Why would somebody do that?

[Summerdressgirl]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

I don't mind agreeing to disagree But I feel that is she wants to eat herself into a bean bag sure go ahead, but what about her child? and will she be going into disability and getting a check from the govt because she is too fat to work? move? medical bills? she must be making some money because her grocery bill is almost $1000 a week! but if she gets sick and can't stuff her face any more in front of the computer how will she pay for everything else? too fat/sick to work....and again what about her child? I for one want to lose this weight so I can be there for mine plus other great reasons.

Oh, I have not stated to anybody that they should not voice their opinion, I simply stated that I won't judge her. She is an adult and she has to make her own decisions, we all make decisions that others disagree with, but that does not make us bad people. I'm not sure what her social responsiblity is when it comes to something as personal as her weight. I feel no social responsibility because I'm obese, I feel a personal responsibility to myself only. Again, we must agree to disagree, the beauty of living in America is that we are all allowed to be individuals, it is her body, as you have yours and I have mine, I do not wish to have anybody preach to me how I should treat it.

mutantmom

[Mutantmom]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

Seriously, unless you know this woman personally, unless you are able to think her thoughts and feel her feelings there is no way to say she is depressed or that she has low self esteem. Her child very well might have the most loving parent on the planet, just because she does things differently does not make her a bad parent, I am sure there is something in all of our backgrounds that society would think poorly of, I am obese, does that mean I'm a bad parent? I have binged several times in my live, does that make me a bad parent...I don't think so, nor does my daughter.

I simply can not find it in me to judge this woman, I do not walk in her shoes.

mutantmom

[Carne!]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

Seriously, unless you know this woman personally, unless you are able to think her thoughts and feel her feelings there is no way to say she is depressed or that she has low self esteem. Her child very well might have the most loving parent on the planet, just because she does things differently does not make her a bad parent, I am sure there is something in all of our backgrounds that society would think poorly of, I am obese, does that mean I'm a bad parent? I have binged several times in my live, does that make me a bad parent...I don't think so, nor does my daughter.

I simply can not find it in me to judge this woman, I do not walk in her shoes.

mutantmom

Ahhh yes, cultural relativity.

Although many choose not to accept the fact that we all must make value judgments, they are there. You can choose not to 'accept' gravity, but it is a fact nonetheless. Being thin is better than being morbidly obese. This is an example of an (albeit uncomfortable) value judgement.

Freedom to do as one wishes, does not negate the fact that certain people's actions are abominable.

The best choice, in my opinion, would be for the government to stop subsidizing poor choices, or those who make poor choices, but alas, this leads us into a conversation that is not appropriate for these forums.

[Summerdressgirl]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

Seriously, unless you know this woman personally, unless you are able to think her thoughts and feel her feelings there is no way to say she is depressed or that she has low self esteem. Her child very well might have the most loving parent on the planet, just because she does things differently does not make her a bad parent, I am sure there is something in all of our backgrounds that society would think poorly of, I am obese, does that mean I'm a bad parent? I have binged several times in my live, does that make me a bad parent...I don't think so, nor does my daughter.

I simply can not find it in me to judge this woman, I do not walk in her shoes.

mutantmom

Mutantmom I believe most of us in here are or were obese at some point to get us here..it was either because of health issues, lack of motivation or a combination of both..but i doubt we got up one day and made it a goal to gain all this weight. I know I sure as heck did not nor plan to. as you can see I was at 225 that's obese and my daughter was always well cared because i could still move..but I could not carry my 7 year old because my legs could not carry both our weights..I would be out of breath to run after her in the park so I could not safely take her to the park..at that weight it affected me to interact with my daughter at some level..so eating yourself at 1000 lbs will cut out her daughter from doing things. but we can agree to disagree.

[Mutantmom]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

Mom weighing so much does not take the ability away from the child. When you were heavy I doubt if people thought you were a bad parent because of it, nor do I think that your child suffered from not being able to do 'things'.

God bless this woman, again, I refuse to judge her, she has her life and I have mine, I have far too much on my plate to worry about her parenting or weight.

mutantmom

[Summerdressgirl]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

Mom weighing so much does not take the ability away from the child. When you were heavy I doubt if people thought you were a bad parent because of it, nor do I think that your child suffered from not being able to do 'things'.

God bless this woman, again, I refuse to judge her, she has her life and I have mine, I have far too much on my plate to worry about her parenting or weight.

mutantmom

Really?? if you say so! because when you have a toddler and you can't move that takes away your ability away from the child and when your heart gives out that takes a mother from her child completely to be raised by somebody else..but that's alright I guess as long as she is happy gaining 1000 lbs. Take care.

[mission to lose]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

Everyone has good points here on both sides of the discussion, but there is a big difference between the functionability of a 300# person and that of a 1000# person.(Again remembering the one person is TRYING to GAIN). Even if we are trying not to not judge her reasons, where is the responsibility in gaining 1000#, getting to a point that you are unable to even move?

Isn't weighing 1000# almost a certain early death?

Mutantmom,
You are right, we should not judge people, since we are not in their shoes, but I feel this goes way beyond that. I hate to even say this, but are her actions much different than playing a game of "Russian Roulette"?

[Mutantmom]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

Really?? if you say so! because when you have a toddler and you can't move that takes away your ability away from the child and when your heart gives out that takes a mother from her child completely to be raised by somebody else..but that's alright I guess as long as she is happy gaining 1000 lbs. Take care.

You certainly are taking liberty with this woman's health...I didn't know one could be diagnosed online...cool.

My mother was obese when I was a toddler, she did a wonderful job, be careful, she died due to her weight at 62 so don't attack her. She raised me all by herself.

mutantmom

[Mutantmom]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

Everyone has good points here on both sides of the discussion, but there is a big difference between the functionability of a 300# person and that of a 1000# person.(Again remembering the one person is TRYING to GAIN). Even if we are trying not to not judge her reasons, where is the responsibility in gaining 1000#, getting to a point that you are unable to even move?

Isn't weighing 1000# almost a certain early death?

Mutantmom,
You are right, we should not judge people, since we are not in their shoes, but I feel this goes way beyond that. I hate to even say this, but are her actions much different than playing a game of "Russian Roulette"?

My point is that it is her decision, our opinions really don't mean squat. I am obese, I certainly hope people are not talking about me like this.

mutantmom

[Carne!]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

You're absolutely right. It is her decision and she should be allowed to do what she wants.

My point is that it is her decision, our opinions really don't mean squat. I am obese, I certainly hope people are not talking about me like this.

mutantmom

The unfortunately reality is that some people do. We live in a world where there are certain parameters, and deviation from these parameters can sometimes lead to ridicule. This woman can either choose to 1) gain weight 2)not be maligned by society. Unfortunately it's a zero sum game. She can't have both.

[Mutantmom]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

You're absolutely right. It is her decision and she should be allowed to do what she wants.




The unfortunately reality is that some people do. We live in a world where there are certain parameters, and deviation from these parameters can sometimes lead to ridicule. This woman can either choose to 1) gain weight 2)not be maligned by society. Unfortunately it's a zero sum game. She can't have both.

As far as I'm concerned she as a right to both.

mutantmom

[mission to lose]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

My point is that it is her decision, our opinions really don't mean squat. I am obese, I certainly hope people are not talking about me like this.

mutantmom

You are correct, our opinions do not mean squat, we are just sharing our opinions here on this thread.

I don't think anyone would be talking about you "Like this"--( I presume you mean the woman we are all discussing). You are trying to improve your health. And I think we can all at least agree the woman in question is not trying to improve her health. (Her reasons are her own business).

I commend you and all the rest of us here, for taking the steps to get healthier.

[Carne!]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

As far as I'm concerned she as a right to both.

mutantmom

I think we're at am impasse. Let's agree to disagree

[Summerdressgirl]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

You certainly are taking liberty with this woman's health...I didn't know one could be diagnosed online...cool.

My mother was obese when I was a toddler, she did a wonderful job, be careful, she died due to her weight at 62 so don't attack her. She raised me all by herself.

mutantmom

I do have medical background but it does not really take an MD to realize that 1000 lbs is not healthy, you can choose to ignore the facts for your own reasonings but that still does not make it right no matter what you have to say. I don't attack people's mama's but it is weird why you would bring your mama into this discussion and then ask not to attack her.

And if you are wondering if people talk behind your back because you are obese I can guarantee you 100% that people have talked about you behind your back, it is human nature we all have been talked about due to our weight either to our face or not, it has happened and it will continue to happen to others... people are just mean like that. Also children of adults who are obese get mocked at by other children, we can't pretend it does not happen just to makes us feel better because it won't help anybody.

I have my stated my opinions in regards to her decision to gain the weight having a small child and you have taken it personally..that of course is your right to do so, but it won't change my mind in regards to her choice of gaining weight on purpose. We won't agree I can see that, but to each its own.

[Summerdressgirl]

Re: Why would somebody do that?

Have any of you read this story? the 900 lbs mom? Adult Obesity - 900 Pound Mom - Oprah.com

Now my heart goes out to this lady and her children, she struggled her life with things we all struggle with at some point either with food or health or both, she wanted to be there for her children and sadly it did not happen..my heart goes out to her daughters and to her because the one thing she wanted to do was see her children grow.