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I don't know if many of you remember me from a long time ago, but I remember a lot of you and all the help and reassurance that you have given me throughout the time I was on here.
Well, I managed to lose a lot of weight until I was 148 pounds and then something happened and I just started gaining weight from that point on. I guess it was all the stress from work and all the other stuff that was going on in my life. My boyfriend can't reassure me on this way of life when I do it. He says that it's very unhealthy for me to be doing it and way conformist and what not. I am not a person who conforms to anything, but when I see that something has worked so well in the past, I do it. And here I am writing to each and everyone of you that I want to do this. I don't want to weigh 195 pounds anymore. I want to be able to wear clothes that will make me look good and feel comfortable with myself. I am so depressed right now because I feel so fat and I feel so ugly. I don't know what to do anymore. I want that sense of reassurement again that I had from you guys for so long ago and I know it hasn't gone away. I am going to start this way of life again and I will do it until I reach my goal of 120 pounds. I will not let anything stop me and if this causes a rift between my boyfriend and I, then I suppose he will have to understand that I am doing what's best for me. I don't want my parents being mad at me anymore for not following a way of eating. Well, today is the last day I will eat bad food that I am addicted to! I can't stand feeling horrible every single day of my life! I need to live and I need to lose weight.
And now I am crying, like I always do...Thanks for everyone who replies, it means a lot to me. I want this so bad now. I am willing to do anything.
Well, I managed to lose a lot of weight until I was 148 pounds and then something happened and I just started gaining weight from that point on. I guess it was all the stress from work and all the other stuff that was going on in my life. My boyfriend can't reassure me on this way of life when I do it. He says that it's very unhealthy for me to be doing it and way conformist and what not. I am not a person who conforms to anything, but when I see that something has worked so well in the past, I do it. And here I am writing to each and everyone of you that I want to do this. I don't want to weigh 195 pounds anymore. I want to be able to wear clothes that will make me look good and feel comfortable with myself. I am so depressed right now because I feel so fat and I feel so ugly. I don't know what to do anymore. I want that sense of reassurement again that I had from you guys for so long ago and I know it hasn't gone away. I am going to start this way of life again and I will do it until I reach my goal of 120 pounds. I will not let anything stop me and if this causes a rift between my boyfriend and I, then I suppose he will have to understand that I am doing what's best for me. I don't want my parents being mad at me anymore for not following a way of eating. Well, today is the last day I will eat bad food that I am addicted to! I can't stand feeling horrible every single day of my life! I need to live and I need to lose weight.
And now I am crying, like I always do...Thanks for everyone who replies, it means a lot to me. I want this so bad now. I am willing to do anything.
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