Is skinny smaller than thin?

[JaxMama]

My husband finally said I looked "thinner" tonight. This is his first remark in 3 months and 13 lbs. I know his motive for saying this and unfortunetly for him it didn't work.

So I asked him why now and why "thinner"? "Why don't I don't look skinny"? Most people who see me automatically say, you look so skinny!

He (DH) said that skinny means someone who needs to eat more, they are too skinny for their body type. Me, I just look thinner to him. Not thin, just thinner.

This led me to believe he thinks I am not as skinny as I could be. I should have guessed it this morning when I told him how much I weighed and asked him how much more I should lose. He didn't have an answer...

I always exchanged skinny and thin as the same.

When someone sees any of you losing weight, what do they say? Skinny, Thin, something else?

I have no idea what kind of reaction I will get but I was just taken back by his comments.

[CalicoPrairie]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

Someone told me that I'm "tiny", which was sort of weird.

JaxMama, hang in there and try not to let your DH's comments tell you what to think about yourself, k?

How tall are you?

[Jules1980]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

My husband finally said I looked "thinner" tonight. This is his first remark in 3 months and 13 lbs. I know his motive for saying this and unfortunetly for him it didn't work.

So I asked him why now and why "thinner"? "Why don't I don't look skinny"? Most people who see me automatically say, you look so skinny!

He (DH) said that skinny means someone who needs to eat more, they are too skinny for their body type. Me, I just look thinner to him. Not thin, just thinner.

This led me to believe he thinks I am not as skinny as I could be. I should have guessed it this morning when I told him how much I weighed and asked him how much more I should lose. He didn't have an answer...

I always exchanged skinny and thin as the same.

When someone sees any of you losing weight, what do they say? Skinny, Thin, something else?

I have no idea what kind of reaction I will get but I was just taken back by his comments.

LOL my bf is no diff! He hasn't mentioned anything to me either! I've lost a good amount of inches and weight and still no comment from him
My friends and family say...WOW your losing weight! Looks good, or Wow look at you!
I'd love to hear skinny or thin, even thinner! But alas...nothing yet From him anyways lol
Men are weird I guess!

[LageNomAi]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

I've actually always preferred the term "thinner" to "skinny." For whatever reason, "skinny" always strikes me as a negative, as though it's appropriate for someone who actually needs to gain a few pounds. "Thinner" implies that I've improved on what I already had, slimmed down.

I dunno. I will say that without the benefit of knowing the dynamics of your relationship with your H, it does sound as though you might be overreacting a wee bit to his choice of words. But as an outsider, I realize there are probably a great number of dynamics at work there with which I'm not familiar.

Keep up the good work!

[mizski]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

I dunno. I will say that without the benefit of knowing the dynamics of your relationship with your H, it does sound as though you might be overreacting a wee bit to his choice of words. But as an outsider, I realize there are probably a great number of dynamics at work there with which I'm not familiar.

After decades of marriage one of the (many) things I've learned is that men don't often give the compliments we want to hear. They think they are doing well but I really believe that parts of their brains are missing. And they are hurt that you are hurt and moreso they are majorly confused because they think they did good.

Weight and how do I look questions are ones that men dread. Probably rightfully so because we never seem happy with whatever they say. I would forget it and just give him a little smooch.

When someone sees any of you losing weight, what do they say? Skinny, Thin, something else?

From people like the neighbors I get, "Wow, you are losing weight." It's around 80#s...ya think??? Oh well, I learned long ago to never pay much attention to what others say.

[ziggy]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

my mom says im WAY to skinny. and my dad says i still got fat to lose and that i eat way more than a normal person and should try eating less

i like my dads comments most though cause there true

also i asked my dad if i looked better than the average guy and he said yes

anyways i know i can do more i have gone back to induction or rung 1 cause for me that was the only time i was able to lose fat. that and exercising my muscles at the gym helped get rid of body fat

im also trying to eat less

[lannerjarv]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

skinny means you need to eat more.. thin is generally "healthy".


my hubby says "you are looking SO great!" or "you are really slimming down" or "you are looking very fit". he doesn't use words like skinny or thin.

mind you he's very complimentary and the first to bring up my successes with everyone. lol

[justaperson]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

Hi,

Comming from multi generations of larger people, skinny, has always means unhealthy to my family. Thin, to me at least, means healthy. When I am asked by my wife about how she looks I always reply with a heart felt "Wow". Because that is how I feel and it's the least she deserves for picking a slob live me.

David

[hippychikforever]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

Skinny & thin are not terms never used in my house. I'm still at the beginning stage but I've gotten "Wow! You look great" , "I can see you're losing" and from hubby "You are so beautiful" & "I am so proud of you". Guess which ones are my favorite?!

[MarlaSinger]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

In regards to spouses/significant others and compliments on weight loss, here are my thoughts-

He/she likely didn't notice when you were gaining, so this is just not that important to him/her. He/she loves you for you, and a few (or even a lot of) extra pounds doesn't change who you are, or what they love about you. My husband didn't follow me into the bathroom to weigh myself when I jumped from 245 to 250, so if he did it now, it would feel weird, like he's been anticipating a potential loss as much as I am. My husband wouldn't be husband if he walked up to me once a week and put his hands around my upper arm to do a quick, dirty measurement. To him, it's irrelevant. I prefer it this way.

I can't remember if was a line in a movie, lyric in a song or poem or a comedian that said that your spouse/SO is the only one who can look at you bald and gray, with a paunch and jowls, gray saggy skin and still see you as the vibrant person they met. I think there is a lot of truth to this. I am not constantly sizing my husband up when I look at him. To me, looking at him is something I associate with wonderful, lovely, adorable, sweet, sexy and handsome no matter what.

Spouses/SO see us on a daily basis and change is very difficult to gauge when you are this close up. Parents of infants experience this... baby just looks like baby all the time, but when grandma comes over or the neighbor spots him they exclaim, "Oh my, he's getting so big!" It's difficult to take that step back to see this kind of change - even when it's obvious (buying larger clothing, larger diapers, feedings/food intake growing logarithmically.) - - - Case in point, how many people post here in the before/after section and ask if they look any different? From the perspective of we outsiders, we can see the drastic changes. You very well may look at the same exact images of yourself and not see much difference. I don't think it's too far off that those who we are with constantly actually 'see' anything but the same drastic differences. So yeah, I would expect more distant family members and friends to gush over your 10% body weight loss but not your spouse/SO.

I say this as my husband told me yesterday that since he's started to golf this spring, he's dropped about 8 pounds - which is half/more than half of what he felt he needed to lose. After he mentioned it, I took a good hard look at him and noticed - but only after he told me. This is a major loss for him and I didn't notice. Does that make me a bad wife?

[JaxMama]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

LOL what a response.

And just FYI, I am not upset by his comment. It just took me back. And wanted to know what people thought about thin/skinny!

Of course out of everyone I know I would like him to be the most supportive, but it's not in his genes. I went from 160 to 134 (since Jan 2009). There is a HUGE difference. I don't have any extra arm fat or a left over belly fat from giving birth to our kid. You can actually see a I have a tight abdomen area. But since the fat I still have on my thighs are still prevelent maybe that is what he was referring to as thinner but not skinny. I don't know. Iam my own worst critic anyway.

But yes I agree with most of you that if my husband lost 10 lbs I probably wouldn't notice. So why would he? And he didn't notice my weight gain because I was pregnant when I gained it all.

To answer calico: I am 5'6"

To respond to Lanner: you have a very nice husband!

So I see most of you agree skinny mean "eat more" and has a bad connotation. But thin is a positive remark. Thanks for responding!

[CalicoPrairie]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

Amen, Marla!

My husband is not a "noticer" either--but then again, he also told me that if I were 300lbs he wouldn't care, as long as I was healthy (kind of an oxymoron, but that's beside the point--it was very sweet). So I wholeheartedly agree with Marla's statements, and encourage you to try not to gauge success on what others can see, but on what YOU can see, and in the work that you have completed for yourself, in yourself.

[Carne!]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

Jax, I think you're looking too much into it. He meant it as a compliment. Take it!

[CalicoPrairie]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

To answer calico: I am 5'6"

Ahh ok, so you are hoping to get to the lower end of your healthy weight then. I'm 5' 5-1/2" and I'm just hoping to get to your current weight, which is still something like 20lbs over the lowest end of my healthy weight for my height (according to FitdayPC, it's 112.something). I think you are doing awesome!

[JaxMama]

Re: Is skinny smaller than thin?

I took the compliment, don't worry. They are few and far between with him. Like once in a year. And again I didn't go to bed crying or anything.

I just wanted opinions on what skinny/thin meant to you