If You Are Struggling Please Read This

[Debismyname]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

Angela- I have to say that your post filled my eyes with tears. I can relate to everything you said about having fallen off the wagon before and about blamming others for where you are today.

I regularly blame being abused as a child on where i am today and i just want to say that although i feel i have forgiven the person who did this, i guess on another level i haven't otherwise i wouldn't be continuing to do this. Its almost like the problem started for one reason (as a coping mechanism to deal with the abuse) and continues for another reason (because i feel unworthy etc)....

Anyway, thank you for your inspiriing and enpowering post- i definetely need your support and help and i look forward to helping you too and anyone else throughout our journey....

btw- congratulations on your weight loss and health benefits to date ! I'm proud of you )

xox

[angelawillbethinagain]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

Debismyname,

I am so glad that you wrote. First of all I wanted to touch base on the past abuse and forgiveness, Forgiveness is sooo important. It is the hardest thing to fully forgive someone who violated you in such a horrible way. Believe me it took me almost 7 years to fully forgive my ex husband who hurt me terribly. But I knew I couldn't get to a healthier place for myself until I did this. It is so easy to blame our weight issue on other people or things that have hurt us so badly in the past. And you know what thoese things may have caused terrible depression and enxiety and self esteem issues, but they didn't cause me to drive into taco bell every day and eat eat eat away my blues. I did that. Once I realized that I needed to stop blaming everyone but me for where I was at in my life, it hit me like a ton of bricks. I needed to take responsibility for myself. I can tell you that my trying to lose weight is the biggest challenge I have ever had. It is so hard and yet its something I want more than anything. I can tell you it's not easy and I am human and I make mistakes and mess up but I get right back on and keep going. I would love to support you and keep in touch. This is a journey of ups and downs and goods and bads... We need all the support we can get

I know you can do it!! One thing I want to say is, yes you may fall off the wagon, not once or even five times, but way more. The important thing is to remember your goal. You want to lose weight and get healthy. DONT let the fact that you feel off the wagon destroy your goals or make you feel hopeless. We are human. It's okey to make mistakes and it's okey to "mess up". Just as long as you continue with your goals for yourself. It's not the end of the world to fall of the wagon. Everybody does it. I used to get soooo dissapointed with myself. It would just about destroy me with guilt and shame. Not anymore. It's reality. Don't let it do that to you. And don't let the scales do it either. Best of luck to you in your journey to weight loss and a healthier happier you!

Angela

[Debismyname]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

Hi Angela

Thank you for taking the time to write to me and support me through the process of getting to be a healthier and happier me. I want to be there for you too if you should ever need to chat or cry/ lean on someones shoulder. I'll be there waiting

You are right about needing to take responsibility….thats very true. Not sure about you, but I find it a very fine line between taking responsibility and blaming myself. The first of these (taking responsibility) is very useful and I'd say probably essentail to recovery whereas I think that maybe the second one of these (blaming myself) is unhelpful and in many ways destructive. When I 'blame' myself I usually end up feeling more helpless, depressed, angry at myself and call myself all sorts of names before finally working myself through an endless amount of food until I collapse in pain from overeating. In that way I think that self-blame, at least for me, makes things worse and gives me just another reason to continue hating myself and continue going from food place to food place binge eating…..

As for weight loss being the biggest challenge ever- yep I agree. Although I haven't had kids yet, I suspect that child birth (God willing) would be a breeze if I can get through this!

The thing that really hit home with what you said was your point about having to get back on the wagon and keep going when I fall off. I have the tendency to think its too late, too far gone and impossible to salvage the day once I have put one wrong thing in my mouth. Of course thinking like that means that the whole day turns into a bad day and so I try again the next day- waiting for that one bad mouthful to set me off for yet another day….its crazy isn't it! For some reason I believe that a day is wasted with one mouthful/ piece of 'bad' food….

That’s something I definetely need to fix…..

Anyway- would love to keep in touch….

God bless you and all the very best to you too Angela- I hope your dreams come true and that this challenge is soon a thing of the past

[angelawillbethinagain]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

Debsismyname,

I know what you mean about binging from one fast food place to another and then hating myself even more. Why do we do that to ourselves? Think about it? We are depressed because we are overweight and then we make the decision to go and eat eat eat which in turn makes us heavier and even more depressed. I went through a period of time where food was my true enemy. Food shouldn't be the enemy. We need food to survive. However the fast food industry and the manufacturers of the yucky fast food and store bought foods that are bad for us are the true enemies. What I had to realize was this is the only body God is gonna give me. Why am I sabotaging my body, my health, my appearance, my self esteem? Aren't I worth more than gorging myself on food? Shouldn't I have the self control to eat the things my body should be consuming and in a healthy manner? I cannot believe how much money I wasted over the years on fast food. You really should sit back and add it up. It's crazy. I could sit down when I was felt down over whatever and finish an entire bag of candy. I could go to a fast food restraunt and an hour later be at a different fast food restraunt. You know what? It's about sitting down and really looking at yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror (which I hate to do but make myself). Really sit there and look at the reflection. Look at your body. And then do some heavy duty thinking. Think about what you really want your face and your body to look like, feel like. Think about the way you want to dress. When I am shopping, I look longingly at all of the clothes I cannot fit into right now. I look at the cute black dresses and imagine myself in it with some cute shoes. I imagine how it would feel (again) to not have the every day sluggish, exhausted when I wake up, depressing feeling. Get a piece of paper and write down 5 small goals that you want to achieve in the next two months. Goals that are not over the top. Goals you can actually really accomplish. Don't write down goals that if you don't accomplish, will make you feel like a failure. Write a list of what you love about yourself. Read it everyday. May sound funny and may feel like it is hard to find things you love about yourself. Do it and read it. You know what, we are worth it. We deserve to live a long, healthy and happy life. We deserve to wake up in the morning and be happy to start a new day with a positive loving attitude towards ourself.

We do a lot of self sabotage and I tell you, no one else is gonna live in our bodies but us. No one is gonna lose this weight but us. We have to believe that no matter what weight we are currently, we are beautiful and we can lose this weight. Self esteem is soooo important in this process. No matter what our current size is, we have to love ourselves and know that we are worth the hard work and effort. That is the first step in being successful to losing our weight. If we don't work on believing that we are beautiful and how we feel about ourselves, then we will keep the cycle of self sabotage. I would love to keep in touch. I wish you well everyday. Good health and blessings.

[DebOnAtkins]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

Angela

Because of your post I am starting Atkins over again tomorrow and giving in to it 100%. I have tried and failed and made excuses just like you have. I am so sick and tired of riding the roller coaster. On the diet, off the diet and then back on again. Something inside me has clicked and I am ready to take this on, head on.
Thanks for your inspirational and motivational post.

Debby

[daniejim]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

Tonight I wanna rededicate myself to Atkins. It's the best thing I ever did for myself. There's no other WOE that help me get rid of my addiction to food. I won't weigh myself in a month. I start tomorrow morning. I just had a giant cereal bowl, and it's 10:30 PM....

Blessings.

[atkinsrox]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

dera Angela....u rock!!!lol....
after reading ur story....i m reali inspired...i tink i m ready 2 go for my goal now.....
tnx a lot....

[sissylissy82]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

Thank you so much Angela for posting this... when I read your post, I thought I was reading something that I would have wrote. I guess I am not the only one who feels the exact same way!! I am going to rededicate myself today 100%. I actually started 2 days ago, but I have only been in it like 60%, reading this made me feel a lot better about everything. I too will probobly print this out and read it everyday! You are awesome!! Thank you so much!

[keystonejae]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

It is so easy to blame our weight issue on other people or things that have hurt us so badly in the past. And you know what thoese things may have caused terrible depression and enxiety and self esteem issues, but they didn't cause me to drive into taco bell every day and eat eat eat away my blues. I did that

I know I am an emotional eater...........so I had a talk with my son and my husband, told them I really want to lose weight, and I need their help by keeping things calm and uncomplicated..............meaning, if they are going to talk about my sons boyscout eagle project (source of stress) they need to stay calm and businesslike, if they are going to talk about any topic that causes friction (there are a few) they need to chose words carefully and no loud voices aloud if I am near by................they did agree to all this. So now I need to do my part........................It has been 2 weeks and we all are doing good. So now I am rededicating myself to this WOE. It worked for me 5 years ago and it will this time also!!

Good luck to all of you!

[jilliam09]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

wow. I'm going to have to print this out and keep it around for whenever I get discouraged, which happens alot. thank you!!!!!!!!

[kb6661]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

jimmyolsonblues,

I feel your pain bro, those Miller Lites are a tough one for me too, always have been. It's a struggle to be putting down ice water at the end of the day after being accustomed to alternate adult beverages. It's all for the greater good though.
I see you're down 80+, dude, that flat out rocks!!!

I'm only 6 days into my ( I wouldn't even want to guess ) times around.

[canela70]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

Dear Angela,

I am struggling, too. I have been struggling all my life and I will never give up. This time I have reached a record - 260lbs. Absolutely unacceptable. Like you said in your original post, when you have children, it is our responsability to show them a good example of how they should take good care of themselves in the future. I have 2 baby girls - Gabriela, 34 months-old and Victoria, 3 months old. I *really* want them to remain healthy and never go thru all the pain I've been thru because of being ow most of my life.

I have failed many times along the way, but I know this time will be the last. This is my 2nd week of induction and am looking forward to reach my long-term goal, no matter how long it takes!

PS: Your last posted November 07. I really hope you haven't given up...

[tkmurray]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

Thank you! Youve boosted my self esteem I did atkins in 2003 ans lost almost 100 pounds in 10 months needless to say emotional issues sent me spiraling down now Ive gaines all back plus 20 more!!! I like you am sick of my health spiraling out of control I WILL DO this for my kids and grandkids thanks for inspiring me!!

[Nick9973]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

<I have caused where I am today. Me and only me.>

Angela,

These two sentences really hit home for me. I found myself staring at them for a good five minutes. This is incredibly inspirational! Thank you for sharing it. You gave some awesome thoughts to stay motivated, which is something that I definitely need.

I do have a question, though. I am pretty new, so it may sound like a very simple question, but... what is "TOM"?

[hopejoy]

Re: If You Are Struggling Please Read This

TOM=time of month... it's a girl thing.
liz