May Challenges 2010
        Push-ups: 450/800
        Abs: 850/1900
        Squats: 650/1200
        Lunges: 500/1000
        Strength: 490/1200
        Running: 50/100 km


        2 Years on Atkins.................. President Challenge Medals earned

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        • #5
          Re: Family Support?

          >>ontrolled carbs doesn't mean I won't eat grains on Lifetime maintenance, or even pre-maintenance.>>

          It might, though.

          >>If, in the future, I find that I am creeping up to the 5 lb top weight and need to, I will do Induction, and I will do it properly.>>

          No ... you would simply drop back 5 net carbs. You don't "redo" Induction and start over!

          >>there's not much I can do about having missed out on it.>>

          And you shouldn't fret about it!
          J.

          "Your life will never change until you change your choices."

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Family Support?

            "By the book" Doesn't Dr. Atkins say that during lifetime mtce, if you exceed your maximum weight that you should start induction? I just finished the chapter on Lifetime MTCE and I thought that's what I read? Did I read it wrong? I don't have the book in my hands so I can't "quote" it.
            <fitday link

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            • #7
              Re: Family Support?

              >>Doesn't Dr. Atkins say that during lifetime mtce, if you exceed your maximum weight that you should start induction? I>>

              In the PreMaintenance chapter he talks about going back a "level".

              "If you gain weight, drop back to the next lowest level of carb intake."

              In the Maintenance chapter, maintenance will

              "teach you how to drop back to an earlier weight loss phase, when needed, to achieve lifetime weight control."

              Then he writes:

              "Here's what I recommend to my patients when they begin Lifetime Maintenance: Promise to weigh yourself at least once a week. Choose a lifetime weight range of 5 pounds, the low number being your goal weight. The higher number will be your maximum allowable weight. Whenever you reach the higher number, you must promise that, within a week, you will begin the Induction phase and quickly switch to OWL until you again reach your goal weight. Do this and you will never have more than 5 pounds to lose."

              Keep in mind that "abuse of Induction" can be insidious.
              J.

              "Your life will never change until you change your choices."

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Family Support?

                Roger that, I don't want to crash diet off 5 lbs if I can help it, and I also don't want to let it get out of control. I hope that when I get nearer to my goal, I can stop weighing myself morning and night... As I said before I am a little "obsessed" right now. It is very exciting after all.
                <fitday link

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                • #9
                  Re: Family Support?

                  Lots of spouses don't like their spouses changing. Because personalities naturally change at least for a while. I think in many ways the resent it for whatever insecure reasons they have inside. I'm sure it will eventually settle down as she adjusts to your new lifestyle and you level off on your excitement and settle into a life long eating pattern.

                  I have a few family member who try to sabotage me, I don't think they even realize they are doing it but I just smile and go on with my regular eating. DH is on this too but I've been on diets without him before and there were times when he'd push me to go off for whatever reason. The last few years I've just had to set my foot down and let him know I'm doing this for me, not him.

                  Set her down and tell her you have fully supported her WOE all this time (I assume you have) and you are just asking her for the same support. Then let her think about that while.
                  Atkins Start date: 01/18/2010--Now off plan for med reasons, still an Atkins lover!
                  Female-37 yrs-4'11"
                  HW-240/SW-169/CW-143.0/GW-125

                  Mini Goals

                  159---Hit 02/08/2010 Woohoo
                  149---Hit 03/08/2010 YES!
                  139
                  129





                  Highest weight till now



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                  • #10
                    Re: Family Support?

                    Thanks for the advice. When things settle down more, and I stop going on and on about this WOE, then maybe we can have a conversation about it. Until then, any conversation about it will come off as obsessing. Perhaps rightly so. Regardless, your posts have all been encouraging.
                    <fitday link

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                    • #11
                      Re: Family Support?

                      I know where you are coming from and it is really difficult when family don't understand and ask questions like you can't eat fruit? but you want a cooked breakfast? All you can do is smile and the weight loss and the way you feel will show it's making you happy and working! My partner annoys me sometimes and I think he worries about me losing weight!..strange but a common issue! so don't worry hang on in there! congratulations on the weight loss so far and just tell her this is working for you and making you happy and I am sure she will come round to it!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: Family Support?

                        it can be stressful for people when they have to relearn everything which has to do with healthy eating

                        also i find one of the common things people get caught off gaurd with is this scroll down till you see the post i made


                        also here on page 2 is useful info about the dangers of soy



                        anyways imo your on the right path learning more and more and geting more healthy im sure your spouse will come around i hope

                        also you say your spouses metabolism is amazing and shes basically skinny right? but did you know people can be skinny fat? if she does not work out she could easily have a high body fat %

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                        • #13
                          Re: Family Support?

                          Many folk think atkins is all about induction and only induction cause they have not read the book.

                          maybe you could explain about the phases of atkins to her so she knows you are planning on adding back healthy carbs from lower glycemic ones to higher in a controlled manner an that is what you are doing right now.
                          You could ask her to be part of your Atkins support team and help you make that adjustment as you move through OWL and pre.
                          by the book atkinseer

                          started 6/1/02 at 313
                          goalie 5/04 at 167 with under 15% body fat ADBB Presidents exercise Challenge


                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: Family Support?

                            I will, thanks. It sounds so normal when you put it that way. She understands glycemic index, so it shouldn't be hard.

                            She eats well, practically follows the food guide to the letter, doesn't really eat junk, or drink junk. She doesn't drink alcohol at all, so that makes a difference in her metabolism too. Anyways her WOE works for her, and I hope that this new WOE works for me!

                            I have worked out four days this week for 45 mins each including some floor exercises which I haven't done since I was in the (CDN) militia.
                            <fitday link

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                            • #15
                              Re: Family Support?

                              when she makes a comment like the one about your cream you can reasure her by letting her know your Atkins has limits on the amount of it you can consume each day so you will not be over doing it. that should ease her mind
                              by the book atkinseer

                              started 6/1/02 at 313
                              goalie 5/04 at 167 with under 15% body fat ADBB Presidents exercise Challenge


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