Tweet
Hello!
I'll knock the technical who/what/when/where/why stuff out first... I'm a 38 year old mommy of two beautiful girls who gave up a semi-interesting job in america to move to europe almost a year ago in support of my husband's career. While I love it here, I find myself hiding in my flat way too often, propped up in bed... pillows behind me, laptop in front of me... sound familiar anyone?? I'm here because I've finally worked through my shame, guilt, rationalizations and fear of failure and come to realize that... hey, I'm just not happy with myself the way I am. And life's too short to be unhappy and not attempt to do something about it.
And now, the rest of the story... I love where I live, love my family and, for the most part, love my life. But I do allow my size to keep me from doing things. I dread meeting new people, and up until a few months ago you would never have been able to get me to admit in an online forum the fact that I was overweight. But in doing that there's no room left to discuss something so central to you... something that consumes so much of your time & energy... that pretty soon you end up feeling even more trapped by your circumstances that you were before. I also live in a country where the obesity rate is almost non-existent. In other words, there's an army of tall, thin germans and then stubby little ole me trying not to stick out like a sore thumb. I always wanted to be unique, but this is not what I had in mind when in my 20's I said I wanted to stand out in a crowd.
So here I am- day 3 of induction. The monster hunger of the first two days seems to be subsiding and I've got my fingers crossed that I won't end up another statistic. You know the type... those who enthusiastically start a new way of eating only to have their resolve vanish as January turns to February and the call of jelly donuts and elastic waistbands becomes to great to resist. Seriously, for those of you who've done this for months & years... how do you find and keep your motivation? Because staying motivated & on course, I think, is my biggest obstacle. Well, that and resisting the siren song of yummy, yummy carbs.
I'll knock the technical who/what/when/where/why stuff out first... I'm a 38 year old mommy of two beautiful girls who gave up a semi-interesting job in america to move to europe almost a year ago in support of my husband's career. While I love it here, I find myself hiding in my flat way too often, propped up in bed... pillows behind me, laptop in front of me... sound familiar anyone?? I'm here because I've finally worked through my shame, guilt, rationalizations and fear of failure and come to realize that... hey, I'm just not happy with myself the way I am. And life's too short to be unhappy and not attempt to do something about it.
And now, the rest of the story... I love where I live, love my family and, for the most part, love my life. But I do allow my size to keep me from doing things. I dread meeting new people, and up until a few months ago you would never have been able to get me to admit in an online forum the fact that I was overweight. But in doing that there's no room left to discuss something so central to you... something that consumes so much of your time & energy... that pretty soon you end up feeling even more trapped by your circumstances that you were before. I also live in a country where the obesity rate is almost non-existent. In other words, there's an army of tall, thin germans and then stubby little ole me trying not to stick out like a sore thumb. I always wanted to be unique, but this is not what I had in mind when in my 20's I said I wanted to stand out in a crowd.
So here I am- day 3 of induction. The monster hunger of the first two days seems to be subsiding and I've got my fingers crossed that I won't end up another statistic. You know the type... those who enthusiastically start a new way of eating only to have their resolve vanish as January turns to February and the call of jelly donuts and elastic waistbands becomes to great to resist. Seriously, for those of you who've done this for months & years... how do you find and keep your motivation? Because staying motivated & on course, I think, is my biggest obstacle. Well, that and resisting the siren song of yummy, yummy carbs.
Comment