Its hard - but it can be done!

[dreamof145]

We all hear so many posts from people who say "I was doing fine until ____ happened, then I fell off the wagon."

I've found out how important it is to have back-up plans to get through these times. Right now, I'm facing a lot of turmoil in my life. My mother-in-law passed away this week. She was in her nineties and had alheimers. She was a very good mother-in-law. And...I am also having a time with my daughter. It's hard to be a parent and watch your kids make decisions that you know aren't healthy for them. I've found myself turning to my 'emergency plan' over and over. I've been walking, drinking lots of water and writing down my frustrations with a vengeance to keep me focused.

We never know what will happen from day to day. Thats why it is so important to have a plan to follow for times when your mind is fuzzy. I'm usually very Atkins oriented in my eating and thinking...however I can tell you that it would be very easy to blow it. But...I'm not going to. I am more determined than ever to keep to the plan. Its a life-saver to come here to the ADBB and re-charge my committment and get strength.

[LC_Dave]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

I'm sorry to here about your Mum in Law and your daughter troubles

You have brought up a very pertinent topic!
I guess writing down your troubles creates some 'you' time!

[fr1endly2]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

SORRY to hear about your Mother in law (((HUGS))))
and it sounds like things with your daughter are rough
too.
SOUNDS like your doing well and that you have ways
to combat your old eating habits thats awesome!
KEEP up the great work
lisa

[Laurenfra]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

(((((((((((((((((((Becky))))))))))))))))))))

[dreamof145]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

Yeah when I'm writing...I'm not eating. I use it for thereapy. I also put all my feelings out so I can set priorities in the issues and see what I can change and what I can't. Sounds corny...but thats the way my mind works.

My daughter is bi-polar and pregnant. The father of the baby is not a good choice for a life-partner. She is going to change the bad-boy and make him into a Saint. You all know the story. So many issues with her that I couldn't list them all...right now I am having the old problems of taking care of her (like I've always done) or taking care of me and letting her resolve her own problems and make her own mistakes. Its hard, but necessary.

Thanks everyone for your hugs. I needed them and will get through this. Thanks to my new strength in dealing with problems (without reaching for food)...I know that I am not super-woman and can't solve everyone's problems.

[slimndown]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

((((dream)))) I hear you!!! We are in similar boats, sweetie. My dad died just this Thursday and my DH Saint has turned into a bad boy. Any cheating???? Maybe a nibble here or there, but I've stayed on plan for the most part and have reaped the rewards. Stress can actually work for you when you're losing weight if you stay on track. I actually saw my hips disappear in 2 days while practically living at the hospital w/my dad because I stayed on track.

[Richt]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

My thoughts really are with you Becky. But congrats on putting it all down in words which must be so painful.

Rich

[hey_nelson]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

Thanks, in your sharing, I now have an idea what to do. When things get bad for me, I isolate, eat, then dig out... Thanks so much for your share.

love and prayers
patty

[ladyinred]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

{{{{{{{{Becky}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I'm so sorry about your MIL. You are such a sweetie. I'm sorry about your daughter too. It's hard to be a parent, but right now you have to put yourself first. You also owe it to your daughter to let her make her own mistakes. My mom wanted me to learn from her mistakes and thus not make any myself, but that's unrealistic, and it doesn't allow one to live their own life if they are living someone else's, if that makes sense. You sound like a wonderful parent though, and I know you will be there for your daughter when she needs you. And she will.

[softnred]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!



I'm so sorry that all this is going on Becky. I'm extra extra proud of you for sticking to plan and not letting the chaos knock you off the wagon.

Oh...and mental illness runs in my family...bi-polar disorder and schizophrenia, to be exact. My sister is bi-polar and has been in and out of the hospital for the past few years. My mom has turned into her caregiver, and it breaks my heart when I see mom continually rescuing her from her bad choices.

Don't forget to live your life. It's become a very wonderful one!!!

[Analog6]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

Sad as it is, you cannot live anyone else's life for them My Mum tried to do that to me, and I resented it and spent many years feeling resentful and ungrateful. Sorry to hear you have lost your dear MIL, it is hard to take the extra stresses family losses and crises give us.
Hang in there, Backy, we are all thinking of you and sending our love.

[2big4mysize]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

Sprry for your loss.


great planning. You are a grwat example of why failing to plan is planning to cheat! Hang in there.

[Katlam]

Re: Its hard - but it can be done!

Becky {{HUGS}} to you for all you have going on in life. Writing is your wonderful therapy. Mine is talking to my friends. Hard to stand by and see someone make what we feel is a mistake that will take them off what we see is the course towards happiness. I hope your daughter will see for herself how hard you're trying to be her support and not her judge and to help her instead of direct her. Sorry to hear about your MIL, {{HUGS}} to your hubby on the loss of his mom! Wishing you (BOTH) a peaceful and loving outcome for all of this.