Shy and Overweight = Lonely

[toeyann1]

Hi! So introduce myself... huh..

Well, I am a 30 year old married woman with 1 daughter. I have been overweight most of my life and grew up in an overweight family. Other then the teasing I got at school I thought the way I lived was normal.

When I was pregnant with my daughter I had a very difficult time. I could not hold down any food or liquid and was in the hospital several times. I lost about 50lbs while pregnant and gained about 10 of that back in the last month for a total loss of 40 lbs during pregnancy. After giving birth to my daughter I became even more inactive then I already was. And now 5 years later I have not only put on the 40lbs I lost during pregnancy, but an additional 35lbs. I am now at my biggest I have ever been, and at my lowest in self-esteem. I hate getting undressed for any reason, including showering, but I hate the way clothes look on me. I do everything in my power to avoid looking in a mirror, even gone as far as getting a hairstyle that only requires brushing rather then styling. To sum it up, I am just uncomfortable in the skin I am in.

I am not the greatest dieter. Cravings are hard to overcome. Atkins is a wonderful thought of a program and I am beginning to change my eating habits already. I would not say I have yet to "DO" induction, but I am getting much closer at being able to do so without having to worry about giving in to my cravings and breaking my progress. Just in this small change in eating in the past month I have already dropped about 15lbs but I have a long way to go. I guess the reason for registering here is not only recipe ideas, but a bit of support in getting through induction to boot. My husband is not the greatest of supporters as for him they generally turn into lectures that only make me feel worse about myself. In short, I think what I need is.... a friend.

[cani]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

Hi Toeyann1,

Girl, you are not alone in your way of thinking and feeling about being overweight. So you will find many friends here and most importantly, you have begun making changes. 15 lbs in a month is AWESOME, good for you and great way to turn your thinking to the positive with little changes to get you revved up. Don't think of how far you feel you have to go, but instead look at how far you have come -- 15 pounds gone!!

There are many supporting concepts in play on this board, and i have also seen people speak about how many times their sig others aren't all that supportive so even there you have people who know what you are going through and there are many moms on this board.

So deep breath, and keep moving forward -- 15 lbs gone, you've signed up to a great support group and take it one day at a time.

cani

[toeyann1]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

Thank you very much for all of the kind words.

Crash dieting NEVER works for me. I am good for about 2 days, then I binge eat and end up gaining weight rather then losing. Like I said, the whole idea of Atkins is absolutley amazing to me. This sounds completely like a change I can make for my entire life. BUT, I decided that since this does sound so amazing, I was going to take a new approach. No crashing into this. I want to very much begin induction, but until I know I am completely mentally ready. I won't. I do not want to fail at this like every other thing I have tried and just end up heavier. So, I decided to make small goals for taking my biggest weaknesses like sugar, flour, potatoes and even caffiene out of my diet. I decided I would not look at Atkin's as a diet, but as a new life for me; and like most things new, it will take some breaking in. I have done very well and feel that induction for me is only days away. Overcoming the "You're a failure!" mentality my husband sets forth for me is probably a bigger obstacle sometimes.

Again, thank you.
Toeyann

[Slidesdownmountains]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

Wow - you have a really positive attitude to the obstacles you are facing which is great! Please keep logging into this forum - I know it has helped me enormously when I've felt that everyone was telling me how bad my diet was (as if stuffing myself with chocolates and bread was acceptable!)
If you don't have quite the support you need at home, please come and find it here - you will. In spades!

If it helps, I have done the induction several times, and starting is the hardest part for me, but even a day in, when (and I know I shouldn't) I step on the scales and see a significant difference, it does empower you and make you feel more in control.
I am always surprised at how little I think about food, and that I am not hungry - clearly I have been forgetting this when I have lapsed before!

Congratulations on your 15lbs - clearly you are a loser. Of weight! I am sure you will be very successful with your new healthy eating program. That'll show 'em!

[toeyann1]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

Obstacles are a part of every aspect in life I have noticed, so it would only be silly of me to think eating and losing weight would not be one of them. Just wish I would have realized sooner.

I have only been logging into the forums here since yesterday and I am already addicted to the positiveness, help, support and all around amazing people I have encountered. I can hardly bring myself to leave the computer to go eat (and a new rule of mine is no eating at the computer, only the kitchen table). There is so many helpful people here and so much wonderful information, it would take me a long time to go through it all. People I have encountered and even people I have yet to just by reading some of there posts have put me in a wonderful state of mind and have given me great hope and determination.

So, thanks to those I have and have not spoken with. You've already been a great help!

[tacfla]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

Toeyann1
Welcome as you know there is a great group of people here. You will get exactly what you need from everyone. Its a process and you know what works for you if you have not started induction yet, hey no problem you will get there. Congrats on the loss that is amazing keep up the good work.

Robin

[DLS]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

Toeyann1,
I'm sure with your great attitude you will do great. And coming here is a wonderful way to keep that great attitude and positive outlook. I have had days where I wanted to quit, to just run and eat everything in the dang house but these folks really help to keep you on track. Now I am able to jog! I can go all day and not be tired and lazy feeling. I thank God for this place and I know you can do it!
Sorry your hubby isn't supportive. I'm lucky that my whole family is so good to me about it. Wish I could get hubby to do it with me but at least he doesn't spoil my weightloss!

Best wishes!

[TammyinFlorida]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

I also am new here and I think as long as we can find friends here on this support board, we can do this. My husband also is not very supportive. But, you can do this. It really isnt that hard. Just JUMP ON!!!!

Good luck..

[bsquare12]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

Hi & Welcome

I'm only new here myself, but I'm sure you (and me) can find the help and support we need to keep us motivated.

I am on Day 5 of Atkins and 8lbs down. Only another 60-70 to go now lol

I get terribly upset by my weight (I'm not the heaviest I've been, I've been 35lbs heavier).

I got into a terrible spiral a few years back where I didn't want to go out, didn't want to socialise. I couldn't bear to look in the mirror and felt like getting dress sometimes was a waste of time because I looked/felt awful.

One day, something inside me just snapped, and I went on a low-carb diet, dropped 70lb and suddenly felt like I'd been given another chance back at life/excitement. Over time I hae regained some but not back to where I was. I'm now on this determined push before I hit 40 to have the best figure I've ever had in my life.

Stick with it and remind yourself when you get cravings, that your desire to be slimmer is greater than your desire for that piece of cake.

Take care.

Beverley x

[blueeyedvirgo]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

You are among friends here! I think all of us can relate to what you are feeling. Whether it be an unsupportive husband or sabotaging children (my son just stuck a bag of cheese puffs in my face and told me to take one. I went nuts and screamed 'Get that freaking bag out of my face' LOL).

I am to the point in my life where I do not want to socialize at all, broke up with my boyfriend because of the constant fighting about being intimate (sorry for the TMI) and I do not have energy to even clean my house the way I used to.

We are all in this together! On the road to recovery!

Leslie

[toeyann1]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

I can completely see the sabotaging child.. lol.. My daughter is 5 and she offers me things i cannot have, but not out of sabatage but out of the mere delight in sharing with her mom. It breaks my heart every time I tell her no and she looks so sad. It is not easy to explain to a 5 year old that you can't have something vs not wanting something.

[blueeyedvirgo]

Re: Shy and Overweight = Lonely

I can completely see the sabotaging child.. lol.. My daughter is 5 and she offers me things i cannot have, but not out of sabatage but out of the mere delight in sharing with her mom. It breaks my heart every time I tell her no and she looks so sad. It is not easy to explain to a 5 year old that you can't have something vs not wanting something.

My 14 year old son was definately sabotaging. He is chubby and told me today that he is jealous that I have stuck to the diet this long. He said my 'dunlap' looks like it is going away. LOL Dunlap used in a sentence = My stomach has 'done lapped' over my pants! Everytime I come out of the bathroom he asks 'what color were the sticks'...Hopefully my no carb eating will help him lose a few pounds. I would not want him to go on induction with me. Too restrictive for his age.