Dog Diary/Cat Diary

[sadie147]

> Dog's DIARY
>
> 8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
> 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
> 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
> 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
> 12:00 PM - Lunch! My favorite thing!
> 1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
> 3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
> 5:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
> 7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
> 8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
> 11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
>
>
>
>
> Cat's DIARY
>
> Day 983 of my captivity.
>
> My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
> They dine lavishly on fresh meat-while the other inmates and I are fed
> hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the
> rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to
> keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of
> escape.
>
> In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
> Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet.
> I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly
> demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
> condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.
> Bastards!
>
> There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
> placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I
> could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my
> confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this
> means and how to use it to my advantage.
>
> Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
> tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try
> this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
>
> I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
>
> The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
> seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously an idiot.

[Lyssie]

Re: Dog Diary/Cat Diary

I love this email.

[blueberrylady]

Re: Dog Diary/Cat Diary

Great post, Sadie. I loved it.

Although my cat sometimes seems to think that way, she seems to be more content curled up on the couch these days than out in our 4° above zero weather!

(By the way, for anyone who doesn't know how to make the degree sign, °, just hold the control key down while you type 248 and it will appear at least on most keyboards. Neat, huh?)

[Lisa]

Re: Dog Diary/Cat Diary

That's a fun one.