My mother was just diagnosed with Breast Cancer

[Oh.2.B.Fit]

Re: My mother was just diagnosed with Breast Cancer

And you are doing better now hon? Everything is ok? . What is funny or sad is this, my mom has been a volunteer making cancer head hats or those things for cancer patients for years, now she will be making one herself. I really feel so hurt for my mother.

I am much better, thank you In 2001 I developed a very rare form of heart failure called Post Partum Cardiomyopathy, from giving birth to my daughter Serena. I was given one month to live, and here I am I completely recovered, but it was a very long difficult road. My hair came back, but thin. You know what though, I can live with thin hair If it gets to thin I'll shave it off and be bald and beautiful!!!

[Oh.2.B.Fit]

Re: My mother was just diagnosed with Breast Cancer

Do they feel like a breast? I really thought women had to live with the amputation?

They feel like she had a boob job. Women who get boob jobs, there breasts feel a little hard because of the implant. They reconstruct a nipple (it doesn't have the same sensation as a real nipple), and they color it (like tatoo color) the nipple so it looks like the other one. It really does look good. What they did with Michelle was put like a balloon in right after they removed her breast (because all that skin is gone and they need to stretch it out again to make a new breast) and over several months they put fluid in it. A little at a time so the skin can be stretched back out. It really didn't hurt because they do it slowly and over a period of time. I hope all that makes sense. It can be hard to explain. Just know there is ALWAYS, ALWAYS hope. Don't let anyone ever take that away. I should have died, one month they gave me, and here I am, better than ever. My friend Michelle after breast cancer has never been healthier

[squeak]

Re: My mother was just diagnosed with Breast Cancer

They feel like she had a boob job. Women who get boob jobs, there breasts feel a little hard because of the implant. They reconstruct a nipple (it doesn't have the same sensation as a real nipple), and they color it (like tatoo color) the nipple so it looks like the other one. It really does look good. What they did with Michelle was put like a balloon in right after they removed her breast (because all that skin is gone and they need to stretch it out again to make a new breast) and over several months they put fluid in it. A little at a time so the skin can be stretched back out. It really didn't hurt because they do it slowly and over a period of time. I hope all that makes sense. It can be hard to explain. Just know there is ALWAYS, ALWAYS hope. Don't let anyone ever take that away. I should have died, one month they gave me, and here I am, better than ever. My friend Michelle after breast cancer has never been healthier

Hon, you are such an INSPIRATION to me and other women, and I love your strong desire to live and laugh. And you are right, about the bald, you can always go bald or even get a wig IF that hair problem comes back. But keep praying it wont sometimes faith can conquer anything, it just sometimes we fall weak to having faith, you know what I mean?

Did your friend have the same infiltrating ductal carcinoma cancer as my mother? Why does my mom have to take so many months of chemo? Is this normal? I wonder for a 72 nearly 73 year old if they will just say no to a reconstructed breast? or maybe it is up to the individual to ask for it . I have rest the decision in the hands of the lord to help my mother decide her own faith. If not and I keep worrying I will become ILL myself. Now it does not mean I wont freak the heck out again, I prolly will. Just TODAY I feel a bit at ease. But my question is still is this mistaken the 6 months of chemo or is it 6 weeks? I read here on this thread somebody had 6 weeks and was it for the same type of cancer? Moms own is stage 2

[Oh.2.B.Fit]

Re: My mother was just diagnosed with Breast Cancer

Hon, you are such an INSPIRATION to me and other women, and I love your strong desire to live and laugh. And you are right, about the bald, you can always go bald or even get a wig IF that hair problem comes back. But keep praying it wont sometimes faith can conquer anything, it just sometimes we fall weak to having faith, you know what I mean?

Did your friend have the same infiltrating ductal carcinoma cancer as my mother? Why does my mom have to take so many months of chemo? Is this normal? I wonder for a 72 nearly 73 year old if they will just say no to a reconstructed breast? or maybe it is up to the individual to ask for it . I have rest the decision in the hands of the lord to help my mother decide her own faith. If not and I keep worrying I will become ILL myself. Now it does not mean I wont freak the heck out again, I prolly will. Just TODAY I feel a bit at ease. But my question is still is this mistaken the 6 months of chemo or is it 6 weeks? I read here on this thread somebody had 6 weeks and was it for the same type of cancer? Moms own is stage 2

Thank you, and I'm so glad ur feeling better
I don't know how long chemo is. My friend refused chemo even though ALL of her Dr. insisted she get it. And I don't remember now what type of cancer it was called but I can ask for you. I know it wasn't the kind that mirrors itself so they weren't to worried about her other breast altho she could get it in that breast too. I know when my friend, Danny had chemo for throat cancer it wasn't more than 2 months of the chemo, so maybe it is just for the 6 weeks. I think your mom should be able to have reconstructive surgery if that's what she wants no matter her age. She could still have many many years ahead of her and she should be happy with her body
You're all in my prayers. I hope you hear from her soon and that it easis some of your pain and worries

[squeak]

Re: My mother was just diagnosed with Breast Cancer

Thank you, and I'm so glad ur feeling better
I don't know how long chemo is. My friend refused chemo even though ALL of her Dr. insisted she get it. And I don't remember now what type of cancer it was called but I can ask for you. I know it wasn't the kind that mirrors itself so they weren't to worried about her other breast altho she could get it in that breast too. I know when my friend, Danny had chemo for throat cancer it wasn't more than 2 months of the chemo, so maybe it is just for the 6 weeks. I think your mom should be able to have reconstructive surgery if that's what she wants no matter her age. She could still have many many years ahead of her and she should be happy with her body
You're all in my prayers. I hope you hear from her soon and that it easis some of your pain and worries

Oh you are so sweet, your words are so encouraging really are. I am hoping it is not 6 month of therapy, I find that a bit long for stage two dont you? maybe my sister misunderstood. Well I felt bad today and good and bad, but mainly bad, cried a good bit, just feeling frustrated that I cant get in touch with her.

I woke up today to a very shocking scale reading dropped 2lbs overnight. How I dont know, could be stress or worries. My faces looks sucked in like a sick woman. I dont want to look like this. So today I binged but mainly atkins foods, about 10oz of chicken breast fried in olive oil, 4 crisp bread 2.3 carbs per slice, peanut butter 1tblsp, blue cheese 0 carbs, avocado, 1 apple, eggs but I ate and ate and ate, at lesat I didnt cheat nearly drank a lot of grapejuice but opted for water . I slept better last night than I had in days.

If you could find out what type she had I would like that. But which friend did you have then that had 9 months of chemo?

[Mickkey]

Re: My mother was just diagnosed with Breast Cancer

Thank you very much. I am and never will be able to get reports from her doctors. One particular sister who was never there for my mother or father and never treated them well is not brain washing my mother who is weak, confused and vulnerable. She does not care about my mothers health but her own selfishness about what if mommy dies. So she has convinced mommy to go out to Seattle, a strange city, no friends, no other family, not her doctors etc. Mommy jumped on a plane yesterday without a word to her other children. I was shocked about this. This one sister lives in isolation fromt he rest of the family. WE DONT KNOW HER PHONE NUMBER or address, so all we know is mom is somewhere in the state of Washington. How SAD, this is driving me mad becaue I love my mother and was ready to jump on aplane and fly across the atlantic to be with her. But this one wicked sister has somehow convinced my mother to be there insteaed. She is pushing in her head that the only good doctors are in Seattle and that the rest of the USA will kill her. I am horrified to think that this may be the end of her? I mean, we have no contact, no way to make communication, this leaves me and the rest of my siblings in a very awful situation. I tried to tell mommy do not go out there. That this one sister will not even let us speak to her EVEN if we had her phone number to call, so why go? for some reason the shock of the cancer has messed with moms head adn she is not in her right mind. As for getting data from her doctor. HA that wont be happening as long as this sister is in CONTROL...we may as well say goodbye to mommy now. I am so hurt I couldnt sleep, I vomited all my dinner and cried, tossed and turned. I feel like the whole world has a dark black could over it and I cant see any light. It is one thing is this sister meant WELL, but she doesnt. she is only interested in having mommy there to pacify her own self. Mommy knows that going to that houshold is a one way ticket to ****. I dont understand how she let this happen?

Maybe in some days she will come to reality and realize NOBODY can call and she is only with taht one, maybe she will wisen up? God knows I hope so. Flying to Oklahoma is far cheaper and faster than trying to fly somewhere in god knows where in seattle.

Mom must have the breast removed as there are three tumors. so she will also need psychological help, this one sister will FORBID IT. Basically, mommy will be in her control for her to decide, and when someone is that sick, they may not even realize what they are doing and how much control of their own life and health they are doing.

Help, I feel like I am losing it.

Hi dear, I couldn't sleep this evening and was just checking in to see how you were doing and read this. Oh hon, I hope your Mother has called you by this time. If not, realize that you are being a good daughter regardless and this doesn't mean you don't care. One thing that's hard to accept is that this entire situation is out of your hands. You have no control over anything here. That was hard for me, plus the guilt of being so far away. I know you're hurt, but she's probably just confused and frightened right now and probably doesn't know which way to turn. She's thinking of just herself right now, and fear is pushing out thoughts of others.

Here's something good I can tell you, and that is when a woman is past menopause (which your mom would be in her 70's) the odds of the cancer traveling is small. Not that it doesn't ever happen, but the odds are smaller than for a woman who still has horomones coursing through her body. So there's a bright spot.

I also think a woman can have reconstuctive surgery at any age. I don't think it would be refused if a woman wanted it, unless there were other reasons, like poor health, no insurance. My Mother didn't want it. She said, "ah, it's done it's job. I don't need it anymore." This is a woman who is big busted, (and admired for her figure), but she nursed five kids and to her that was it. I would want it, just because it would feel so strange physically without it. But, to each his own. My Mother didn't have to take any chemo either. She did take a drug that is very effective at keeping cancer from re-accruing... I think it's called Interferon. Your Mother may not need chemo at all.

One thing that would help you and her is for you to think nothing but positive thoughts. I know it's hard. But, every time doubt and fear come into your mind, replace it with a good thought. Talk positive to yourself. Thoughts are powerful. Have you ever thought something like, I can't do this, I can't do this, until you've talked yourself into NOT being able to do it? You can do the same with positive talk. Think...she's going to be ok, she'll live to a ripe old age, she'll make it through this and be healthier than ever, whatever thought will make it positive for you and her.

Let us know how things are going. Talk later. Stay strong, things will get better.